Charlie Haeger (0-3, 6.56) vs. Jhoulys Chacin (1-0, 0.00).
COMMENTS: Someday Jhoulys Chacin will face Jhonny Peralta and my head will jhust explode. Jhoulys is actually pronounced "Yo-lease," which is what your landlord yells when you're trying to recover your security deposit. But Jhoulys also looks like Julie, which of course brings to mind everybody's favorite cruise director:
Which leads us to:
Which led me to search for the scene in "Airplane!" where Ted Striker, during a jailbreak, passes the guy singing the "Love Boat" theme. Turns out that's actually in "Airplane II," so enjoy this:
And who plays Roger Murdock in "Airplane!"? That's right, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. Which leads us to: Lakers @ Jazz, 5p PT on ABC. Go Purple & Gold!