Tuesday, March 06, 2018

He's a closer, a scoundrel. You'd like him.

Tuesday, February 27, 2018



Thursday, November 02, 2017

Post-World Series Game 7 Thread: Absolute Sadness

This did not go the way we thought.

Astros 5, Dodgers 1

We're used to the Dodgers' season ending poorly. This pain, in general, isn't new. What's new is the added pain of how close they got. One game away. Five runs away. One fewer batter faced by Darvish away. One missed tag-up call away. One Kenley Jansen 0-2 pitch away. One ump's thigh away. One Cody Bellinger flyout away.

So. Damn. Close.

We'll second-guess this one all winter. In the big picture, the stars of this team failed A LOT in this World Series, but they still somehow stretched it to seven games. Your unlikely heroes, your Jocs, your Culbersons, your Woods, your Kikés, picked this team up and damn near carried them over the finish line.

That's the kind of stuff I'll choose to remember. The pure joy on Joc's face as he rounded the bases. The pure joy on OUR faces as the Sons celebrated Game 4's win together. And, lost in all this, is the fact that the Dodgers MADE IT BACK TO THE WORLD SERIES. That drought is over. Like the Royals before them, the Dodgers' championship drought should be the next thing to go.

It's going to be a cold, sad winter full of coulda-shouldas, but we'll be here, doing what we do. And we'll still be here this time next year, too, with a better-than-zero chance of celebrating.

I can't wait.

Wednesday, November 01, 2017

World Series Game 7 Thread: Nov. 1st vs. Astros, 5p

Yu Darvish (2-1, 4.15) vs. Lance McCullers, Jr. (1-0, 2.95)*





There are almost no words this humble Son can conjure to capture the magnitude of this moment. (Though this Son did a pretty damn good job.) A remarkable run for the Dodgers that began with absolute madness can end with absolute jubilation tonight. The opposite is possible, sure, but now isn't the time to think about that. Now is the time to sit back, grab a drink or seven, take a deep breath, and let this beautiful, hilarious, confounding, awe-inspiring, once-in-a-lifetime team take us on one more ride.

Now and always...LET'S GO DODGERS!

*Weirdly, the Dodgers website waited until the final game of the postseason to publish postseason stats instead of regular season stats. But that's where I've gotten the numbers from for every GT, so I'm not changing anything now.

On The Edge

The old Jerry Seinfeld line about sports fanaticism is that we're all just rooting for clothes. Teams sometimes move. Players are frequently traded away. Heroes always eventually retire and fade away. Teams sign multi-billion dollar media deals to not show the games on TV. The only immutable force that binds fans together, the occasional camouflage abominations excepted, is the laundry.  Now, I'm just the derelict puzzle guy, and the world is full of think-pieces exploring every conceivable angle on what a GAME SEVEN (dramatic music) means, so I'm going to write about this weird internet island we all live on instead.
This blog, and by extension, the Dodgers, has arguably made a bigger direct impact on my life than my fellow Sons, and I'll be the first to admit that I'm a bad fan on the regular. I'm petulant when the team loses, I don't post or comment enough, and I still loathe Jason Schmidt even though it's not his fault that his rotator cuff looks like Elmer Fudd's shotgun after Bugs Bunny plugs it with his finger. Sports fandom isn't inherently virtuous, and cheering for the Dodgers isn't objectively better, with profound apologies to Tommy, than supporting any other team. Watching grown men run around on a big lawn in uniforms is a crazy thing to spend a measure of your life doing, but the reason being a fan is fun for me is because of you Sons, readers, lurkers, and other assorted maniacs talking about it.

So tonight, when sitting down to watch GAME SEVEN (dramatic music), we're going to get excited about a Dodger game one last time this year. A team will win, a team will lose, and tomorrow won't be all that different in the big picture except for the shared experience. I'll remember dumb puns and obscure references as much as any of the big plays because you're a great group of people to be completely irrational with together. Can you believe it, though? That's OUR laundry out there!

Video: The Big Lebowski, Grammercy Pictures

(c) none of the above

Screencap from Yahoo.com:

This Felt Needed

In Blue We Pray

In Blue We Trust

And F Yuri Gurriel

Tuesday, October 31, 2017

World Series Game 6 Thread: Oct. 31st vs. Astros, 5p

Rich Hill (12-8, 3.32) vs. Justin Verlander (15-8, 3.36)

Not much left to say, really. Game 5 damn near killed me, so I'm going to turn things over to our pal Erin...

Verlander, Schmerlander indeed.

Happy Hilloween, everybody. Hopefully, we'll see you tomorrow.

Monday, October 30, 2017

Post-World Series Game 5 Thread: Out of Gas

ASTROS 13, DODGERS 12 (10)

Do you have those dreams where you're trying to execute a basic task and somehow it becomes the biggest struggle in the world? I've dreamt that I'm trying to make a simple phone call yet my hands are moving like they're underwater and I keep punching the wrong numbers.

That's how watching Game 5 felt — in the late innings the Dodgers staged multiple miraculous comebacks to tie the game over and over yet they couldn't quite get over the hump and take the lead. Of course, the Astros seemed to take advantage of every opportunity they created.

I don't know how Dave Roberts does it, or the Dodger players for that matter. Five hours of YES NO YES NO AAAUGH JESUS and these guys are just playing the game like the professionals they are. And keeping their heads! — scoring eight runs from the 5th inning on.

I do know baseball pundits are calling this game one for the ages, but Dodger fans will remember this game as the one where Clayton Kershaw and Kenley Jansen plain ran out of gas. The Dodgers staked Kershaw to a four-run lead and he ended up giving up six runs, all earned, and exiting in the 5th.

Kenley, in his second inning of work and needing just one more out to put the game into the 11th inning, went HBP, walk, single to give the Astros the win.

But we need to recognize the offensive heroes: Seager and Barnes had an RBI apiece; Bellinger had 4 RBIs, including a 3-run HR in the 5th; Puig hit a 2-run HR in the 9th and Taylor tied it up at 12 with an RBI single with the Dodgers down to their last strike.

Alas, it's the pitching that worries. Kershaw, toast. Kenley...toasty. Brandon Morrow talked his way into the game and gave up four runs in six pitches. If Rich Hill doesn't basically have perfecto stuff tomorrow, it's over. (Although if we somehow manage to force a Game 7, I like our chances with a rested Darvish.)

So: Get some rest, eat your Wheaties and join us tomorrow for one, or two, last game(s). And remember...

Sunday, October 29, 2017

World Series Game 5 Thread: Oct. 29th @ Astros, 5pm


Clayton Kershaw (18-4, 2.31) vs. Dallas Keuchel (14-5, 2.90)

How about that Game 4, huh? Anyone else still buzzing? At least we get a day off today to recuperate.

Wait...what's that?

We have to do it all again tonight? And it's Kershaw/Keuchel Part II, with a chance to come back to L.A. up 3-2? Well, holy shit. We're gonna need more booze.


My Totems For Game 5

At the front window, in the house of the Rising DeShields, sits five specially selected totems. They are the chosen ones, to ward off evil spirits and bring the Dodgers an abundance hits with RISP.

Vaya Con Dios!

They Had His Back

Saturday, October 28, 2017

Post-World Series Game 4 Thread: Yes, We Like That


What. Just. Happened.

The Dodgers rose like a phoenix from the bitter ashes of Games 2 and 3 to win Game 4 in resounding fashion and tie the World Series at 2 games apiece.

The big hero 6 of the game was Alex Wood, who gave the Dodgers almost six innings when the bullpen's collective arm was hanging by a thread. And not only did Wood hold the Astros scoreless for 5 2/3 innings, he held them hitless too. A solo home run by George Springer ended both streaks, but thanks to Wood the Dodgers were in a position to do some damage.

Cody Bellinger had been having a miserable World Series, whiffing more than Midlife Crisis Dude at a college bar, but he finally finally finally finally finally finally got off the schneid with a double off starter Charlie Morton in the 7th. Logie Bear singled him in with two out and the game was tied again. Phew.

After Brandon Morrow, Chris Devenski and Tony Watson all did their jobs, the soft underbelly of the Astros' bullpen presented itself in the form of Ken Giles. The same Ken Giles who surrendered two runs in Game 2. Bellinger doubled again (!), scoring Corey Hotline and giving the Dodgers the lead...the first time they led since the end of Game 2.

The Astros plugged in Joe Buck mancrush Joe Musgrove but the results were the same and/or worse. Austin Barnes sac'd home another run and then Joc Pederson lowered the BOOM goes the cannon/watch the blood and the shit spray! His three-run high-hack HR gave the Dodgers a 6-1 cushion for Kenley Jansen...who promptly served up a dinger to Alex Bregman but escaped otherwise unscathed.

So when we think of all the big names we expect to carry us, the Kershaws and Darvishes and JTs and Coreys, today's game reminds us that the Woods and Pedersons of the world will play their role if the Dodgers are to achieve World Series nirvana.

Two more wins, mofos.

World Series Game 4 Thread: Oct 28th @ Astros, 5p

You said it, Krusty.

Alex Wood (16-3, 2.72) vs. Charlie Morton (14-7, 3.62)


What was expected to be an exciting, competitive World Series between two 100+ win teams has taken an ugly turn. Ugly starting pitching, ugly swings, ugly defense, and, oh yeah, ugly fucking racism.

Adversity sucks. The Dodgers really haven't had to face it all postseason. Yet, through all this ugliness, a ray of positivity suddenly shines from the unlikeliest of sources...our own SoSG Sax:
Hey, turn that frown upside down. All three games have been decided by two or fewer runs. It's anyone's game. And though we are down 2-1, that's with one starter flaming out, Bellinger not hitting squat, our own bullpen melting down once (they were fine last night), and the rest of our offense suddenly not clutch. We will be fine. Let's just win Game 4.

I'll have what he's smoking.

But seriously, he's not wrong. The Dodgers are still very much in this, despite how bleak things looked last night. A little good Wood will go a long way. (That goes for the bats too.) Play smart. Play loose. Leave the panicking and butt clenching to us.


How about "I am sorry." Full stop.

Friday, October 27, 2017

Post-World Series Game 3 Thread: The Disaster Artists

HOU 5, LAD 3

I'm not sure what happened on the flight from L.A. to Houston — measles outbreak? Snakes on a plane? — but the Dodgers turned in their worst postseason performance on the biggest of stages.

Yu Darvish collapsed into a puddle of goo, allowing four runs in 1 2/3 innings. Lance McCullers kindly loaded the bases in the top of the 3rd, and Corey Seager swung on the third pitch he saw into a double play.

Tony Watson and Justin Turner each brought errors to the potluck horror show and somewhere in there Yasiel Puig ran a sure single into an out at second base.

And we only lost by two runs.

On the plus side, Kenta Maeda and Ross Stripling (!) were great in relief — but even that has a downside since they probably won't be available tomorrow.

The September Dodgers showed up tonight. The team better ship those assholes somewhere far away or there won't be much more October left.

World Series Game 3 Thread: Oct 27 @ Astros, 5p

Amen, Homer.

Yu Darvish vs. Lance McCullers Jr.

It's a 1-1 series tie but Game 2's agonizing loss has Dodger fans praying to Superman/Jebus for a divine performance by Dodgers ace #1B, Yu Darvish.

Look, the two best teams made it to the World series — none of this wild card bullshit — and we're thankful one of those teams is ours. But the flipside is that our opponents aren't just going to roll over and play dead. They're unreasonable like that.

These Astros are damn good. Just ask our bullpen. But let's not lose sight of the fact that in Game 2 we finally dinged their bullpen too, touching up Ken Giles for two runs and Chris Devenski for one.

Minute Maid Park is is paradoxically both more spacious and short-porched, setting the stage for more dingers (of the pulled variety, like pork!) tonight. Expect the likes of Justin Turner and Chris Taylor to treat the 'Stros like King Hippo by uppercutting like crazy.

So join us in the fetal position as we chew our fingernails to the quick and soak our joy/drown our sorrows in alcohol. Who knows, tonight some Dodger fans might even find religion.

Wednesday, October 25, 2017

Post-World Series Game 2 Thread: That was fuckin awesome, then it blew, then it rocked then everything fucking sucked

Pfffffft that's all I got. Fuck.

Vin, with a Little Help from His Friends

Try not to cry!

World Series Game 2 Thread: Oct. 25th vs. Astros, 5p

SoSG Sax attempts to use his "media credential" to get into Game 1.

Rich Hill (12-8, 3.32) vs. Justin Verlander (15-8)

Well, the first Dodgers World Series game in almost thirty years certainly lived up to the wait, huh?
Taylor and Turner picked up right where they left off in the NLCS. Clayton Kershaw was NAILS. (As in the final nails in the "Kershaw can't cut it in the postseason" narrative's coffin.) Sure, we lost count of the double plays the rest of the Dodgers hit into, but the game was still fun, tense, and shockingly short. (Saving the team and the fans from being trapped in the record heat for too long.)

Now, it's Game 2, and the Dodgers face what is likely to be their most formidable challenge of the entire postseason, a suddenly-astonishing Justin Verlander. (Well, he's always been great, but lately he's been really, REALLY great.) That's not to say the Dodgers can't find a way to solve Mr. Kate Upton, but Rich Hill is going to have to be stingy with runs to give the offense a chance.

The Sons kept their winning record going last night with Sax, Orel, and Dusty in attendance. Sax is back tonight, but AC gets the call in place of Orel and Dusty. NO PRESSURE, AC!

The weather's still going to be hot. Here's hoping #ThisTeam is too.

UPDATE (5:35p): Sax reporting in with some at-game photos, including Vin appearing to make us cry all over again...