Saturday, May 15, 2010

Game 36 Thread: May 15 @ Padres, 5.30p

Clayton Kershaw (2-2, 3.96) vs. Kevin Correia (4-2, 3.97).

COMMENTS: (with apologies to Roald Dahl)

Chapter 15: The Petco Park

"Isn't it wonderful! whispered Clayton. "Hasn't it got a wonderful, processed food smell, Grandpa?"

"It is a beautiful field," said Grandpa Joe Torre, grinning with delight. "This being our first trip to Petco Park this year, it is a pretty beautiful--and cavernous--ballpark in which to pitch."

Suddenly, the air was filled with screams of excitement. The screams came from Hiroki Salt. He was pointing frantically to the other side of the ballpark. "Look! Look over there!" he screamed (strangely, in English; work with me here). "What is it? He's moving! He's walking! It's a little person! It's a little man! Down there in the shadow of the Western Metal Supply building!"

Everybody stopped taking batting practice, and stared at the infield.

"He's right, Grandpa Joe Torre!" cried Clayton. "It is a little man! Can you see him?

"I see him, Clayton!" said Grandpa Joe Torre excitedly. And now everyone started shouting at once.

"What is he doing?" said Augustus Broxton.

"Where does he come from?" said Violet Billingsley.

"But he can't be a real Padre," Clayton said.

"Of course he's a real Padre," Mr. Petco answered. "He's an Oompa-Loompa. But in my park, we like to call him The MSB."

Eckstein photo: Donald Miralle/Getty Images North America. And by the way, that's a toothpick he's holding.

154 comments:

Dusty Baker said...

Martin 2
Kemp 8
Ethier 9
Ramirez 7
Loney 3
Blake 5
DeWitt 4
Carroll 6
Kershaw 1

Dusty Baker said...

Dusty w/ the lineup from the scene. True man on the street, and a man of the people.

I'd like to send a shoutout to Mr Tanqueray for inventing such a delicous treat.

And a shoutout to my GT peeps whose humour I'm missing through my intermittent wireless access.

Let's Go Blue!

Dusty Baker said...

And Mrs Dusty and Mrs Dusty in Law send a special shout out to Sax for the Willie Wonka reference. They were born on the same day that movie came out and hold the movie close as one of their favorites.

Mr. Customer said...

@dusty

Bad connectivity? Crimes against humanity, I tell ya!

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

Bases juiced for 'Stros. 2 out, 3-2 count to Kaz Matsui.

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

And Matsui flies out. Damn.

rbnlaw said...

Have fun in Whale's Vagina DB!!

Anybody else get the feeling the Preakness was a s-l-o-w race?

rbnlaw said...

. . .and Chelsea with the double?

Poor, poor, Pompey. Game effort, though.

Steve Sax said...

I don't get the whales vagina comment

Mr. Customer said...

I still can' t believe we won a game in which Ramon Ortiz started.

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

Here's some explanation, Sax.

Paul said...

bottle of laphroaig and a sixer of San Adams long shot brews. Could go out after the game but might not have the need or energy to.

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

LOUD NOISES!!!

karina said...

*enthusiastic applause for Steve Sax*

Epale, everyone!

Josh S. said...

You can link to a specific point in a YouTube video? Where the hell have I been?

Oh, that's right. Here.

Dusty Baker said...

Thx for always saying exactly what I was about to say, Josh.

Josh S. said...

Eckstein photo shown actual size.

Dusty Baker said...

It's a god damned sea of fucking Blue here at Petco. Petco - where the Dodgers go.

Dusty Baker said...

Can I get a rousing chorus of the MSB song? Preferably the Josh-penned parody?

Dr. Geek said...

Bob Schaefer states that Andre Ethier hurt himself during BP.

Josh S. said...

I penned a parody?

(Note: I can barely remember this morning.)

Sons, your dad's on Think Blue TV.

Paul said...

Andre out Anderson in....my intuition to by scotch strikes again.

Josh S. said...

GAARP starting?

This is a loss.

Paul said...

Buy not by or bye. Bye Andre get that finger in some ice.

Josh S. said...

Ethier has a hurt pinky. He is now officially L.A. sports royalty.

Dusty Baker said...

Can it be? Pods having a night where they are honouring neither the military, nor the police, nor the military police.

Dusty Baker said...

I don't think I made that up, Josh. Didn't you post a little MSB parody recently?

Josh S. said...

Oh yeah! I think I just changed "bunch of cowboys" to "2nd baseman".

Josh S. said...

Dusty's right there, Vinny!

NicJ said...

Anderson is playing for a hurt Andre? at least the guy on the mound is used to minimal run support.

Matt said...

I just got to me seats in left field. Manny updates to those who want 'em!

NicJ said...

great AB's guys.

NicJ said...

there goes the no hitter

Josh S. said...

For accuracy:

Martin 2
Kemp 8
Ramirez 7
Loney 3
Anderson 9
Blake 5
DeWitt 4
Carroll 6
Kershaw 1

Josh S. said...

It really is unfair that MSB has no strike zone.

NicJ said...

there goes the shutout.

Orel said...

DeWitt should have thrown to first first.

NicJ said...

beat LA starts early today.

halfheartedly

NicJ said...

claytons got a pretty nice PO move.

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

LONEY!!!

NicJ said...

LONEY!!!

killedit!!

karina said...

Gameday wasn't working and now all i see is Loney, in play (runs) at the first pitch.

Someone tells me if Gameday is not playing with my feelings

karina said...

King James HR @Petco

!!!!!!!

NicJ said...

SMHGA

NicJ said...

kershaw looks quite mortal today, for now.

Mr. Customer said...

Mortal, I can live with from time to time. Meltdown is less fun.

Mr. Customer said...

Cheering for the strikeout is quite audible. San Diego has been invaded by Dodger fans, it seems.

Paul said...

I think San Diego is the only stadium where the beat LA chant doesn't happen organically. They flash it on te big screen with a cartoon Padre leading the way every single time the Padres get a freakin runner on base.

Very lame.

NicJ said...

Paul - yeah that was the impression i was left with my first time there.

Inferiority complex.

Paul said...

Ackbar with a laser bean shot. Well I made it to the outfield.

Orel said...

KKKK

Orel said...

Vin said "Bobba Fett."

Orel said...

Kershaw at 52 pitches through three.

Mr. Customer said...

Clay looking like he got it out of his system

NicJ said...

looks like kershaw took his ambrosia after the first inning and it took a little while to kick in.

Josh S. said...

The boo-birds for Manny are so 2009.

Mr. Customer said...

@Nicj

Demi-godlike, at the very least.

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

Is this "Chant 'Beat LA' at random intervals" night?

Orel said...

SAVE 50% ON TICKETS
Tues vs Astros
Wed & Thurs vs Padres
promo code: ANDRE16
dodgers.com/esavers

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

Has it really been that long since Phil Nevin was with San Diego?

rbnlaw said...

I'll chip in on the Field of Dreams.

rbnlaw said...

Those Pod Ray fans are sooo original.

rbnlaw said...

What's so surprising about the Reds? They usually start strong, then wilt in the heat of mid-summer; just like the Rangers.

rbnlaw said...

. . .and Corriea throws it away. Blake to second. . .one out.

NicJ said...

now the padres know annoying an MSB can be.

Orel said...

Jamey Carroll RBI! You heard me. 2-1 Dodgers

rbnlaw said...

Admiral Ackbar with the RBI single!!


Who needs Foorcal?

rbnlaw said...

Time for the lousy single, J. Mart.

Orel said...

Martin RBI! 3-1 Dodgers

Mr. Customer said...

Whee!

NicJ said...

YAY!

rbnlaw said...

"You know the opposing pitcher is eating your lunch."

Time to punch him right in the ovaries.

rbnlaw said...

. . .and that'll do it.

Orel said...

Darren Balsley

rbnlaw said...

Time for Corriea to go back to his home on Whore Island.

karina said...

Things I love about this world:

Scoring runs with two outs. Sweeter than brownies with ice cream

rbnlaw said...

@Paul 6:10:
I've been to Big Phone 3 times to see the Dodgers. I can tell you "Beat LA" is not organic at all. The Jints put it on the beer cups, on the score board, and, for all I know, in the garlic fries.

Inferiority complex is 100% spot on.

Orel said...

"A fistful of deuces." Kind of a new Vin-ism.

rbnlaw said...

Dammit, karina.
I haven't had dessert, but I'm also not done drinking. How dare you reference brownies and ice cream.

Although the daughter did make a nice batch of cornbread. . .

Mr. Customer said...

It always makes me giggle when they give Vin technobabble-heavy copy to read. It just doesn't seem to match up.

NicJ said...

claytons plan is to break all their bats.

Orel said...

KKKKKK

Dusty Baker said...

Swear to god they just had this lame-ass between inning contest here at Petco whereby they showed a little league picture of some kid and someone from crowd had to guess which current Padre it was. One of choices was MSB. I of course jumped up and yelled "It's Eckstein and it's actual size!" Mrs Dusty gave me the stinkeye but it was worth it.

NicJ said...

@Dusty, LOL!

Orel said...

You're doing God's work, Dusty.

Dusty Baker said...

Cornbread. Ain't nothin wrong with that.

karina said...

Well Rbnlaw, most of the time i talk about it, but i don't really eat it, rarely i indulge. It could have been worse, like brownies, ice cream AND arequipe.

Cornbread is delicious, though if you aren't done with drinking...do you know that "drunk doesn't eat sweets" (borracho no come dulce)

NicJ said...

whats wrong with manny?

rbnlaw said...

DB,
You ain't lyin. I love cornbread; especially homemade.

. . .and the daughter who made it is only 16. Did it from scratch.

Time for another beer.

karina said...

@Dusty way to represent!

karina said...

@Rbnlaw your daughter rocks!

rbnlaw (borracho no come dulce) said...

@karina,
Now part of my screen name. I love it!

rbnlaw (borracho no come dulce) said...

@karina,
She's the one who goes to St. Anthony HS.

Dusty Baker said...

I love it when Katina makes pronouncements like that.

Dusty Baker said...

^ Karina

Josh S. said...

I CAN'T BELIEVE WHAT I JUST SAW!!!

MR. F said...

Wow...

NicJ said...

WHA?!?!

Josh S. said...

GAARP just punched his season pass.

rbnlaw (borracho no come dulce) said...

Who was that dude batting for Anderson?

. . .whaa?

Mr. Customer said...

Graceful move by Salazar

rbnlaw (borracho no come dulce) said...

Dammit. Nicked Nic on that one.

rbnlaw (borracho no come dulce) said...

And at the end of the play, one former Angel couldn't throw out the other former Angel.

NicJ said...

ill call it an assist, RBN.

rbnlaw (borracho no come dulce) said...

Didn't catch the story about Corriea's brother. What was that about?

Don't want the good folks at Gaslamp Baseball thinking were a bunch of heartless mooks (that woould be the bunch at the MCC)

Dusty Baker said...

I can't overestimate how many Los Doyers fans are here. That last run came in and literally half the stadium stood up and cheered.

I'm growing bolder with my clever zingers now. More stinkeye, though.

Mr. Customer said...

Yankees series being hawked on the screen crawl.

*eye roll*

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

This game is delicious, but it is filling.

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

Word on the street is that Ethier's going to the DL while XP gets called up.

Mr. Customer said...

@rb

Freak accident. He was supposed to go on bereavement, but opted to stay and pitch the game anyway.

Mr. Customer said...

@MLASF

Say it ain't so, E!

rbnlaw (borracho no come dulce) said...

Thanks for the info Mr. C.
Condolences to Mr. Correia.

Mr. Customer said...

I think he did beat the throw, but damn!

NicJ said...

the shift wins!

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

Aside from that homer yesterday, Adrian Gonzalez has been a big sack of fail in this series.

Josh S. said...

OK, NL. You have 15 days to go nuts on the leaderboard. THEN DRE'S COMING FOR YOU, BITCHES!

rbnlaw (borracho no come dulce) said...

Going to a bar. Be back in a while.

Josh S. said...

Cool shot of the bullpen all standing together.

karina said...

@Rbnlaw @Dusty Baker

you make me feel like Robin Williams in Good Morning America.

I think it is a very popular saying in Latin America. It is in Venezuela

Josh S. said...

Whirly Beard!

NicJ said...

Tim Brown from yahoo says we should trade manny for cliff lee.

NicJ said...

manny is lookin' old tonight.

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

I'd make that trade in a heartbeat.

karina said...

@Mr LASF what trade?

NicJ said...

who wouldnt? well besides the M's

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

@Karina - the one Nic was referring to.

I think the M's might consider it. After all, Manny wouldn't have to play the field, and they have a pretty solid pitching surplus.

Josh S. said...

Kemp can't hit without Manny and now Manny can't hit without Ethier.

NicJ said...

eh, i think the M's could get more for Lee than just manny. they'd probably want more.

NicJ said...

yeah, i would be a little to worried about the last time we didnt have manny and the offense sunk like a stone for a few weeks.

NicJ said...

besides dre*

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

Maybe we include Antonio Perez?

NicJ said...

haha, we might have to find him first.

Paul said...

Man this team is rolling.

Can we play the nl west for the rest of the year?


It is Our division after all.

karina said...

Sorry Nic J, i only read "Manny is looking old"

@Mr LASF i agree with you 100%

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

If we had to add others to the trade, we wouldn't have to break the bank at least.

Paul said...

@7:01

I never count the Giants in anything. They are dead to me well they were never alive to be dead.

I have been to phone park plenty times and I guess the difference is the sound system blaring beat la is significantly louder than the actual chants at petco.

So thus I think while well fertilized the Giants are organic Douche bags.

Paul said...

Oops forgot the @Rbn at 7:01.

Paul said...

Blake Deground out up.

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

No way in hell Broxton goes tomorrow.

Paul said...

Damn it Blake doesn't get the concept of the anti jinx.

Paul said...

Yeah Brox will be shut down tomorrow. Might be Kuo and Belly?

Paul said...

Reed Johnson. Wears one batting glove.

Orel said...

"Eckstein, in some ways, looks like he fell out of Broxton's pocket." —Vin

Paul said...

Furless ewok up.

Paul said...

One more out and we party!

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

We win! Take that, NL West!

NicJ said...

Huh, that was quick.

Paul said...

The magic continues!

Mr. Customer said...

W00t!

Papa wants a SWEEP.

Steve Sax said...

Loved the guys with the This Is My Town fleece blanket...in San Diego!

karina said...

@Steve Sax I saw that blanket on last night's game.

@Mr Customer agree, i want a sweep, just for luck!

Orel said...

HYPGTUP!

Steve Sax said...

Mr LA SF 4:27p: thanks. I had forgotten that; gotta go back and rent anchorman again

Dusty Baker said...

Dude with the blanket was a few rows in front of me. I took a couple pics of him, in fact. He was classy. *eye roll*