Thursday, October 07, 2010

NLDS Game 1 Thread: Braves @ Giants, 6:30p

Giant Brave, get it?
(Okay, this is the last one.)

Derek Lowe (16-12, 4.00) vs. Tim Lincecum (16-10, 3.43).

COMMENTS: This is it, the final course of today's baseball meal. And while the other five dishes over the last two days were like vegetarian appetizers--stakeless--this game kicks off the most meaningful League Division Series of them all. So, we're putting this thread up just a wee bit early in order to channel all the SoSG hate that has been simmering like a crockpot stew. And speaking of crockpots, here's Giants crossed-arm pointer Brian Wilson, hanging out at home with some of his friends:

But oh yeah, the game. Admittedly, it is difficult for me to root for the Braves, the Dodgers' rival pre-realignment. But the Giants are an pusillaminous evil annoyance that simply must be eradicated. Also, this series gives Braves Rookie of the Year candidate Jason Heyward the chance to shave Oyster Pubes once and for all. So while I might not be tomahawk chopping, I'll definitely be rooting for Atlanta to noc-a-homa.

131 comments:

MR. F said...

Last one? But they're so good!

Josh S. said...

Because it can't be said enough...

rbnlaw said...

GO BRAVES!!
FUCK THE GIANTS!!


(cries)

Spanky said...

I can feel the HATE rising.

el montanero said...

oh, timmy cumrags. you've made a nice transition from being the bassist for hanson to a good mlb pitcher...at least when you're not obsessed with colorado's balls. but these are the playoffs, and your team can't hit for shit. so fuck you. fuck you, fuck your hair, fuck your stupid dollar-bill grabbing delivery, fuck the golden gate bridge, fuck full house, fuck steve perry, fuck joe morgan, fuck barry bonds, fuck hippies, fuck hipsters, fuck the 49ers, fuck the fog, fuck your tourist trap of a chinatown, fuck your overrated public transit, fuck your cold-ass shit weather, and most importantly fuck the giants.

phew! (please, d.lowe, don't screw this up)

karen said...

C'mon Braves, we Dodger fans have temporarily accepted you over to the side of The Good and Pure. Use this blessing wisely and kick gnat ass!

Spanky said...

I hope your bridge will collapse and your bay gets polluted by SHIT!

FUCK YOU GNATS

Spanky said...

Got to hell gnats and eat my SHIT for making me root for those bastard bravos YOU FUCKING ASSHOLES

Betsy said...

I love the hate in this bar - Epale Friends!. Fuck the Giants and their Puto Face pansy ass tree humping panda hat wearing fans.

Spanky said...

SUCK ON THIS GIANTS

I hope your piers burn down and your sea creatures get rabies

MR. F said...

So say we all EM!

Steve Sax said...

I don't know, guys. I kinda like the cable cars.

Just kidding.

HATE HATE HATE THE GIANTS

rbnlaw said...

Yeah, fuck your overrated ball park with a shitty location on the water so that no matter what time of year you go there, you freeze your nards (sorry ladies, speaking from experience here) off and pay waaaay too much for a Gordon Biersch marzen so you switch to Bud, but hell, that's $10 a pop, no decent eateries next to it except for an overpriced sports bar that's usually filled with Dodger fans when they're in town and they're willing to pay $14 A PITCHER FOR BUD FUCKING WEISER, named after whatever telecommunications company happens to own the Bell system at this moment, and fuck those battery-chucking, Dodger-hating, chardonnay-drinking,- foix-gras-eating, silicon valley-working, fixie-riding, pork pie hat-wearing, foul-smelling, so-called fans of theirs.

I've been holding back on the hate for a while.

Surly factor CRITICAL.
Spoiling for a fight.

Wash yer life, Timmah!

rbnlaw said...

I think that went well.

Oh, Spanktopolis, nice Slim Pickens yesterday.

No go get me a shitload of dimes.

Mr. Customer said...

I'm pretty sure I'm not going to be able watching this series until they get to Atlanta, or if the Jints start to get blown out. The cold embrace of Gameday will shield me from how much fun those fuckers are having.

Spanky said...

I HOPE ANOTHER EARTHQUAKE HITS AND YOUR FUCKING CITY DROWNS IN THE PACIFIC YOU NASTY !@#!#%$

rbnlaw said...

Mr. C:
The town next to the water is full of cold embraces.

Spanky said...

Shut up Mork

Josh S. said...

FUCK MORK

karen said...

Screw you Mrs. Doubtfire!!

Spanky said...

Smoke another one TIMMEH!

Josh S. said...

Braves leading off with an All-Star. What could go wrong?

Josh S. said...

Did you see Dick Stockton earlier? He looks like Kyle's dad on South Park when he had the surgery to become a dolphin.

Spanky said...

Fucking Josh.HaHa

Orel said...

Welcome to Club Schadenfreude!

Josh S. said...

Oh hey, I forgot they have Derrek Lee.

karen said...

MrC is right. This is going to be a long night if those black and orange bastards stay happy.

Josh S. said...

UJTD!

karen said...

Up pops the devil for the gnats!!

Josh S. said...

QUIT BLINDLY HACKING, STOOPID BRAVES

Josh S. said...

I wish Mariano really did eat chalupas. Then he'd get the runs while trying to save.

el montanero said...

LA shuts out philadelphia 1-0! er, in soccer. so suck on that you cheese-steak eating motherfuckers! HATE!

Spanky said...

Fucking panda hat.WTF!

karen said...

Sit down fat ass

Spanky said...

Sit down and have another piece of pie

el montanero said...

yeah, i can't stand to watch this on tv either...i need gameday. come on, braves, for crap's sake!

Spanky said...

Throw a strike Moron

Spanky said...

You fucking idiot.What the hell are you doing

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

FUCK THE GIANTS

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

HURTY SANCHEZ

karen said...

My poor heart barely survived that run down

Spanky said...

good

Orel said...

So many avatar puppies!

MR. F said...

Orel is excited.

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

Huff's on-site voodoo priest must have the day off.

Spanky said...

Big Deal. on to the game

Spanky said...

This is going to hurt when I say this but... Come on Braves do something

HATE ROOTING FOR OTHER TEAMS

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

Haters gonna hate.

MR. F said...

Hatters gonna hat.

karen said...

Timmeh flips his hair around like a girl

karen said...

Oh shit

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

Haeger's gonna haeg.

MR. F said...

FUCK YOU CODY ROSS

Spanky said...

Yah, What Mr.F said.

NicJ said...

H8 H8 H8

MeanieBreanie said...

Epale y'all
I tuned in just as those bastards got a run.

Timmeh wash yer hair and fix yer teeth...ya freak!

Steve Sax said...

Dammit

NicJ said...

I don't want no part of yo' tight-ass country club, ya freak bitch!

karen said...

Epale MB

I hope you brought good luck with you

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

That's enough, FDB.

karen said...

Is that a dog collar around Torres' neck??

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

I think Rob Neyer uses the retweet function a little too much.

Spanky said...

Dive for it fucker!

MeanieBreanie said...

@Karen
I wish I could say that I have but the way the day has gone not likely.

Your dog is gorgeous! My little devil killed a possum. Collecting dead vermin is a great way to start the day...ewwww.

MeanieBreanie said...

I hate the fact that they scored but at least they were held to one run. Come on Braves, let's go!

Spanky said...

Just finished watching the new South Park. I almost puked when Cartman ate a whole store section of Vagisil.

Spanky said...

FUCK YOU TIMMEH!

karen said...

@MB--Is the vermin play a Husky thing? When we lived in Lake Arrowhead mine used to find squirrel roadkill and toss it in the air then catch it.

Josh S. said...

If you want some real torture, Chris Berman is calling this game on ESPN Radio.

Spanky said...

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

karen said...

Does Timmeh look exceptionally pale tonite or is it me?

Spanky said...

Get some sun TIMMEH!

Spanky said...

YOU BIG DUMMY

MeanieBreanie said...

@Karen
I've never seen her actually kill anything so I don't know if she plays with her prey. She is definitely not happy when I dispose of it. Gawd, it's disgusting. I have never had a dog like this one. She never wants to come inside and has a one track mind which is to kill, Kill, KILL.

Josh S. said...

Christ, Ankiel sucks.

Josh S. said...

Ankemp'd.

el montanero said...

2 fuckin' errors...so much for this one. asshole braves!

Spanky said...

BRING IN TRON.

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

Ken Jeong is good at comedy.

Spanky said...

good

karen said...

Sometimes a double play is a beautiful thing.

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

UJTD

Orel said...

You can certainly see why Cox decided to IBB Sandoval.

Spanky said...

Here we go.

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

Did Gonzalez hit just one homer while with Atlanta?

Dusty Baker said...

Wash yer hair, Timmeh!!!

Dusty Baker said...

Timmeh - Marilyn Manson

Can't tell them apart now.

Spanky said...

Die-Ass You SUCK!

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

Oh you guys suck.

MeanieBreanie said...

What do Timmeh and Marilyn Manson have in common? Both were hiding behind the door when God was passing out looks.

Dusty Baker said...

Dirty South not getting it done tonight.

MeanieBreanie said...

It's not looking good but it ain't over till it's over.

Dusty Baker said...

Long lost Betsy said "Puto Face pansy ass tree humping panda hat wearing fans."

Oh, yeah! The Hate runs through her veins. I love it!

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

I don't want to live in an America where Rob Reiner is a congressman.

Spanky said...

How the hell did the Braves make the playoffs with this line up

el montanero said...

after sitting through the 162-game clusterfuck that was the dodgers' season we've now been forced to root for a team we kind of hate whose offense eerily resembles that of the dodgers. what did we do to piss off the universe?

Spanky said...

Smoke some crack TIMMEH

Spanky said...

Cox is throwing everything AND the kitchen sink at these fools

MR. F said...

I really hate the Giants.

Spanky said...

I'm going to go do a rain dance to make it rain some runs for these pretenders

karen said...

What an ugly bunch of MFer's gnats fans are

Spanky said...

dumb

MeanieBreanie said...

The Gnats and their fans are boils on the butthole of humanity.

*borrowed words from a former colleague from New York

Spanky said...

numb

MR. F said...

(cries)

el montanero said...

well that was about as fun as a prostate exam. fuck the giants AND the braves.

MeanieBreanie said...

At least we have another week of SoSG fantasy football to look forward to.

Spanky said...

Speak for yourself Meanie. HaHa




(cries)

Mr. Customer said...

Great. Yanks, Phils and Giants all with the upper hand. I'm being punished, aren't I?

*shakes fist impotently at the sky*

(sobs)

karen said...

@MB--You speak the truth, girlfriend!!

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

Go Rangers!

(cries)

Spanky said...

I don't know WTF I'm going to do when the phils and gnats play each other. A complete meltdown of emotions. Should be entertaining though.

MeanieBreanie said...

Spank
There is always hope although your up against Karina. She's a tough one! I'm up against the Professor. He's in the same boat I was in this past week. Most of his players are on a bye and he's having to make a lot of substitutions.

MR. F said...

@Spanky
Don't say things like that!!!!

(CRIES)

Spanky said...

My team is cursed. I really believe it is.

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

I would have to root for the Phillies.

(wails)

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

On the bright side I enjoy New Twitter.

karen said...

I agree with MLASF. If it comes down to the Phils and the Gnats we hang onto our hate. WE NEVER GIVE UP THE HATE!!

MeanieBreanie said...

Gnats/Phillies
It's the end of the world as we know it. I cannot imagine pulling for either one of them.

(pukes and cries)

Josh S. said...

FFFFFFFFFFFF
UUUUUUUUUU
CCCCCCCCCC
KKKKKKKKKKK

Spanky said...

I'm just going to spew HATE at both and not give a rats ass who fucking wins. HATEHATEHATE

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

I'll be damned if I have to root for the Yankees again. I demand victory from Texas and/or Cincinnati.

MR. F said...

This could be the post-season from hell. Being forced to root for the Braves, Phillies, and Yankees?

(cries)

Spanky said...

That sucked

Spanky said...

KILL THIS ABOMINATION!

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

I'm fine with rooting for the Braves, since they've been such a non-factor for a few years now.

Josh S. said...

I can root for the Braves. I mainly hated them for delaying NWA/WCW broadcasts.

Last year, my Yankee hatred won out, so it was the Phillies who made the "face turn" (to use a wrestling term) in my eyes. If it's the two of them AGAIN this year, I won't watch out of boredom. If it's Yanks/Giants, I'll drink the Bronx Kool-Aid.

Mr. LA Sports Fan said...

Heel face turn.

MR. F said...

I'm meh to the Brazes. But I HATE HATE HATE the Phillies and Yankees.

MR. F said...

Braves*

Steve Sax said...

At least that was two hits more than the Reds had.