Tuesday, May 18, 2010

SoSG Smonkstakes!

So, yesterday you Met Smonk. Today, you learn how you can Get Smonk. This is how the lucky reader/Smonk recipient will be determined:

  • Comment here as you please
  • Whenever this thread goes without a comment for 48 hours, the reader who made the last comment wins! (comments from the Sons don't count)
  • For your convenience, a "SoSG Smonkstakes" link to this thread has been placed on the sidebar.

Nothing more to it. Probably the simplest SoSG competition yet. Any questions ask here. I will leave you with more photos of Smonk during his SoSG tattoo surgical procedure:

Let the war of attrition begin!

3621 comments:

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MeanieBreanie said...

@7777
Yes, it used to be just a Texas thing. Dr. Pepper (which is now owned by the behemoth Cadbury Schweppes) purchased an interest in Big Red a few years ago. It would make sense that the channels of distribution were increased.

Personally I am fond of the diet version. It tastes just like the original.

MR.F said...

RIEEKAN: (indicates radar screen) With all the meteor activity in this
system, it's going to be difficult to spot approaching ships.

QuadSevens said...

I'm going to have to find myself a bottle of Big Red today after work. I'm craving one now! =)

QuadSevens said...

Maybe I'll try a diet Big Red too.

MR.F said...

Taking a deep breath, Han blurts out what is on his mind.

HAN: General, I've got to leave. I can't stay anymore.

MeanieBreanie said...

@7777
Sorry, didn't mean to get you jonesing. If you're calorie conscious, I promise that the diet is just as good as the original.

MR.F said...

Princess Leia, standing at a console nearby, is dressed in a
short white combat jacket and pants. Her hair is brained(sic) and
tied across her head in a Nordic fashion. She overhears their
conversation and seems somewhat distressed.

QuadSevens said...

@Meanie

It's ok. If Big Red wasn't readily available here, then it might be a problem.

MR.F said...

RIEEKAN: I'm sorry to hear that

Eric Karros said...

Mr F is relentless

MR.F said...

HAN: Well, there's a price on my head. If I don't pay off Jabba the
Hut, I'm a dead man.

Kyle Baker said...

Well hello there.

MR.F said...

RIEEKAN: A death mark's not an easy thing to live with. You're a good
fighter, Solo. I hate to lose you.

Kyle Baker said...

Hello, I must be going.

MR.F said...

HAN: Thank you, General.

Josh S. said...

Butts. LOL.

MR.F said...

He turns to Leia as Rieekan moves away.

HAN: (with feeling) Well, Your Highness, I guess this is it.

spank said...

Looks like Mr.F has blown his hyperdrive

MR.F said...

LEIA: That's right.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Oh no! That sinister-looking kid is coming to kill me. Help. Help! Aah!"

MR.F said...

Leia is angry. Han sees she has no warmth to offer him. He
shakes his head and adopts a sarcastic tone.

HAN: (cooly) Well, don't get all mushy on me. So long, Princess.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

I was at Bible Camp. I was learning how to be more judgemental.

MR.F said...

Han walks away into the quiet corridor adjoining the
command center. Leia stews a moment, then hurries after him.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Oh I see. Then everything is wrapped up in a NEAT LITTLE PACKAGE!

Really, I mean that. Sorry if it sounded sarcastic.

MR.F said...

INTERIOR: HOTH -- REBEL BASE -- ICE CORRIDOR

LEIA: Han!

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

He's going to kill Rod and Todd too. That's horrible!...in principle.

Eric Karros said...

Mr F seems to really want Smonk, presumably as a companion to the white bear in his avatar. But I fear it is driving him over the edge.

I really don't want that on my conscience.

MR.F said...

EK, I'm already past the edge and it's not from SoSG. So your conscience has nothing to worry about.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Do not be alarmed, continue swimming naked. Aw, c'mon, continue! Come on! Oh...All right, Lou, open fire.

MR.F said...

LEIA: I thought you decided to stay.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Let me be blunt: is there a labor crisis in America today?

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Mmm, I wish you'd stop spreading bad rumors about people. Remember how you got Grampa tarred and feathered?

Sure, that was twenty minutes ago.

MR.F said...

HAN: Well, the bounty hunter we ran into on Ord Mantell changed my
mind.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Hello, and welcome to the Springfield Police Department Resc-u-Fone. If you know the name of the felony being committed, press one. To choose from a list of felonies, press two. If you are being murdered or calling from a rotary phone, please stay on the line.

MeanieBreanie said...

@EK et al
I'm with you. Mr. F has clearly gone over the edge and is pushing the rest of us over as well. Just give him the friggin bear and make it stop!

Smonkstakes called due to readership insanity!

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

You've entered the code for regicide. If you know the name of the King or Queen being murdered...

MR.F said...

LEIA: Han, we need you!

Eric Karros said...

Meanie: actually, MLASF is giving him a run for his money. Reminds me of McGwire-Sosa '98.

Veorary said...

- I swear I don't know where the bombs are. Only the miners know that.

- Maybe this will loosen your tongue!

- Ahh! No! Aagh!

MR.F said...

HAN: We?

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Sorry, Bart dude. We gotta fill this thing with Epsom Salt and jam it on over to the old folks' home.

MeanieBreanie said...

This is going to be a very long competition. I feel like a lemming about to head over the cliff. Cracking open a bottle of Tommasi Amarone to help ease the pain. Salute!

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

My plan has come to fruition. Soon I will be queen of summertime...uh, King! King!

Greg Hao said...

So whose off-spring will be awarding this prize?

MR.F said...

LEIA: Yes.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Let us celebrate our new arrangement with the adding of chocolate to milk.

Veorary said...

I got the idea when I noticed the refrigerator was cold.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

I'm telling you, Ned Flanders murdered his wife!

But why? She's such a fox! I mean, what's on Fox tonight? Something ribald, no doubt...

Veorary said...

There was an optics festival and I wasn't informed?! You go now!

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

I'm sorry, that leg's going to have to come off.

Did I say "leg"? I meant that wet bathing suit.

MR.F said...

HAN: Oh, what about you need?

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Hey Nelson, he's really hurt. I think he broke his leg.

I said, ha ha.

MR.F said...

LEIA: (mystified) I need? I don't know what you're talking about.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Ice cream! Ice cream! We are all out of ice cream!

Veorary said...

Oh! The gentle caress of a summer breeze...

MR.F said...

HAN: (shakes his head, fed up) You probably don't.

Veorary said...

He's going to kill Rod and Todd too! That's horrible -- in theory.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

I wish there was some other explaination for this...but there isn't. I'm a murderer, I'm a murderer!

Then that's not the real Ned Flanders.

I'M A MUR-DIDDLY-ERDILER!!

If that's not Flanders, he's done his homework.

MR.F said...

LEIA: And what precisely am I supposed to know?

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Over here we have the Hick Tub, the Insta-Rust, there's the Lightning-magnet, this is the Tinkler…

Ooooh! The Tinkler! I like the sound of that.

Veorary said...

Look, question lady - this job isn't what I do. I play keyboards.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Marge, can you set the oven to cold?

Veorary said...

Cast of characters: Viceroy Fizzlebottom, a hearty cherub of a man.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

I'm out of quotes. Until tomorrow, ladies and gentlemen.

Veorary said...

- Hi, bart.

- Hey, bart.

- Hello, Mrs. Cumberdale.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Or am I?

Unknown said...

Oh no...it's now become a 3-way descent into madness.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

“Madness is to think of too many things in succession too fast, or of one thing too exclusively”

- Voltaire

MR.F said...

HAN: Come on! You want me to stay because of the way you feel about
me.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

No!

MR.F said...

LEIA: Yes. You're a great help to us. You're a natural leader...

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

martian

MR.F said...

HAN: No! That's not it. Come on. Aahhh -- uh huh! Come on.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

flapdoodle.

MR.F said...

Leia stares at him, understanding, then laughs.

LEIA: You're imagining things.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

I would like to be the type of guy who could really make use of a stationery store. You know someone who's corresponding, keeping a journal, sending out invitations.

MR.F said...

HAN: Am I? Then why are you following me? Afraid I was going to leave
without giving you a goodbye kiss?

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

But you're not that guy. You're a guy who wears sneakers and watches TV.

MR.F said...

LEIA: I'd just as soon kiss a Wookiee.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

As it happens.

rbnlaw said...

I've got a bad feeling about this.

MR.F said...

HAN: I can arrange that. You could use a good kiss!

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

(Looking at display case)

ELAINE: I don't see it.

rbnlaw said...

Got to find something I can quote ad naseum.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

JERRY: What about this one?

MR.F said...

Angrily, Han strides down the corridor as Leia stares after
him.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

ELAINE: No, no that's a pen.

MR.F said...

INTERIOR: HOTH -- REBEL BASE -- ANOTHER ICE CORRIDOR

A familiar stream of beeps and whistles herald the approach
of Artoo-Detoo and See-Threepio, who appear around a corner
and move along an ice wall toward the main hangar.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

(Salesman, Barry appears)

BARRY: May I help you?

MR.F said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

ELAINE: Yes, I'm looking for the Rolamech 1000. It's a mechanical pencil.

MR.F said...

Artoo beeps a stream of protesting whistles.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

BARRY: Oh I know the Rolamech 1000.

MR.F said...

THREEPIO: Oh, switch off.

MR.F said...

INTERIOR: HOTH -- REBEL BASE -- MAIN HANGAR DECK

The two robots stop at Han Solo's space freighter. Han and
Chewie are struggling with their central lifters.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

NOOOOO

MR.F said...

HAN: (to Chewie) Why do you take this apart now? I'm trying to get us
out of here and you pull both of these.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Oh come on.

MR.F said...

Chewie grumbles in irritation.

Bryan said...

Don’t kid yourself, Jimmy. If a cow ever got the chance, he’d eat you and everyone you care about!

MR.F said...

THREEPIO: Excuse me, sir.

Kyle Baker said...

kjbhjbhjvhfxdfzdfv hb khvkh

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

zwab

MeanieBreanie said...

Day 4 and the insanity continues.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

“Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

- Albert Einstein

MeanieBreanie said...

And thus it goes on and on.

Kyle Baker said...

Just a small town girl
Living in a lonely world
She took the midnight train going anywhere
Just a city boy
Born and raised in South Detroit
He took the midnight train going anywhere

A singer in a smoky room
A smell of wine and cheap perfume
For a smile they can share the night
It goes on and on and on and on

{Refrain}
Strangers, waiting, up and down the boulevard
Their shadows searching in the night
Streetlight people, living just to find emotion
Hiding somewhere in the night

Working hard to get my fill
Everybody wants a thrill
Paying anything to roll the dice
Just one more time
Some will win, some will lose
Some were born to sing the blues
Oh the movie never ends
It goes on and on and on and on

{Refrain}

Don't stop believing
Hold on to that feeling
Streetlight people

MeanieBreanie said...

Journey was great back in their day. It's such a shame that Steve Perry's voice is forever gone.

Kyle Baker said...

And that he's a Gnats fan.

MR.F said...

HAN: (to Chewie) Put them back together right now.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

chickens

MR.F said...

THREEPIO: Might I have a word with you, please?

Josh S. said...

And then I pour the milk.

MR.F said...

HAN: What do you want?

QuadSevens said...

*sips a scotch and watches the madness unfold*

MR.F said...

THREEPIO: Well, it's Princess Leia, sir. She's been trying to get you
on the communicator.

Paul said...

This whole thing is a shame and mockery. It is a shomockery, not it's a shomockavesty.

spank said...

Reading this thread is making me want to smoke some smonk weed. Serenity Now!

Josh S. said...

Do nurples come in other colors, aside from purple?

I hereby declare that an orange nurple is a purple nurple administered by someone with Cheeto fingers.

MR.F said...

HAN: I turned it off. I don't want to talk to her.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Flim flam.

MR.F said...

THREEPIO: Oh. Well, Princess Leia is wondering about Master Luke. He
hasn't come back yet. She doesn't know where he is.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

knuckle

MR.F said...

HAN: I don't know where he is.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

JERRY: Seems to me, that button is in the worst possible spot. [talking about George's shirt] The second button literally makes or breaks the shirt, look at it: it's too high! It's in no-man's-land, you look like you live with your mother

MR.F said...

THREEPIO: Nobody knows where he is.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

GEORGE: Are you through? [kind of irritated]

MR.F said...

HAN: What do you mean, "nobody knows"?

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

JERRY: You do of course try on, when you buy?

Jason said...

337, just because

MR.F said...

Han glances at the fading light at the entrance of the ice
cave as night slowly begins to fall on the planet.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

GEORGE: Yes, it was purple, I liked it, I don't actually recall considering the buttons.

MR.F said...

THREEPIO: Well, uh, you see...

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

JERRY: Oh, you don't recall?

MR.F said...

Han jumps down off the lift, as Threepio follows him.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

GEORGE: [pretends he's talking into a microphone] Uh, no, not at this time.

MR.F said...

HAN: Deck Officer. Deck Officer!

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

JERRY: Well, senator, I just like to know, what you knew and when you knew it. [a waitress approaches the table]

MR.F said...

THREEPIO: Excuse me, sir. Might I inqu-...

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

WAITRESS: Mister Seinfeld. [she pours coffee in his cup] Mister Costanza. [she wants to pour coffee, but George stops her]

MR.F said...

Han abruptly puts his hand over Threepio's mouth as the
deck officer approaches.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

GEORGE: Are, are you sure this is decaf? Where's the orange indicator?

MR.F said...

DECK OFFICER: Yes, sir?

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

WAITRESS: It's missing, I have to do it in my head: decaf left, regular right, decaf left, regular right...it's very challenging work. [ironically]

MR.F said...

HAN: Do you know where Commander Skywalker is?

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

JERRY: Can you relax, it's a cup of coffee, Claire is a professional waitress.

MR.F said...

DECK OFFICER: I haven't seen him. It's possible he came in through the
south entrance.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

GEORGE: How come you're not doin' the second show tomorrow?

MR.F said...

HAN: It's possible? Why don't you go find out? It's getting dark out
there.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

JERRY: Well, there's this uh, woman might be comin' in.

MR.F said...

DECK OFFICER: Yes, sir.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

GEORGE: Wait a second, wait a second, what coming in, what woman is coming in?

MR.F said...

The deck officer leaves hurriedly, as Han takes his hand
off Threepio's mouth.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

JERRY: I told you about Laura, the girl I met in Michigan?

MR.F said...

THREEPIO: Excuse me, sir. Might I inquire what's going on?

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

GEORGE: No, you didn't!

MR.F said...

HAN: Why not?

MR.F said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

JERRY: I thought I told you about it, yes, she teaches political science? I met her the night I did the show in Lansing...[looks in the milk can] There's no milk in here, what...

MR.F said...

THREEPIO: Impossible man. Come along, Artoo, lets find Princess Leia.
Between ourselves, I think Master Luke is in considerable danger.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

GEORGE: Wait wait wait, what is she, [takes the milk can from Jerry and puts it on the table] what is she like?

MR.F said...

INTERIOR: HOTH -- REBEL BASE -- MAIN ICE TUNNEL

The deck officer and his assistant hurry toward Han as he
enters the tunnel.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

GEORGE: [with a big smile] So, ya know, what, what happened?

MR.F said...

DECK OFFICER: Sir, Commander Skywalker hasn't come in through the
south entrance. He might have forgotten to check in.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

JERRY: Oh, nothing happened, ya know, but is was great.

MR.F said...

HAN: Not likely. Are the speeders ready?

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

GEORGE: Oh, nothing happened, but it was...

MR.F said...

HAN: Then we'll have to go out on Tauntauns.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

JERRY: Yeah.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

DECK OFFICER: Sir, the temperature's dropping too rapidly.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

GEORGE: This is great!

MR.F said...

DECK OFFICER: Sir, the temperature's dropping too rapidly.

Paul said...

The game is still the same. It is you who have changed!

MR.F said...

HAN: That's right. And my friend's out in it.

Josh S. said...

I get out the Navy, my brother's famous, his fame is exploding. I'm real proud of that. You know what I mean. I'm getting to hang out with people that I only read about in magazines and seen on the screen somewhere. I'm standing next to them, being at dinner tables with them. And you know it was a bugout, man. And you know, I was a huge Rick James fan. That's the first person that I would say that out of all the celebrities that I met, that I was starstruck.

Kyle Baker said...

Hoth is cold. So very cold.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

JERRY: Yeah.

MR.F said...

ASSISTANT OFFICER: I'll cover sector twelve. Have com-control set
screen alpha.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

GEORGE: So, ya know, she calls and says she wants to go out with you tomorrow night? God bless! Devil you!

MR.F said...

Han pushes through the troops and mounts a Tauntaun.

DECK OFFICER: Your Tauntaun'll freeze before you reach the first
marker.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

JERRY: Yeah, well...not exactly. I mean, she said, you know, she called this morning and said she had to come in for a seminar and maybe we'll get together.

rbnlaw said...

HA! 3 can play this game.

Bayern out to a cracking start of the second half. Good chances.

rbnlaw said...

Shot over the bar for Inter. Milito just over and saved.

rbnlaw said...

Wasted through ball. Goal kick to Bayern.

rbnlaw said...

Jose Mourinho a master tactician; has his team come out of the tunnel late for the beginning of the second half; backfires right away.

rbnlaw said...

Schweinsteiger having a decent game. I believe his name means "pig killer" in German.

rbnlaw said...

Free kick to Inter, wasted over the bar.

rbnlaw said...

Altintop with a chance for Bayern; goes wide.

rbnlaw said...

Corner to Inter; cleared by Bayern.

rbnlaw said...

Italian fans not fond of Bayern's ball control offense.

rbnlaw said...

Lousy corner play for Bayern.

MR.F said...

HAN: Then I'll see you in hell!

MR.F said...

400

rbnlaw said...

Muller trying to get something started for the German club.

rbnlaw said...

Nicked 400 from me. Damn.

Nostradamus said...

There is a man in need of a game thread in here

MR.F said...

Han maneuvers his mount out of the cave and races into the
dark bitter night.

rbnlaw said...

Milito with a brilliant goal; his second.
Inter 2-0 over Bayern Munich.

Nostradamus said...

Again with Milito

rbnlaw said...

MLASF,
Klose as I'm going to get. Besides, I can't quote movies or shows like you and Mr. F.

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