Thursday, April 15, 2010

Post-Game 8 Thread: Census Edition

DIAMONDBACKS 9, DODGERS 7 (11)

Have no fear, census tabulators: I've done the math, and figured out that we can't win a game when we score fewer than seven runs. Things looked promising when we eked out that magical seventh run in the bottom of the ninth inning (off a Manny Ramirez leadoff double and Casey Blake cashing him in with a double of his own). But another short outing from a starting pitcher, coupled with wasted baserunners in the ninth and tenth innings burning through the last remains of our bullpen, and we were left with little choice but to use Russ Ortiz for the 11th. We all know how that story was going to end.

So, change the rule to we don't stand a chance of winning if we can't score seven or more runs--and even then, it's in question. Yes, that's an inspiring rallying cry, something akin to Mel Gibson yelling "FREEEEEEDOMMMMMM!" in Braveheart. But come on, we had 19 frickin' hits tonight. Can't we get a win with that? No?

No matter how much of a lead our offense seems to spot the pitching staff early on--a three-run lead through three innings; a 5-3 lead after four frames--our arms can't hold on to the advantage. Or even hold on to the tie, for pete's sake. One would think 18 hits would be enough to register the win. Alas, not for this team.

Chad Billingsley had his expected shaky inning in the fourth, giving up three runs and the lead in a blink of an eye, and ended up lasting only 5.2 innings while giving up 6 ER (3 BB, 5 Ks). We needed Ramon Troncoso to get the elusive third out in the sixth, but after that Carlos Monasterios promptly gave up a leadoff HR to Justin Upton to make it 7-6, and we needed Ramon Ortiz to bail us out of the seventh.

Our pitching corps is so thin and the staff so unreliable, we trotted out fifth starter Charlie Haeger to have to clean up the ninth. Jonathan Broxton pitched a scoreless tenth, and then Russ Ortiz came out in the eleventh and was thoroughly useless, using eight batters and giving up two extra-inning runs (Matt Kemp's misplay of a pop fly didn't help any, either).

The loss unfortunately negated the nutritional goodness of Rafael Furcal and Andre Ethier (both 3-for-6), Kemp (2-run HR, his third in four games, and 3 RBI), Russell Martin (3-for-4), and two RBI for Ramirez (a perfect 3-for-3 before being replaced by Jamey Carroll (PR) and Reed Johnson (LF)). The wasted baserunners and for-naught offensive output were depressing, but it's not the offense who takes the rap on this game. It's the arms. Or lack of them. And I don't need a census form to figure that out.

27 comments:

Kyle Baker said...

*crawls off to bed*

I might wake up and post some vitriol later on this morning.

Krusty, out.

NicJ said...

Everyone get your rest we all have to be up early to watch Russ Ortiz's retirement press conference.

Nostradamus said...

Opposite of fun.

MR.F said...

Nice pic.

NicJ said...

Nuf?

Well I've had Nuf of this shit.

Orel said...

Hi guys, what'd I miss?

MR.F said...

Ortiz's 8.31 ERA is still lower than 2006 campaign with Baltimore. =(

NicJ said...

We all knew the game was over when
torre waived the white flag that is Russ' XXXXL jersey.

NicJ said...

Orel, two games worth of failure.

Steve Sax said...

Russ Ortiz must be stopped

Steve Sax said...

At least we have the Padres to keep us company in the cellar

Josh S. said...

At least when we face Haren later, the bullpen won't have a lead to blow.

NicJ said...

So last season the home game winning streak to start the season was 13. This year, one.

Josh S. said...

They're trying to play thirteen HOURS straight this year.

Steve Sax said...

It's 2:30a and I'm still pissed off at Russ Ortiz.

LLCoolL said...

Do you get the feeling that Bills and Kershaw will always be one year away from being great? Today's fun fact: the Ortizes have matching 8.31 ERAs now.

Fred's Brim said...

I cut out the middle man and saved myself the torture of watching this shitpile of a game and went straight to drinking last night. Turns out I made the right choice.

Has Eric Stults gone to Japan yet?

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Well that was disappointing.

Wicks said...

When Kuo and Bellie come back the Ortiz's will be gone. That will help a little but we shall need another arm I think.

Kyle Baker said...

If Kemp is wearing striped Polo shirts, he catches that ball.

Betsy said...

How about we keep the walks to a min today?

rbnlaw said...

@FB:
No shit. What the hell with shipping Stults off to Japan and keeping the fat load of crap that is Russ Ortiz. Fucking spring training is a joke. Low ERA's whilst facing scrubs is no way to make the team.

Come back Guillermo Mota; almost all is forgiven.

Fred's Brim said...

I still say other teams were sandbagging against the Ortizesezes in spring training just so we'd think they were good and give them a roster spot. If they were smart, they'd go easy on them in the next week or two so Ned would keep them around, instead of chopping off their heads and throwing them in the wood chipper like he should

Fred's Brim said...

I notice that AC was at the game yesterday. He had a sketchy record in attended games last year, didn't he? Does he need to stay away from the park, for the sake of the team (and especially us)?

Josh S. said...

I hate those Ortizes to piezes!

Wesley Vento said...

my gut told me, that when Casey's double was not a HR, that I should go to bed and forgo extra innings viewing. i'm going to reward my gut with something delicious later.

Paul said...

It is one thing to take a flyer on an unknown pitcher after a good spring but we all knew what the Ortiz brothers could or couldn't do! The demise of Sherill just has magnified the decision. Hopefully flat breezy isn't hurt and will sober up.

Oh and I love Matt Kemp but his lack of focus in the outfield this year is disturbing.

Koroda HAS to have a solid outing tonight because even a win by way of escaping another bullpen meltdown again will leave us vulnerable to a Giant beatdown.