Clayton "Minotaur" Kershaw (0-0, 3.00) vs. John "Remember the" Maine (5-4, 3.41) (SoSG's first Spanish-American War reference!)
COMMENTS: The Dodgers are of to a rollicking start to this roadtrip, now 0-4 with three games to go. In the past four games we've witnessed impotent offense (particularly with RISP), blown saves by both of our bulwarks (Jonathan Broxton and Takashi Saito), and runners thrown out at home (Juan Pierre, yesterday in the first inning). Despite daily shuffling of the cards, the nine spots in the lineup aren't enough to hide the warning-track power of Jeff Kent, the three-pitch strikeouts from Matt Kemp, the average-plummeting slump of James Loney, or the sub-Mendoza numbers from Chin-Lung Hu. And that's not even counting the worthless spot reserved for Mark "Black Hole" Sweeney, the worst pinch-hitter slot in the majors, let alone the DL spot occupied by Andruw Jones. With Rafael Furcal still unavailable, this comedy of errors is enough to raise the (presidential campaign-paraphrasing) question: are we better off now (under Joe Torre) than we were with Grady Little? I shudder at the thought.
But don't blame the Sons of Steve Garvey, as we are once again pulling out all the stops, putting SoSG's own Eric Karros on a plane to get out to Shea this evening and root on our intrepid Dodger squad. Look for the dashing man with Dodgers body paint swimming around in 50% humidity. (Oh yeah, and EK can't bend at the knees, so don't ask him to pick up the card you want him to autograph off the ground.)