Sunday, July 19, 2009

Julio Lugo's Guide to Life

The Red Sox have released Julio Lugo, making him the second ex-Dodger to be let go this week after Cleveland released Matt Herges. The Rockies snapped up Herges and Lugo looks certain to be picked up by another team.

But it's Lugo's assessment of his failed relationship with Red Sox that caught my eye. From the Boston Herald:

"When you see a good looking girl, you get married and sometimes things don’t work out," Lugo said. "I gave it my best and unfortunately things didn’t work out. This is the best for both parties. I wanted it to work out but it didn’t."

(Emphasis mine.) Wow, is it really that easy? Living in Los Angeles, I see many good-looking girls. (Checking Lugo's quote.) Next step: Get married. (If I had only known.)

Actually, Lugo's quote should go more like this:

"When you see a good looking girl, you want to talk to her but you're deathly afraid of rejection so you down a beer or two or eight but by then she's leaving so you stumble up to her and use the opening line you've been working on all night but it doesn't come out right and she just ignores you so you get her name off her credit card slip and Google her and she's on Facebook and you try to friend her but she ignores you again so you send her a message saying DON'T IGNORE ME and she threatens to call the cops and sometimes things don’t work out," Lugo said. "I gave it my best and unfortunately things didn’t work out. This is the best for both parties. I wanted it to work out but it didn’t."

See? Professional athletes can be just like you and me! Or at least me!

2 comments:

Eric Karros said...

Orel, sounds like your game could use an Ed Hardy Tee.

Steve Sax said...

Maybe that's just how reptiles roll.