Monday, May 28, 2007

Boffo vs. Da' Bums Week Four - Booty Time*

* The Dodgers Win! * The Dodgers Win!

Thanks to the pity and benevolence of the Delino, the Dodgers won a special handicapped match over Pirates 3 (not unlike how the late Andre the Giant used to battle multiple foes simultaneously). Though the Dodgers rallied valiantly for their (asterisk) weekend victory, the real reason they won rests firmly on Jack Sparrow's limp shoulders. Maybe America got sick of too many trilogies while Red Heat languishes sequel-less. After Shrek and Spidey, a $120 million weekend just seems a little ordinary, especially to a studio that spent $300 mill producing a three hour pirate flick.

Weekend Top movie Wkend gross ($MM) Dodgers’ runs scored Runs x 3.5 multiplier Wkend winner
May 4-6 SpiderMan3 $148.0 0,4,6 (10) $35.5 Spidey
May 11-13 SpiderMan3 $60 2,7,10 (19) $66.5 Dodgers
May 18-20 Shrek3 $122 1,2,1 (4) $14 Shrek
May 25* Pirates3 *$43 9,2,2(13) $45.5 *Dodgers

Good to see that Jack Sparrow doesn't got anything on Jeff Kent's still powerful bat.

The movie itself is surprisingly good, especially after the tedium and macro economic level complexity of Dead Man's Chest. Johnny Depp is still the buccaneer equivalent of a schmuck with a lampshade on his head, which he somehow pulls off BRILLIANTLY. Keira Knightley is much less annoying this go around and stays focused on what she's good at - being hot. The skeleton of Keith Richards shows up briefly, almost making up for 25 years of mediocre Stones albums. My one-time drinking buddy Geoffrey Rush adds some much needed Pirate accuracy, and Chow Yun-Fat is perfect in a role that Mickey Rooney would have played in the 60s. If you have three hours to kill (and if you're an avid baseball fan, then you know you do), Pirates 3 is not a bad way to stay indoors during a beautiful LA weekend. And with hangings, prostitutes, stabbings, and a man breaking off his frost-bitten toe, it's perfect family entertainment.


Steve Sax said...

Wait a minute, I thought Pirates 3 took in ~$110 this weekend. What gives? The Dodgers lost.

Delino DeShields, Sr said...

Oh you. This was the special one day only handicapped match. Since the Dodgers had no chance of reaching $100 Mill, I gave them a safety net. BoffoVBums will go back to normal next week.

Steve Sax said...

Hey, would the Dodgers appreciate a victory if it came under disputed and controversial terms?

Oh wait, that was Sunday's game vs. Chicago. My bad.