TIGERS 14, DODGERS 5
In a game I admittedly didn't see one iota of, I may be the best qualified to provide a succinct summary, because anyone who actually saw the debacle must surely be blinded:
Dodgers bats teed off early against a recently-struggling Justin Verlander, taking a 5-0 first inning lead. That didn't last long as the Tigers roared back for five runs in the second. Ryu could never settle down and the German team began pouring in the goals seemingly at will. I might have mixed up my sports reports but you get the picture. Let's hide this one away and pretend it never happened.