Clayton Kershaw (5-4, 1.88) vs. TBD (?-?, WTF)
As of 10:06p on Friday June 14, that guy up above was the designated opponent to face Dodgers ace (by talent, if not just survival) Clayton Kershaw. Like an unanswered Question, this faceless starting pitcher (a swashbuckling buccaneer, no less) scares the hell out of me.
The Dodgers look to earn a win (heck, we'd even take a gift win) for only the second time in a week. We're worse than the frickin' Angels, for pete's sake. It doesn't take a Sage--or a Rorschach test--to realize that we're in trouble today, face or no face.
UPDATE (Orel): The mystery pitcher is...Brandon Cumpton! Ha ha, what a name! I mean, who calls their kid Brandon?
90 comments:
Schumaker LF
Puig RF
Gonzalez 1B
Ramirez SS
Ethier CF
M Ellis 2B
Uribe 3B
A Ellis C
Kershaw P
Happy 64th birthday, real Dusty Baker!
I'm here. Let's see some magic
Minor league pitcher takes us out.
Can Magic pitch middle relief?
At least we win the games that Kershaw pitch........ugh.
Wishing it was football season. I don't feel the pain since we have no team.
How bad is it?
Dylan Hernandez @dylanohernandez 38s
Brandon Cumpton has a #NoHitter through three innings.
Well shee-it.
PGT idea: Cumpton all over the Dodgers.
Gross but funny nomo
It's a little on the nose.
But mostly in the eyes.
The next fight on the field will be between Dre and the Puigster
@Gnomes: That would take a lot of Cumption.
Base hits, oh boy another Dodger quasi-rally, where no runs are scored
Isn't Cumpton the vamp from True Blood.
Tie game!
Schumacher rib-eye!
Making up for the bad throw
Some run support for Kershaw? Who are these guys.
Nice
Kershaw owes Schu a steak dinner.
We have to do something with Dre and Cumpton, no?
That play was a million times more awesome because he robbed Jussell.
C'mon KJ. Let's finish this.
Kenley touching 93.
Siddown, Jones!
Damn. Tie game.
Well ain't that just the way our season is going.
Bullpen costs Kershaw another win.
Still a better closer than League.... right?
Uribe quick like cat!
Torture.
AWKS
#AnotherWastedKershawStart
Then this has been an AWKSward season.
That girl in the Malibu commercial has huge alien eyes.
Melanacon pronounced Mel-AN-sin. I like to call him Melon-con.
Now I'm melancholy.
Moylan Ks Cutch!
Well at least the Giants just lost their lead too.
Uribe quick like cat! Not a repeat.
Except they walked in the tying run in the bottom of the 9th.
It's the Giants, which means Marco Scutaro will come off the DL and get a walkoff inside-the-park HR or some shit like that.
Giants lose. Haha
Really? I'll take it.
Things I never thought I'd see: AGon as a Dodger holding Martin as a Pirate at first base.
Puig just bought us another AB.
Things I don't miss:
Female Dodger fans screaming Martin's name.
Ha! First-pitch swinging saves the Dodgers!
@EP: Now they scream Andre's name.
... and get turned down for photos with him.
We have to end this before we reach the end of the reliever line with he who shall not be named
Dre double!
Mellis bunts Dre to third. We're playing for one run?
Ureeeeeeeeebe!
Your in!!
The legend of Uribe grows.
No no no no no!
BLeak! Noooooooo
My god. League will be trying to get the save.
Need another 5 runs.
OH NOOOOOOOOOOO
There we go! Keep scoring.
Punto: "Shit, League's warming up? Better knock Uribe in."
We need six more runs to be safe with league coming in
Let's see if he can blow the already blown save.
I think BJK must be on a plane to Pittsburgh to murder Lyons for his latest pony comment.
If League gets a 1-2-3 inning the first round at the next SOSGfest is on me.
If League blows this his career should be over.
If League gets this save, will he be closer again?
@Paul: Duly noted.
No drama.
Ha! Paul's off the hook already.
I will still buy if he gets the next 3 out.
League gives up a lead-off single.
Uribe, quick like fatcat!
Well I tried.
League is doing exactly what he's supposed to be doing: inducing ground balls.
This can only end well.
Wow, League & A.J. putting on a show here.
Two down!
Okay. Even if League gets the save, no way does he become closer again. Right?
Cover me Porkins.
Ha! Dodgers win despite themselves!
Love AGon pumping up League there.
@orel. Didn't see the latest.
We did it!
*streaks*
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