Wednesday, December 09, 2009

Five Ways Randy Wolf Can Spend His New $27M $29.75M Bounty

Action Figure
Est. $ value
# of figures $27M $29.75M can buy
Telescoping-Lightsaber Darth Vader
Vinyl Cape Jawa
Rocket-Firing Boba Fett
Tori Spelling Yak-Face
Blue Snaggletooth

Thanks to Orel for the idea; David Julian for the pictures and Reis O'Brien for the estimated values; and this guy for the background on these figs.


Josh S. said...

Clayton Kershaw: got your reward and you're just leaving, then?

Randy Wolf: That's right, yeah. Got some old debts I gotta pay off with this stuff. Even if I didn't, you don't think I'd be fool enough to stick around here, do you? Why don't you come with me? You're pretty good in a game. We could use you.

Kershaw: Come on. Why don't you take a look around. You know what's about to happen, what they're up against. They could use a good pitcher like you, you're turning your back on them.

Wolf: What good is a reward if you can't spend it on beer and brats? Besides, trying to win the World Series with this ownership is not my idea of courage. It's more like...suicide.

Kershaw: Okay. Take care of yourself Randy. I guess that's what you're best at isn't it?

Wolf: Hey, Clay. May divorce be with you.

Fite Club said...

EPOCH!!! Nice work, Josh

Steve Sax said...

Josh S. We have a winner. Wow.

Nice work.

rbnlaw said...

I had this whole post about the Star Wars figures and models I could unload all planned out; then I read Josh's comment.

I walk away in awe.

Josh S. said...

Thanks guys. Doing stuff like this distracts me from terrible things like the news that Ned is interested in Craig Counsell or Juan Uribe to fill 2nd base.

Fred's Brim said...

*bows down to Josh*

Keven C said...

Great shot, Josh, that was one in a million!

Orel said...

Bravo, Josh (and Keven)!

Steve Sax said...

Josh, an hour later, I'm still laughing at your last line. Man, this is poetry.

MR.F said...

That made my day, Josh S.

Josh S. said...

This thread has done wonders for my self-esteem.

Kevin Baxter said Randy's agent called Ned one last time before the Brewers deal was signed and Ned turned him down.

He wanted to come back!

Jason said...

I have to admit, I'm kind of glad Ned turned down the opportunity to match (I assume) the Brewers offer. I just don't see Randy lasting through all 3 years at nearly $10 million per. This screams of the Derek Lowe contract from last winter (though admittedly at a far lower price).

Speaking of Lowe, Atlanta is apparently willing to eat part of his contract for the right trade. Let's hope Ned doesn't do anything stupid.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Astounding. Just astounding.

Josh S. said...

Jason, I definitely agree with you that Ned shouldn't have tried to offer anywhere near that, but sometimes it hurts a fan's heart when a genuinely nice guy wants to stay and the "business" side of the sport prevents it from happening.

Orel said...

1979 STAR WARS ROCKET FIRING BOBA FETT ACTION FIGURE C9, only $12,999.99! And almost certainly probably not a counterfeit!