For years of our marriage, I have been insistent in my proclamations that I have not transgressed. But now comes damning evidence indicating that I have indeed been peeing in the shower on a semi-regular basis. And I understand that you want to suspend me from showers (and maybe limit me to baths for now on).
I am not coming out and saying that it is true or explicitly admitting guilt. But I will not contest the evidence. And I would also like to read you the following statement:
As I have acknowledged in the past, I am not perfect. Sometimes, with the warm water and everything, it just seemed like a pretty harmless action. And I actually thought I was being green and environmentally-friendly.
I realize now that I have made some mistakes. I am willing to accept the consequences of my urinary actions.
This whole peeing-in-the-shower situation has taken a toll on me and my entire family, not to mention our housekeeper, and it has been a distraction to the entire family organization.
I am very grateful for the support I have received from the kids that this isn't a irredeemable quality.
Finally, I wish to apologize to anyone I may have disappointed--all of our friends especially those who have had to hear this uncomfortable conversation over casual dinner conversation, my extended family, and my blog readership.
I am glad to have this matter behind me once and for all, and I cannot wait to get back to the urine-free showers I love.
photo: Daniel Loiselle / Getty Images