Friday, July 29, 2011

Game 105 Thread: July 29 vs. D'backs, 7p

Ted Lilly (6-10, 5.08) vs. Josh Collmenter (6-5, 2.74).

You know what you're going to get with Ted Lilly: five or six innings and an insurmountable deficit of runs. You know what you're going to get with Josh Collmenter: that funky-chicken delivery. You know what you're going to get at Dodger Stadium on a Friday night: fireworks. And you know what you're going to get when you use the restroom at a bus station: herpes. So slap on the baseball equivalent of an ass-gasket — low expectations! — and enjoy tonight's game.

155 comments:

Josh S. said...

200,000th Collment!

spank said...

Under!

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Orel's feeling optimistic today!

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Chien-Ming Wang's season ERA is a line.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Now it is 36.00.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

http://t.co/vXDJBBQ

Nostradamus said...

Eerily prescient, as that does seem to be a decent metaphor for the future of this organization.

Jason said...

Furcal - SS
Miles - 3B
Ethier - RF
Kemp - CF
Rivera - LF
Loney - 1B
Navarro - C
Velez - 2B
Lilly - P

Jason said...

Which occurs more tonight: Lilly HR-against or Velez weak ground outs?

Kyle Baker said...

CARLOS MONASTERIOS IS NOT THE SHORT TO MEDIUM TERM FUTURE OF THIS FRANCHISE!

Kyle Baker said...

Let's see - go to grocery store per wife, or sit around and wait for the SoSG Streaking Game thread?

Who's taking the over on that?

spank said...

Who's taking the over/under on a booze thread post by 6pm?

Steve Sax said...

Aha, that explains the herpes.

Steve Sax said...

Dusty, you didn't tell me im going to get in trouble with ms dusty!

MR.F said...

Wotchale! I'm back in my apartment and hope to watch tonight's game!

Kyle Baker said...

I'm extremely confused by the streaking game.

Steve Sax said...

Dodgers Badge #1 tonight: Ted Lilly (Win)

Bwah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Steve Sax said...

Dodgers badge #2 tonight: Urine HR

Bwah ha ha ha ha ha ha (Urine isn't even in the lineup)

Steve Sax said...

Dodgers badge #3: Jamey Carroll double.

Could happen...except he isn't in the starting lineup, either

Way to fuck with the Dodgers fans, mlb!

Kyle Baker said...

(sobs)

Kyle Baker said...

(bawls)

Kyle Baker said...

(dry heaves)

Kyle Baker said...

Blogger time 7 mins different than real time?

Kyle Baker said...

As defined by AT&T

Kyle Baker said...

Phiwwies get Pence? Cause they weren't good enough yet.

Kyle Baker said...

My god that's a shitty lineup.

Jason said...

On the bus, Vinny!

rbnlaw said...

Off the wagon, Vinny!

rbnlaw said...

So, did the Sillies steal Pence? I was never that impressed with the guy, but he is damn fast.

rbnlaw said...

Quiet.


Too quiet.


Something's afoot.

Kyle Baker said...

Whining abt the streaking game, RBN!

Kyle Baker said...

Vinny hasn't pronounced the Dbags pitcher's name twice the same way yet tonight.

Josh S. said...

@Jason 4:40:

Velez flied out, so does Lilly lead 1-0?

rbnlaw said...

If only I understood that whole streaking game.

rbnlaw said...

Coll-menter
Colemn-ter
Col-menter


Tomayto
Toemahto

MR.F said...

Nice piece-o-hitting!

MR.F said...

RETURN OF THE BISON!!!!!!!!!!!!

rbnlaw said...

Juan Rivera: Good job.

Josh S. said...

Does anyone hit homers to center with less effort than Matty?

rbnlaw said...

Loney up with no chance for the GIDP.

Strange.

rbnlaw said...

@Josh: His name was Jimmy Wynn, and I think he's dead.

rbnlaw said...

Lilly with the fielding gem!

rbnlaw said...

That was sarcastic, for those of you not keeping score at home.

rbnlaw said...

Well, Lilly is to blame for Lilly's run because of Lilly's error.

I'm glad they resigned him for, like, 10 years in the off-season.

Alex said...

Oh here's the game thread...

Less go doyers!

Kill Lilly...

rbnlaw said...

Vin loves Roberts' tattoos. He should start a blog about them.

Alex said...

What's Lilly been averaging 5 1/3 innings?

rbnlaw said...

We'd like to welcome those of you just joining the GT from the Streaking Thread, whatever the hell that was. Here, our pitcher is trying to negate the first 3-run homer for the Dodgers this year.

Thanks for joining us, I'm checking out.

#stupidsoftballgame

rbnlaw said...

^;

cc: Dusty

rbnlaw said...

Excuse me. . .swing.

rbnlaw said...

OK peeps, I'm out like Ricky Martin on CNN.

Josh S. said...

Do it again, Matt.

Steve Sax said...

Rancho ardiendo for the Bison, Dodgers up 3-2 with two out in the bottom of the fourth

Steve Sax said...

Sax here has 248 badges, working on his 16th case

Steve Sax said...

Reds win the game in the bottom of the 13th, with Brian Wilson entering and only managing to get one out while walking two and giving up two singles, the latter of which won the game for the Reds, 4-3.

Whoo hoo!

MR.F said...

MARRY ME BISON!!!!

Steve Sax said...

Matt Kemp is a god.

2-RBI single for Matt Kemp!

5 RBI for Kemp tonight, and we're not even halfway through the game

5-2 LA

Josh S. said...

MARRY MR. F, BISON!!!

Steve Sax said...

Even better on the Giants' loss to the Reds tonight: it was off the bat of Edgar Renteria, Giants' WS MVP from last year

Steve Sax said...

gotta watch Brett Gardner pound the bat in frustration, snapping his bat, after he Ks to lose the game to the Orioles. BAL 4, NYY 2

Steve Sax said...

Due up in the fifth for the Dodgers: Loney, Navarro, Velez: The 0-Fers!

MR.F said...

Wow Loney. At least try to have a good at-bat...

Steve Sax said...

James Loney hasn't had a multi-hit game in his last 18 games

Since climbing from the .160s all the way up to .280 June 25, he's spent a month descending in to .257 mediocrity

He's had four extra base hits ALL MONTH

spank said...

I just sneezed something black? on my screen.

Paul said...

Ryan Roberts really runs.

Paul said...

Black? Means good things ahead. Green means losing money and yellow means your an alien.

spank said...

Looks like a tattoo of Peter Criss on that D-Bags neck.

spank said...

If the hot sister was actually pitching I'd feel a whole lot better about this game.

MR.F said...

I grab laundry and I come back and we've given up 2 runs?!

Paul said...

We need Gurreerrrr right hurrrrr.

Steve Sax said...

Spank: it's like the old sailor's adage: black snot at night, SoSG commenters need 409 cleaner for their laptop screen.

Steve Sax said...

@Mr F, what the hell are you doing getting your laundry now?

DAMMIT

Paul said...

Mr. F you can never do laundry again.

Steve Sax said...

5-4 dodgers, two men on in th etop of the sixth, one out and one run already in this inning.

Come on, Guerrier.

Steve Sax said...

hey, that's a good start

Steve Sax said...

that's the fastest I've seen navarro move in weeks

he must have thought it was a piece of peach pie

Paul said...

I can see Mr. C shows up early and runs over to a Red Sox blog quickly.

Steve Sax said...

Mr F, there are two sides to every pair of underwear.

save water, dude (and the Dodgers)

Steve Sax said...

charley just said "the dodgers are 35-4 when leading after six innings"

we haven't gotten to the end of the sixth inning (or at least to the point where we're sure we'll be leading), you idiot

Steve Sax said...

hey, nice job Matty G

Steve Sax said...

NOW we'll be leading after six innings.

however, I still don't feel reassured

Paul said...

Free Mr. F's undergarments!

Paul said...

Okay maybe keep them on Mr. F

spank said...

Mlasf,I mean Miles is batting.

spank said...

Watch out for the backsides of them undergarments. Just saying.

Steve Sax said...

hey, nice bit of basehitting there Andre!

RBI single

6-4 LA

Steve Sax said...

Hmm. I want to beat the Snakes, but if we beat the Snakes, we make it esaier for the Giants.

This is a quandary.

Steve Sax said...

Oh, I forgot: we're making our move up the division. We should just win.

Steve Sax said...

MATT KEMP YOU ARE WORTHLESS WITH THAT GIDP

(except thanks those other five RBIs were clutch.)

Steve Sax said...

Up jumps the Demel, Kemp gidp

Paul said...

The snakes really have no chance without a Giant meltdown.


Josh's team is headed for October baseball.

Steve Sax said...

MATT KEMP, YOU ARE NOT WORTHLESS WITH PLAYS LIKE THAT IN CENTER FIELD

spank said...

MATT FUCKING KEMP!!!

Steve Sax said...

"Has a ballplayer ever come of age like Matt Kemp?" -- Vin Scully

Steve Sax said...

252 badges

I feel like the black symbiotic suit of Spider-Man

Paul said...

Why don't we retire #55?

Steve Sax said...

100

Steve Sax said...

DAMMIT

Steve Sax said...

@Paul: Yeah, Russell Martin was awesome for a while

spank said...

Giving it up.

MR.F said...

Fiddlesticks.

Steve Sax said...

That was indeed a bomb by Upton there.

6-5 Dodgers, two out in the seventh

make that three

Steve Sax said...

bring on the seventh inning stretch

spank said...

Goddamn Urine you suck!

I know that was Rivera batting but I needed to call someone Urine.

Paul said...

Thanks Sax. I wanted someone to hit that hanging curveball out.

Re: #55

Steve Sax said...

FJL gets a one-out single. Wow.

Paul said...

Dinner strikes fear in the heart of Gibson.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

With Monasterios out, this whole season is dead to me.

Steve Sax said...

With Dioner and Uribe in, this whole season is dead to me.

Steve Sax said...

With Dioner and Uribe in, this whole post-game team spread is decimated.

Josh S. said...

Confundus charm.

Steve Sax said...

7-5 dodgers, one out, two RISP and Ackbar up

spank said...

Don't let it be a trap,Fucker!

Steve Sax said...

Upton's throw wasn't even CLOSE to the zip code of the plate

Steve Sax said...

Vin Scully is not a fan of Justin Upton's fielding

Raffy with a double to score Gwynn!

9-5 Dodgers

spank said...

Navarro ran home on that flyout as if someone rang the dinner bell.

Josh S. said...

The root is on!

Steve Sax said...

"...and the route is on!" (Vin Scully, as interpreted by Dusty)

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

See that, Frisco? Cannon for an arm, strong bat, fleet feet, Furcal's got it all, and he can be all yours IF the price is right!

Josh S. said...

Vin had a point about Upton, but I don't know how it would have been possible to catch that ball "on the dead run."

The throw was shit, though.

Steve Sax said...

in between innings, i'm trying to do the last puzzle of this

http://jayisgames.com/archives/2011/07/you_are_games_letters_in_boxes_9_humble_indie_bundle_edition.php

Josh S. said...

^ The sac fly ball, I mean.

Steve Sax said...

only 35K paid attendance on a friday fireworks night. ouch.

Steve Sax said...

somebody send a APB out for Dusty Baker. I've looked here under the bar and he's not there.

Steve Sax said...

MacDougal with a smooth 8th

Josh S. said...

He mad atchoo, Sax.

An maybe at me too.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

I'm still mad at Sax. But then again, I'm always mad at Sax.

DC RULEZ.

spank said...

Being mad at Saxy was so last year.

Paul said...

Boooooze status: Oh crap wrong site.

spank said...

Mattingly ain't fucking around no' mo'. Guerra coming in to pitch the ninth up by 4.

Josh S. said...

They sure don't rule 2011 movies, MLASC.

Paul said...

The Dodger kids backpack is shaped like Urine's head.

spank said...

'

^ Cc: White Chocolate

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

What are you talking about, Josh? Green Lantern: Emerald Knights was great!

Who is this Ryan Reynolds you speak of?

Josh S. said...

Random thought: Perhaps Dodger Stadium should retire "Kickstart My Heart" out of respect for Jansen.

Josh S. said...

I need to see that DVD, actually.

Paul said...

When does Aquaman get a movie?

Paul said...

I lost Vinny!!

Steve Sax said...

technical difficulties? what the fuck, fox sports west?

Josh S. said...

Blanco is one seedy-lookin' muhfugger.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

@Paul - When Entourage reflects reality. Which is never.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Stoopid Warner Bros. sucks at making anything DC-related.

If I ever meet David E. Kelly, I'm giving him a swift kick in the ass.

Paul said...

Aquaman the Movie! Who is that dude's arch nemisis?

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

*David E. Kelley

Paul said...

I remember when I was a kid I really thought people in bars looked like they did in beer commercials.

Paul said...

How come I have this weird feeling if Guerra was closing games that mattered he would start to suck.

spank said...

Hit him in the head!!

Paul said...

We make potty!!

spank said...

*runs around with Mr.F's underwear on his head*

Pistol Pete Reiser said...

I hate how the At Bat 11 app shuts down the audio feed so quickly after a game.

Steve Sax said...

Kemp is so within himself and yet so amazing, even on the post-game interview he's awesome.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Shit, when did Philly get Hunter Pence?

Steve Sax said...

PGT up. Go get yourself checked for herpes.

Steve Sax said...

@PPR 10:48p: totally agree with you on the at bat radio feed. it used to be that they'd let it go on for hours afterward; you could hear the post-game show with ken and josh and then roll right into kabc programming. (sigh)

rbnlaw said...

I'm not sure what a "d" is.