Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Game 98 Thread: July 20 @ Giants, 12:30p

Clayton Kershaw (10-4, 2.88) vs. Tim Lincecum (8-7, 2.99).

Dammit, I'm running out of ways to say WE SUCK. The Giants go for the series sweep in a lunchtime special today, and it figures to be a pitchers' duel. The Dodger bats figure to score fewer runs than can fit in a breadbox, the Dodgers figure to take a depressingly quiet charter home, and Dodger fans figure to contemplate new methods of ritual disembowelment. Happy Wednesday!

105 comments:

Steve Sax said...

I should have written the PGT for yesterday's game, but yeah this just about sums it up well.

I'll be watching, nonetheless.

Dusty Baker said...

(installs new Mac OS)

Mr. Customer said...

Stupid, soul-sucking, terrible Dodgers...

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

I HATE BOTH OF THESE TEAMS.

Fernie V said...

It has been a while since I upgraded DB, what am I missing.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

This Ingram guy Bill Shaikin tweets about sounds like a real jackass.

Central Valley Fan said...

Atleast we can embrace the suck earlier in the day...

Spank said...

We got this!

(cries)

Jason said...

Hooray! I get to get today's punishment out of the way early. Leaves more time for soul-restoring boozing. Prepare yourselves, Seattle bars. Happy hour will be mine.

Pistol Pete Reiser said...

We'll win this one. I swear!

(drinking Cool-Aid)

Josh S. said...

Wij zuigen
Nous suçons
Wir saugen
Απορροφάμε
Succhiamo
私達は吸う
우리는 빤다
Nós sugamos
Мы всасываем
Aspiramos

(Babelfish'd)

Josh S. said...

Pentland must be pissed. The last hitting coach of an offensively inept Dodger team got a PROMOTION.

Jason said...

Jeff Pentland was fired as hitting coach last night. Dave Hansen is taking over for the rest of the year.

Mr. Customer said...

Who will be the next scapegoat, then?

Mr. Customer said...

I can't bear to watch.

Steve Sax said...

In case you're wondering:

Gwynn LF
Furcal SS
Ethier RF
Kemp CF
Rivera 1B
Navarro C
Urine 3B
Carroll 2B
Kershaw P

Steve Sax said...

We should at least swap the second and sixth spots to spell "FUCK" at the bottom, which is where we are

Josh S. said...

I think I've yelled "Gfekrnuck!" once or twice this season.

Josh S. said...

WE'RE SELLING!

Problem is, we're selling crap.

Steve Sax said...

I want to get my Kershaw badge today, dammit (7 Ks)

Josh S. said...

Yep, the market for Mr. First-Pitch-GIDP is gonna be SCORCHING.

Steve Sax said...

Clayton: 2 Ks in the first

Steve Sax said...

Cin 3, Pit 1: no badges earned

Steve Sax said...

End of the second inning for the Dodgers goes like this:

Navarro coaxes a 10-pitch, one-out walk off of Lincecum. And then Urine comes up and ON THE FIRST PITCH GIDPs.

Brilliant, Urine, you piece of crap

Fred's Brim said...

I liked the list of For Sale players they had on MLBTR. The only guy I would miss for even an instant would be Hiro, but I would miss him anyway because this team will drive him straight to retirment, or suicide

Jason said...

Pentland told Dylan Hernandez that he believes it was Frank's call to fire him.

Keep calm and blame Frank, indeed.

Steve Sax said...

MIN 7, CLE 5. Nick Blackburn does not get the win for the Twins, but his seven-K performance earns him the 6K badge. Whoo hoo!

Steve Sax said...

Dempster fell one K short of his badge. Oh, and his Cubs are losing 8-0 in the sixth.

Jason said...

At a glance, Brandon Crawford looks like Ethier at the plate.

And Navarro's throws look like he should be on the disabled list with a case of the yips. Long live A.J. Ellis!

Steve Sax said...

that makes TWO throwing errors by Navarro this game, allowing TWO runners to advance to third

Navarro you fat piece of crap. Go join Urine.

Jason said...

This Kershaw kid is a pretty good pitcher. Maybe the Dodgers should sign him long-term?

Steve Sax said...

Kershaw escapes another Navarro-inflicted jam.

Clayton gets another K in the second inning. He has three and is almost halfway to his badge.

Jason said...

If Navarro joins Uribe on even a modest-sized boat, we would have the literal embodiment of the term "sunk cost."

Steve Sax said...

@Jason: nah, let's sign Juan Uribe to three years instead of giving Kershaw a long-term deal.

And hey, let's get Juan Rivera, too!

And Juan Castro!

And pay for Juan Pierre!

And drink Juan Valdez coffee!

Steve Sax said...

@Jason and Josh S: you both have awesome comments this game (11:59a and 1:19p, respectfully). This is going to be a tough call.

Jason said...

I want to see Kershaw take Timmah deep right here.

Jason said...

Eh, Kershaw is still pretty good.

Josh S. said...

FUCK YOU FIREWALL, I WANT MY KERSHAW BADGE.

Josh S. said...

Weird. The Kershaw badge is checked off, but he only has three.

Steve Sax said...

that's strange, I already got the Kershaw badge, even though he only has three Ks so far.

It's already in my case.

Whoo hoo! I'll take it!

Steve Sax said...

Josh S: We make Kershaw badge party!

Steve Sax said...

it's only the third inning and Ethier has 3 LOB already

Jason said...

The vendor in the stands behind home plate has the number 42 on the back of his garishly orange shirt.

Steve Sax said...

Clayton's got 5 Ks through three innings.

Dodgers aren't losing yet, 0-0.

Jason said...

Uribe: still sucks

Jason said...

Carroll really showing the gritty hustle he is so known for there. I need booze. A lot of booze.

Steve Sax said...

we will never score

Fred's Brim said...

that sounds like as conversation I had with my friends in High School

this is much more pathetic

Steve Sax said...

Question: if a .173 hitter who has already gotten his hit this game comes to the plate, does he get another hit?

Jason said...

Answer: Only if Timmah washed his hair between innings. So, no.

Jason said...

Pitching to Kemp here would be the dumbest possible thing the Giants could do.

Jason said...

DAMMIT!

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

This is going rather well.

Dusty Baker said...

Wash yer hair, Timmeh!!!

Steve Sax said...

yeah, that inning ended up about as planned.

furcal grounds out
ethier doubles (surprise!)
but kemp Ks
and rivera Ks

sigh

Dusty Baker said...

re: badges

Urine to get two hits? Riiiiiiiight. It must take a special kind of asshole to sit around and develop the badge criteria for the day.

Dusty Baker said...

Kid K Badge! YES!!!!

This will likely be the high point in my day. 2:19pm - mark it.

Jason said...

I still didn't get the Kershaw badge. It's like the universe is just baiting me at this point.

Steve Sax said...

Clayton strikes out the side in the sixth. He's got nine Ks.

Unfortunately the Dodgers are not doing anything from the plate to support him.

Fire Dave Hansen!

Jason said...

Wha?!?

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

WHAT. THE. FUCK.

Jason said...

And the universe corrects itself.

Pistol Pete Reiser said...

Giant fan verbal assault incoming...

Jason said...

I'm going to suggest that giving up the second out to move Carroll to second with Gwynn due up is not an improvement on letting Kershaw swing away.

Jason said...

Yup

Neeebs said...

@Sax (1.17)

Does that make things any better?

Alex said...

Kershaw in 2012

Josh S. said...

Dioner made a splash, but was disappointed that it wasn't into a bowl of chili.

Steve Sax said...

@Neeebs 2:30p: Yes, it does.

Navarro, you can come out of the dining room where Urine has firmly posted himself.

What? You don't want to leave the dining room?

Steve Sax said...

that is the only run that Kershaw will get to work with this game, btw

Jason said...

When did Tony LaRussa start managing the Giants?

Jason said...

KFP was holding that can of dip like he was trying to hear the ocean in a conch shell.

Neeebs said...

@Sax:

Can you tell Uribe/Navarro to leave me some of that turkey at the corner of your table? I hope there is some left on the carcas.

Jason said...

Item one on Hansen's to-do list: introduce the Dodgers hitters to the slider and how to lay off it.

Josh S. said...

Damn. Krampus Jr. is doing his job.

Dusty Baker said...

(fails at new OS install)


(has bad HD)


(cries)

Dusty Baker said...

Item .5 on Hansen's to-do list: introduce the Dodgers hitters to a bat and how to swing it.

Steve Sax said...

that was a thoroughly unsatisfying end to a two-on, none-out "threat"

Steve Sax said...

@Neeebs 2:53p: but Uribe *IS* the turkey

Dusty Baker said...

KKKKKKKKKK

Dusty Baker said...

KKKKKKKKKKK

Dusty Baker said...

KKKKKKKKKKKK

Neeebs said...

@Sax: insert dark meat comment here.

Dusty Baker said...

(inserts dark meat)

Fred's Brim said...

These assholes are going to barf this win down the drain aren't they?

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Quick, someone score Carroll from second before he's traded!

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Maybe Pentland sucked at teaching batters to bunt. Donnie loves his bunting.

Fred's Brim said...

look at those cnuts due up in the bottom of the 9th. They would hit three straight homers if they would be allowed to bat after the second one

Fred's Brim said...

wow, Dre was playing second CF there

Fred's Brim said...

two rips, two outs

Mr. Customer said...

I told myself I wasn't going to watch. What the hell is wrong with me?

Fred's Brim said...

Mr C I've been telling myself that all season

Neeebs said...

Javy, Javy, Javy.

*dances the Javy Nagila around his desk*

Josh S. said...

FUCK YEAH!

Jason said...

Well, that was pleasantly unexpected.

Fred's Brim said...

Guerra K's Lizard Lips

Clayton wins, Dodgers still lose

Mr. Customer said...

I will fucking TAKE it!

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

We...win?

Fred's Brim said...

wait, we didn't lose?

Steve Sax said...

holy shit we won a game

Mr. Customer said...

Now I can go back to being infuriated following the bankruptcy hearing on twitter...I mean go back to work. Yeah. Work.

Steve Sax said...

PGT up!

Giants down!

We make parrty!

Steve Sax said...

too many r's there!

Neeebs said...

Actually, to my eyes, you are still missing one "r."

Steve Sax said...

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee