Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Newest Stow Suspects (Allegedly) Split Skull, Split Parking Lot, and Now Split Hairs

Louie Sanchez and Marvin Norwood have been charged with three felonies in connection with the attack on Giants fan Bryan Stow, following their alleged assault on Stow in the Dodger Stadium parking lot on Opening Day. But wait, says their attorney, it's not all that bad (emphasis mine):

Police captain Andrew Smith said Monday that the department is still investigating because others possibly were victimized. The official said police believe there were three victims besides Stow.

"We're trying to find out if there are any other victims, anyone in the parking lot, anyone along the third-base line," Smith said following a scheduled press conference with LAPD chief Charlie Beck was canceled.

Smith added that police believe Sanchez and Norwood watched the game from seats along the third-base line. Stow, who remains hospitalized with a brain injury, watched the game from the outfield bleachers. The attack of the 42-year-old paramedic from Santa Cruz occurred near a taxi stand in a dimly lit lot after the game. [...]

Outside the courthouse, [District Attorney spokeswoman Sandi] Gibbons clarified the mayhem charge against both men, which reads that the defendants "unlawfully and maliciously deprive Bryan Stow of a member of the body and did disable, disfigure and render it useless and did cut and disable the tongue, and put out an eye and slit the nose, ear and lip of said person."

Gibbons said that "doesn't mean anyone lost an eye or had their tongue cut off. ... It means that the victim sufferend very serious injuries, injuries that would disfigure or impair."

Oh, it's just disfigurement and impairment! Never mind the brain damage and coma. Well, that clears up everything. I feel much better now.


Pistol Pete Reiser said...

I wonder when/if Myles Berman is following this. Maybe considering a tagline change...