Wednesday, March 14, 2007

The Hot Opening Day Ticket

If you find yourself in Tampa, and Jai Alai's not your bag, reach into your coin purse and bust out an Abe Lincoln for 4 Premium Tampa Bay Devil Rays tickets. Boasting a league worse 1-12 Spring Training Record, the D Rays are poised for another breakout season. Your kids will love frolicking with T Bay's economical mascot RAYMOND (who as you can see, is a much nicer sting ray than one who stabbed Steve Irwin in the heart). Their $35 Million Payroll (which dwarves the Marlins $3.25 per inning rates) ensures that former Dodgers Jae Seo, Hee-Seop Choi and Dioner Navarro will actually be paid fairly for their "services". So come to Tropicana Stadium on opening day, the one game all year when the Devil Rays are fighting for 1st place.


Steve Sax said...

Bidding is now at $31--you almost have to break out TWO Andrew Jacksons!

Plus, there's a little bit of ambiguity on this auction. Headline says it's for four tickets, but auction details say it's for 2 seats.

Caveat emptor (which is written on the back of every Devil Rays ticket, by the way).

Delino DeShields, Sr said...

Clearly the SoSG readership is driving up sales. The truth is that (ripping off mask) the tickets are actually mine! (maniacal laugh) I'm gonna be rich, rich I tells ya!