Thursday, August 02, 2007

Sports Illustrated Cliff's Notes, Part 1

When I was in college, a good friend of mine wrote this pithy one-line synopsis of The Crying Game: "Small breasts...whoa! She has a penis!"

I don't think I can match that brilliance.

But for those of you that don't want to spend the $3 to buy Sports Illustrated, let me offer this Cliff's Notes version to the cover story of the latest issue (which, during the middle of baseball season, is about NFL football, for some inexplicable reason):

  • Pro football involves big hits.
  • Hitting players love them. Hit players often can't remember them.
  • Fans love them, so screw the risks (which are not covered in detail in this article).

And there you have it. No need to shell out three sheckles. Thanks for the in-depth (and hard-hitting?) journalism, Tim Layden!


Orel said...

Hey, I enjoyed that article!

Eric Karros said...

So did I. Look up on youtube Reggie Bush crawling around helplessly after getting clocked or Chad Johnson's incoherent post game interview. Scary stuff.

Rob said...

Many years ago, when the Internet was newfangled and Not So Full of Spam, the Great Leader Kibo proclaimed his Manifesto. The gag about The Crying Game ranks as the funniest line in there.

Steve Sax said...

Okay, I remember the Reggie Bush hit too. But if Layden is going to skirt around all the key issues (health risks to players, societal implications of cheering on violent sport a la UFC, etc.), and instead focus on six step-by-step recaps of "big hits", then what is the purpose of the piece again?

I found it ironic that he was swiping Tom Jackson and ESPN's "Jacked Up" segment, when at core the article was basically a print version of exactly the same thing.