Monday, August 22, 2011

The Assassins' Circle, Kill Thread 6

It's come down to Marla vs Spank in an old-fashioned gunfight at high noon. To revisit the tiebreaker rules:

  • Instead of the usual 3pm cutoff time, the game will be at noon (a comment at 12:00pm is ok, at 12:01 is too late)
  • No initiator - either player can kill the other, so whoever comments 2nd, so long as it's at 12:00 noon or sooner, wins.
  • The only way it ends in a tie is if neither player comments by noon, in which case we reset for Tuesday.

Good luck to each.

Side conversation thread here.

98 comments:

Dusty Baker said...

(ducks behind an old wagon, peeps around wheel)

Dusty Baker said...

(pulls shades)

Dusty Baker said...

(jumps into an empty barrel and pulls the top closed)

Eric Karros said...

(seals barrel shut and kicks it down hill)

Steve Sax said...

(constructs ACME giant rubber-band barrier at bottom of hill, propelling Dusty back up)

Dusty Baker said...

(pokes ironic sign out from hole in barrel indicating realization of the force of gravity)

rbnlaw said...

(puts "Open" sign in the window of the undertaker's shop)
(whistles whilst walking through the graveyard)
(checks watch)

Fernie V said...

(Straps barrel to a rocket and Lights the rocket )

Dusty Baker said...

I'm that lone old codger left in the saloon who is hunched over his whisky, back to the saloon doors, seemingly ignorant of the carnage about to ensue.

Neeebs said...

I'm a tumbleweed.

Dusty Baker said...

^ Wait, wrong thread. My most recent comment was meant for the Game Thread.

Mr. Customer said...

*takes shelter in the whorehouse*

QuadSevens said...

*continues to play poker and drink whiskey*

Paul said...

(smokes opium and aims gun at the sun)

Josh S. said...

(makes fun of Clint Eastwood's "Nee-kay" shoes)

Mr. Customer said...

I don't think any of the above comments are too far out-of-character to be plausible.

MR.F said...

(asks Clint Eastwood for hat advice)

Eric Karros said...

Side game for the dead while we wait for high noon:

First one to gun down Dusty (i.e., comment immediately after his next comment) wins.

Neeebs said...

@MC: I guess I COULD be a tumbleweed.

Neeebs said...

(cups hands together and makes a wind/whistle sounds)

Dusty Baker said...

The Good: Karina

The Bad: Spanky

The Ugly: EK

(prepares to die)

Josh S. said...

Boom?

Dusty Baker said...

I never thought it would be you, Josh!

(haunts Josh)

Josh S. said...

I only had no qualms about killing you because you were already dead.

(fashions a bulletproof vest from an iron furnace door)

Dusty Baker said...

(dies)

Jason said...

(raises bet against Quad at poker, shoots more whiskey)

Eric Karros said...

Nice shot Josh.

Still 30 minutes 'til showtime. Shoulda booked an opening band or something.

Dusty Baker said...

(sings Old Gray Mare with pants down)

Eric Karros said...

(debating whether to play conflicting edits spoiler)

Jason said...

(pants EK)

Josh S. said...

(sings "My Little Buttercup")

Jason said...

(peruses coffins at rbn's shop)

Dusty Baker said...

(gathers up women and children)

Dusty Baker said...

(checks pocket watch again)

Dusty Baker said...

(hears distant jangling of spurs)

Keven C said...

(places bet on Marla victory by suicide)

Dusty Baker said...

(can't find sheriff)

Jason said...

Shootout in 3..2..1..

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Boom.

Spank Horst said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OJI6g3BPb0Y&list=FLZ1sN3o95H0GkqRkPZLkhiQ&index=40

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Josh S. said...

OH SNAP!

Dusty Baker said...

Marla!

Keven C said...

YES!!! Cash my ticket!

Jason said...

Suicide, eh?

Spank Horst said...

millifucking seconds!

Dusty Baker said...

Spank tried to get cute.

Dusty Baker said...

That wasn't suicide. Spank did show up, albeit mis-timed.

Spank Horst said...

Now i can go take a dump.

Josh S. said...

So it DID end up being he who shoots first wins!

I'm happy.

Dusty Baker said...

I think you just did, Spank. On my dreams for your winning the AC.

Jason said...

Spank was held up delivering that telegram for Mr. Mongo.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

It was a candygram.

Keven C said...

Good game, gentlemen. Back to lurking...

Dusty Baker said...

Landshark!

Dusty Baker said...

See you next year, Keven C!

Eric Karros said...

Spank's synchronization apparati was off.

Well done MLASC.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

I demand Smonk for a prize.

Dusty Baker said...

On behalf of Mr. F:

(cries)

Dusty Baker said...

Let's get back to this one (gestures with head toward the baseball field).

Spank Horst said...

I blame Loney for my loss.

Spank Horst said...

Just realized this is my second SoSG Finals appearance in a row. Should be worth a 40oz. of Steel Reserve at least.

Dusty Baker said...

We should organize these into a season. Each major event is like a Grand Slam event (AC, March Madness, etc.) We can get someone like AIG to sponsor.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

SMOOOOOOOOONK

rbnlaw said...

"I think he said the sheriff is nearer."

Tough luck, Spank. I did call the inevitable Marla victory. Well played.

MR.F said...

Smonk is mine!

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

(cries)

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

I'm gonna milk this for everything it's got.

Mr. LA Assasssins Czar said...

FUCK YEAH.

Eric Karros said...

I guess these would be the 4 Majors in the SoSG year:

AC
March Madness
Puzzle Champion
Be My Broheim

I don't see anyone achieving the Grand Slam sweep given that ubragg has a locks up the Puzzles and doesn't participate in the other events.

Eric Karros said...

Mr C might be the best hope for a GS sweep, but still pretty distant odds.

Dusty Baker said...

Make Puzzle Series its own separate thing. Add the cars game.

Steve Sax said...

EK, we need a game a month.

MR.F said...

Connect 4?

Dusty Baker said...

Add Connect 4, lose Broheim.

Broheim would be like the TPC in golf: important, but not a major.

Eric Karros said...

Sax, to me that'd be like having the World Cup every 6 months.

Eric Karros said...

But Connect 4 is a collective competition w/o an individual champ...

Eric Karros said...

And BTW, you read that right - I just compared Assassins' Circle to the World Cup.

Mr. Customer said...

Connect 4 is more of a Ryder Cup sort of deal.

Eric Karros said...

Ah, well put Mr C.

Mr. Customer said...

Oh, and don't think I'm gonna forget that PCS slight. I've beaten ubragg in a half-season, I'll get him sooner or later...As long as I don't get boned with recurring meeting scheduling like I had this year.

Dusty Baker said...

Here's hoping you don't get boned, then, Mr. C.

Spank Horst said...

SoSG Grand Slam

1. March Madness (March)
2. Racing game (May)
3. AC (August)
4. ? (October during playoffs)

Dusty Baker said...

What are these strange "playoffs" of which you speak, Spank?

Mr. Customer said...

Hey, the Masters is snooty and exclusive, too, but they still include it. PCS has got to be in.

Jason said...

October is Connect-4.

What about the My Broheim alternate that never was?

Eric Karros said...

Jason,

"The Gauntlet" has been re-named "3 O'Clock Chicken" - it's in the latter stages of development but hasn't yet been greenlit...

Dusty Baker said...

(fleeces some Greeks to obtain funding to finish CHICKEN project development)

Mr. Customer said...

I fear the Greeks, even when they bear venture capital.

Mr. Customer said...

*slays Patroclus*

Paul said...

You guys are too funny. Or maybe that is the opium talking.

QuadSevens said...

(after hours of deliberation, I finally call Jason's raise)

Jason said...

(turns over a pair of 8s, curses crappy bluff, drinks more whiskey)

MR.F said...

Don't worry Jason, you're not playing poker, you're playing Crazy 8's!!

QuadSevens said...

(stacks red, white, and blue colored chips)

What!?! Crazy 8's?!?

(aims his gun at the dealer)

Jason said...

Well, I am headed to Vegas this weekend.

(makes note to hit Crazy 8s table)

Spank Horst said...

(steals Paul's opium)