Thursday, April 14, 2011

Game 13 Thread: April 14 vs. Cards, 7p

"I miss my BFF Trevor Ariza!"


"I'm actually a Rockets fan!"

Hiroki Kuroda (2-0, 1.72) vs. Jaime Garcia (1-0, 0.60).

Pity the poor Dodgers promotions department. They include beer in their half-price food & drink promotion, then have to pull it following the Bryan Stow incident. Tonight is Purple and Gold LA Cap Night at Dodger Stadium, and it comes on the heels of Kobe Bryant's $100,000 fine for using homophobic language. What's next — people start discovering smallpox in their Dodgers Snuggies?

Fortunately, the team is bringing in some famous figures to class up the joint tonight:

NBA Hall of Famers Kareem Abdul Jabbar and Bill Sharman, who also played in the Dodgers’ minor league system in the 1950s, will throw out a ceremonial first pitch. Long-time Lakers anthem singer and good luck charm Jeffrey Osborne will perform the National Anthem and God Bless America.

Will the Laker luck Stay With Us Tonight? Will Matt Kemp hit a ball that will be carried out of Dodger Stadium On the Wings of Love? Will the Dodgers get some Woo Woo wood on the ball? If not, Don't You Get So Mad.

294 comments:

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Josh S. said...

Carroll SS
Blake 3B
Ethier RF
Kemp CF
Uribe 2B
Loney 1B
Hoffmann LF
Ellis C
Kuroda P

Hooooo boy.

rbnlaw said...

Is it too early to give up hope? On the bright side, the Gnat bats looked as anemic as ours this week.

Or should I say, "weak."


Where's my beer?

Fred's Brim said...

The Flyers: the Phillies of the NHL

Dusty Baker said...

Hoooooo boy. Kareem may be the biggest offensive threat on the field tonight.


(obligatory tears)

MR.F said...

Oy..

No Hope For Loney said...

Maybe Kareem can play center for the Lakers.

(cries)

Fred's Brim said...

Tulo finished doing dirty things to the Mets' backside this week: 10-16, 4 HR (one in each game), 8 RBI, 4 BB

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

What's the Dodgers' record when a Laker throws out the first pitch? I'm sure someone could find out...

karina said...

Epale,everyone!

karina said...

btw, I want to say I wasn't offended and/or angry last night.My eyes were tired and irritated ad I couldn't stand being in front of the computer.

I still sustain Patti Smith rocks ;)

Josh S. said...

I FINALLY HAVE BADGES!

Fred's Brim said...

Sabres-Flyers 0-0 after 2

karina said...

@Josh "once you get badged,you never go back"

MR.F said...

Epale, Karina!

Wotcher, everyone!

Josh S. said...

Wotchale!

Mr. Customer said...

Howdy, fellow inmates!

Steve Dittmore said...

I'm making a rare appearance in the thread tonight, mainly because I can watch the Cards feed tonight on my cable.

Where is DeJesus?

karina said...

wow, getting a badge from Johnny Damon's walk-off HR was exciting :)

karen said...

Hello, Everyone!!

karina said...

Professor, it's a pleasure you join us tonight!

karen said...

Karina--Who are the people in your avatar?

Steve Dittmore said...

thanks Karina...

Does anyone realize that Andy LaRoche is hitting .368 as starting 3B for Oakland?

Mr. Customer said...

In not really crying over LaRoche, since he's had his ups and downs. I never trusted his bubble-gum-and-duct-tape back, but I say good for him!

Steve Dittmore said...

I agree Mr. C re: LaRoche, but compared to Uribe...

Mr. Customer said...

Sadly, I think the comparison is not favorable with a lot of other 3Bs.

Paul said...

Moma take this badge off me. I can't use it anymore...

karen said...

Okay, Matty. Table is set.

No Hope For Loney said...

We got something a brewin'

No Hope For Loney said...

It's gotta be the cap.

Mr. Customer said...

Runs! Now we brave the desolation that is the bottom of the order.

MR.F said...

Good piece-o-hitting!

Orel said...

RA!

Mr. Customer said...

James, now would be a GREAT time to figure your shit out.

karen said...

Bases loaded. C'mon King James, it's time to make your move!!

Mr. Customer said...

@orel

Rheumatoid arthritis or the Egyptian deity?

Steve Dittmore said...

Cardinal announcers talking about Dodgers "decent" players on DL. First person mentioned was Jay Gibbons. *smh*

Mr. Customer said...

Le sigh.

MR.F said...

Loney still sucks.

No Hope For Loney said...

I've got no words for Loney.

No Hope For Loney said...

wasteWasteWASTE!!!

Mr. Customer said...

One run is better than a kick in the ass, but just.

MR.F said...

It's okay. Your screenname and avatar make up for it.

NicJ said...

Loney is garbage.

Steve Dittmore said...

So, if Thames can play 1B, and if he mashes lefties, why is he not there tonight?

Orel said...

Resident adviser.

Mr. Customer said...

Thames is busted up, Ditty.

Mr. Customer said...

Hence, Hoffman.

Steve Dittmore said...

Thanks Mr. C... had not seen that

Mr. Customer said...

I do not recall the details. A leg thing, iirc

Mr. Customer said...

A pop-up here would be helpful.

Mr. Customer said...

Or not.

No Hope For Loney said...

Not a pop up,Mr.C.

Fred's Brim said...

stupid wild pitch - that shit is unacceptable

Mr. Customer said...

Well, this familiar, at least.

Fred's Brim said...

Loney, did you see what happened there, that sacrifice fly? That's when you hit a fly ball and a runner advances on the play. Remember that for next time

No Hope For Loney said...

Getting no runs with the bases loaded is going to bite us in the ass.

NicJ said...

Lucky for us Loney hit that bases clearing double or we would be losing right now.

#denial

Fred's Brim said...

by some miracle of tv nature, they are showing the Dodger game on tv, the PT version with Vinny!

Steve Sax said...

Darn it, we are losing

Fred's Brim said...

go sabres

Fred's Brim said...

our pitcher have the best patience in our lineup

MR.F said...

I'll take it.

Fred's Brim said...

^has

what is wrong with me tonight?

Fred's Brim said...

that was Jamey Carroll home run power

No Hope For Loney said...

I thought I saw Stu Nahan sitting behind homeplate

No Hope For Loney said...

Get a hit,Dre.I'll degrease your hair.

Fred's Brim said...

Aubrey Huff would have rolled over that and lost it in his shirt

Fred's Brim said...

just a single

Mr. Customer said...

Fucking hell!

MR.F said...

Yay Beard.
=( Ethier.

No Hope For Loney said...

That's clutch.

karen said...

5 runners LOB through 2 innings. We may pay for that in the end.

Behave Spanky.

MR.F said...

Nice play, A.J.

Fred's Brim said...

Nice work, AJ

Fred's Brim said...

eff you Theriot and your stupid bat

Fred's Brim said...

WASH YER HAIR COLBY!

Mr. Customer said...

I'm starting to become annoyed.

NicJ said...

Is it because he got the new deal?

karen said...

Sooo close, Matt.

Fred's Brim said...

crap

I hope Matty didn't hurt himself

No Hope For Loney said...

damn

No Hope For Loney said...

Pulgas.

Mr. Customer said...

Nuuuuuut-Shot!

Fred's Brim said...

Did Dusty wear his snuggie to the game?

Fred's Brim said...

Donny with some gamesmanship?

Josh S. said...

Ah, I see we're the losing losers who lose again.

No Hope For Loney said...

shiznit

Fred's Brim said...

goddamit

Fred's Brim said...

It'll be hard to win if things aren't breaking right for us

Fred's Brim said...

that was funny to see Berkman running hard

Fred's Brim said...

ok, time to be more positive. I will only cheer the good Dodger plays and badmouth our opponents where appropriate

Fred's Brim said...

Colby Rasmus has Nick Nolte mugshot hair

MR.F said...

Sounds good, FB.

No Hope For Loney said...

Fuck Talladega

karen said...

We get down by more than one and I start to feel hopeless.

karen said...

Nice shot , Matty.

I'm going to try to be more positive, too, FB.

Fred's Brim said...

we're gonna start hitting, I am sure of it. Loney and Uribe won't hit .150 all season

No Hope For Loney said...

@ karen

That's because we have not had any come back wins yet,I believe.

Fred's Brim said...

i like it, karen!

Fred's Brim said...

Yadier has silly neck tattoos

No Hope For Loney said...

Just a base hit is all we need. Come on Urine.

Fred's Brim said...

and Matty is fast!

Mr. Customer said...

Matt Kemp is good at baseball again.

Mr. Customer said...

Whoa! What have we here?

Fred's Brim said...

and no more Urine for me. It's Juanny from now on

karen said...

All of our postitive energy is working!

No Hope For Loney said...

URINE!

Fred's Brim said...

attaboy Jaunny!!

MR.F said...

At least Kemp is owning.

No Hope For Loney said...

*silence*

Fred's Brim said...

good job, James, way to get the guy over

Josh S. said...

Is Loney hurt or something?

He swung like a madman and the ball went 2 feet.

karen said...

That curve didn't look like a strike from here.

Steve Dittmore said...

I turn the TV to local news because a tornado warning is in my area, and we score. I turn back and Hoffmann grounds out.

Once again, I have become Schleprock.

Orel said...

Why are the Dodgers running men on third on all grounders?

Josh S. said...

That was kinda ugly.

No Hope For Loney said...

That was a horrible decision.

Fred's Brim said...

oops

Fred's Brim said...

I had to look up Schleprock - i had never seen him before!

wowsie wowsie woo woo

Fred's Brim said...

cmon AJ, get into one!

Fred's Brim said...

HOLY SHIT THAT IS A GIANT BUBBLE!!!

No Hope For Loney said...

They attacked Kershaw's bubble. What has society come to.

Fred's Brim said...

somebody popped it!

Fred's Brim said...

that was awesome

Fred's Brim said...

that's ok - you hit it hard, AJ. Next time it's yours

Fred's Brim said...

ok Hiro, we want a 0 here

Fred's Brim said...

what the hell was that?
that'll tear an oblique

No Hope For Loney said...

Someone tilted the field.

Fred's Brim said...

we are not lucky tonight

No Hope For Loney said...

I knew fucking Theriot was going to get a hit. Just knew it.

No Hope For Loney said...

At least we got away with minimal damage.

Fred's Brim said...

Theriot's terrible and that season will bear that out

MR.F said...

Theriot? Really?

Fred's Brim said...

time to get him now that he's hurt

keep taking, Hiro

Fred's Brim said...

take two more

No Hope For Loney said...

OHH Black Betty Bam ma lamm

No Hope For Loney said...

Start a rally,Ackbar

Fred's Brim said...

that's not a strike, blue

Fred's Brim said...

attaboy, Jamey!

Cmon Casey, make up for the top of the inning

karen said...

Make up for the error, Casey!

Fred's Brim said...

Jamey sneaks to 2nd!

Steve Dittmore said...

Let me see if I've got this...

The Dodgers have two players with similar names, Jamey and Jamie, who are batting against Jaime.

Has Vin mentioned this yet?

No Hope For Loney said...

Positivity does work. Who knew?

MR.F said...

Jamey Carroll has really been a contributor.

MR.F said...

RISP! RISP!

Fred's Brim said...

Jamey tags up!
risky move but it pays off

Fred's Brim said...

cmon Dre, plop it somewhere

No Hope For Loney said...

I Like that hustle,Ackbar. I like it a lot.

Paul said...

What was the point of that?

MR.F said...

Risky, but I'll take it.

Paul said...

Oh that was the point.

Fred's Brim said...

there we go! free runs!

No Hope For Loney said...

nice

MR.F said...

HOORAY FOR HUSTLE!!!!

karen said...

Nice hustle, Jamey!!

Fred's Brim said...

I saw my first "It's time for Dodger baseball" commercial! I like that they show Nancy Bea

Paul said...

I still think it wasn't that smart. But Carroll is the man.

Orel said...

@Steve: "Has Vin mentioned this yet?"

I believe he made a Jamie/Jaime observance.

Paul said...

Sharks up 2-1 in 2nd. Boooooo!

Paul said...

Kings tied it up!!!

Mr. Customer said...

Crap.

No Hope For Loney said...

FUCK

MR.F said...

Wow...

Paul said...

Doesn't Kuroda know 5 runs is out limit.

Fuckbags!

Mr. Customer said...

We fucking scramble to get a run back, and cough it up in one swing.

Paul said...

Fat Elvis lost some pounds

Steve Dittmore said...

Thanks Orel... just seemed like something he'd mention.

Plus, if you truncate James Loney you can get Jamney.

Paul said...

Hiro getting smacked around.

Josh S. said...

Eh, Pooholes always tags us at least once a series, but he's usually not himself when he faces us.

Steve Sax said...

I would not call this Kuroda's best game.

Paul said...

Okay throw the towel.

No Hope For Loney said...

Go Sharks!!

Josh S. said...

@Prof. Dittmore: Loney's been truncated enough lately, thank you.

MR.F said...

Neither would I, Sax.

Josh S. said...

Just don't let Kuroda throw the towel, it'll end up in deep left.

Paul said...

I'm already tired of this team.

Fred's Brim said...

Hiro looked good in the first inning

Fred's Brim said...

hehe i like the term "full of beans"

Paul said...

Hiro just doesn't have it tonight but can finish five and keep us in the game.

Fred's Brim said...

I wonder if there would be a difference if Barajas has caught this game

Paul said...

Okay. He dun.

karen said...

Oh nooo, Hiro!

No Hope For Loney said...

*silence*

Paul said...

*burps*

Fred's Brim said...

The only way we're going to win this season is if we pitch well. The Giants and Padres won with terrible hitting last year. We have to have better pitching, pitching that doesn't give away runs, limits damage and finishes innings when we get two outs.

Josh S. said...

@FB I was wondering the same thing. Hiro and Barajas work really well together.

Fred's Brim said...

Garcia is lucky to be winning here. He has been pretty bad

Mr. Customer said...

It occurs to me that I may have underestimated my booze budget for the summer.

Fred's Brim said...

James is alive!

Paul said...

Our starting rotation is good. Not great.

Josh S. said...

Wow, Loney's timing is impeccable.

MR.F said...

Vin notes that Loney gets his single when nobody is on-base.

No Hope For Loney said...

*stays silent*

Fred's Brim said...

@Mr C - you are gonna have to buy cheaper shit to make it work

Fred's Brim said...

@Josh I wonder how much difference a catcher makes on a game. Has somebody come up with a statistic for that?

Paul said...

Mr. C is gonna have to stock up on the Boones

No Hope For Loney said...

@ FB

Ask Ross Porter. He's got a stat for everything.

Fred's Brim said...

hehe Vin

Steve Dittmore said...

Do we have a nickname for MacDougal? He sort of looks like Shaggy.

Steve Dittmore said...

200

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