Saturday, February 03, 2007

Only Two Betting Hours Left!

Thanks to somewhat legal sites like, one no longer needs to befriend the local underbelly to drop some dimes. Which is good for a borderline degenerate gambler like Delino. Over the years, I've managed to win repeatedly in Vegas while losing almost every other bet, including Kim Cattrall's nudity in an episode of the Whores in the City (she got naked, with seconds to spare) and when one friend would lose his Big V (I was off by three days... damn you Goldschlagger). But I think my bets on the Super Bowl this year would make Black Sox fixer Arnold Rothstein proud.

Going with the logic that even MVP QBs are muzzled a bit in the big game, I took the under for Mr. Manning's passing yards.

I hate that "You're Beautiful" rubbish, so felt it was a smart bet that James Blunt will win more Grammys than Peyton will get TDs (that's a REAL category).

I assumed that Tank Johnson would be too distracted impressing the nation's top defense attorneys to focus on sacking. So Adewale better throw Peyton down first, or my sack bet is lost.

I elected not to go with coin toss or official start time, but feel strongly that Vinatieri will do what he does best. Look for him to get the first points of the game.

Oh yeah...I'm taking the Bears with the points. But look for the Colts to win by four. So sayeth Delino.

And everybody's abuzz over the real Wild Card, the Artist Formerly Known as Relevant. Will he have a codpiece malfunction? I wouldn't worry. If you ignore the 1000's of conquests, the lyrics to "Cream," and 99 percent of the pictures he's taken, he's rather puritan. After all, he chooses to live in Minnesota. No, the real buzz is what songs will he play. Look for his new cover of the Foo Fighters' "The Best in You," some "Little Red Corvette," and all 43 minutes of Jethro Tull's "Thick as a Brick."


Orel said...

What are the odds on a Prince reunion with Wendy and Lisa?

Delino DeShields, Sr said...

Purple Rain was as cool as his hair schmata was lame.

Steve Sax said...

No nipple. (sigh.)