Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Garciaparra Article Conceals Yet Another Fat Joke

Steve Henson's latest post from Vero Beach headlined Nomar Garciaparra, who is feeling good physically despite being distraught about being away from his pregnant wife. As Nomar and Mia's twins are due in April, being apart must suck, but at least it will give him a chance to bank up on that sleep now.

"We're blessed and fortunate," Garciaparra said. "But not being there with her the last month and a half of her pregnancy is going to be tough."

Garciaparra said the injuries that plagued him last season have healed, pointing to his rigorous off-season workout regimen as proof.

"I judge myself by the way I can work out in the off-season, and I didn't have to hold back," he said. "That's a good sign."

But wait, that's not the fun part! The last part of the article segment has this gem:

The only factor that could change Garciaparra's position [from first base] is the development of top prospect James Loney. But even if Loney makes the team, he would back up at first base and the corner outfield spots. Little plans to give Garciaparra a significant amount of rest in an effort to keep him from experiencing another late-season tailspin. That would be the case even if Loney begins the season at triple A. "We have Olmedo Saenz to play first, Jeff Kent can slide over once in a while, and you might see Marlon Anderson there sometimes," Little said.

So even Grady Little has to acknowledge that if Saenz plays first, Jeff Kent's gotta slide to his right just to accommodate his hefty teammate. And poor Marlon Anderson--so obscured by Saenz, that Anderson might even disappear from view during the eclipse.

Man, I can't even write quotes this perfect. Thanks, Grady!


Orel said...

Not all of us can be trim and beautiful, Sax.

Anonymous said...

I think he means that Jeff Kent can move over from second base to play first.

Anonymous said...

"Anonymous", meet "sarcasm".

"Sarcasm", meet "anonymous".