Vin Scully, from last night's game against the Cardinals:
Bottom of the second inning, no score, and the subject is Mike Matheny.
Matheny, forty-four years old come the end of September, born in Ohio, lives in Missouri. But he was not even eighteen years old and he came to the University of Michigan with a major-league dilemma.
Earlier that summer, the Toronto Blue Jays had drafted the catching prospect in the thirty-first round, but Matheny decided to honor his college commitments — but he had a lot of doubt.
Getting drafted was a dream come true, and if he waited til later on, the next time the offer would be less or not forthcoming at all.
So, he was a young man, not eighteen, and a lot of pressure. Should I turn pro or go to college?
Major League Baseball rules allow players to sign with teams up until the player officially enters college full-time. That's the key, full-time.
Anyway, Matheny showered, ready to go to class for the first day. Walked out of the dormitory, stomach knotted.
And a pigeon defecated directly on his head.
Now, conventional wisdom would suggest the bird bombing was a sign that he should hit the road, but Matheny had to go back and clean up.
The pitch to Uribe a strike, oh and one the count.
He went back, and showered, and cleaned up, and decided, all of a sudden, he was at peace. "I'm going to stay here. I'm going to go to college."
And there was one other thing that happened.
The strike-one pitch, swung on and missed, oh and two.
Matheny went to his first class, and when he reached class, he noticed a pretty field hockey player named Kristin. And he would marry her, and live happily ever after.
And that's the story of Mike Matheny and the bird poop, as Uribe hasn't much of a swing as he returns against a great pitcher and strikes out....