Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Deadspin Tony Gwynn Tribute Contains Wonderful Will Clark Nugget

Did I say wonderful? Sorry, I meant awful.

If you didn't already love Tony Gwynn, you will after reading "I Was Tony Gwynn's Bat Boy" by David Johnson at Deadspin. And if you didn't already hate Will Clark, well....

One day, one of the bat boys showed up wearing an earring. Bright gold and massive. The Giants were in town. During batting practice, Will Clark walked by and sneered, "Nice earring, faggot." The words were stunning, but we knew we had to react like it was no big thing. Word must've gotten around, though, because before the next game, Tony walked back to the locker room area with Bip Roberts and performed an entire routine for us. They had evidently practiced it during batting practice. They stood lecturing us, using every "how to talk like an older white guy" cliché in the book. "Now listen, son," Tony started, stopping periodically to catch his breath, as he was laughing too hard. "You're bringing down the team here, with that earring." "Very, very unprofessional," Bip added, haughtily. They walked away, howling with laughter, the point made: Will Clark was a dick.

Now, I don't want to make a snap judgment based on one piece of anecdotal evidence. So I found some others!

Clark, Bonds,, the Giants sure know chemistry! I wonder what this guy has to say about it.


Fred's Brim said...

That's a great fucking article. It got a little dusty in my office while I was reading it