Saturday, December 04, 2010

UCLA-USC GameThread (7.30p)

When I was growing up in Los Angeles, this game actually meant something. I had the great fortune of going to most of these crosstown rivalry games, either at the Coliseum or the Rose Bowl, oftentimes going with another friend of mine (who will go nameless but used to be a Son until we killed him for sport).

I have this awesome childhood memory of being at the Rose Bowl with this nameless friend after a close game, having to wait for the queue of exiting fans down the aisle to start inching their way down from the stands toward the tunnel. Of course, we started screwing around, and he was below me in the aisle of unmoving people, and I shoved him forward, causing him to push the guys in front of him like dominoes. This of course pissed off a guy about five people down from us, and he started yelling at the guy immediately behind him, who happened to be from the other school and didn't take kindly to his words. Next thing we new, it was an all-out fistfight between these two guys, with people screaming and punches flying and my friend and I deciding to cut back across the horizontal row and get the hell out of there, fast. Hilarious.

Those sort of memories might be the only thing that comes out of today's game, a matchup between two non-bowling programs in various states of rebuilding, scrapping over their last game of the year. Bill Plaschke even tried to inject some suspense into the SoCal showdown in yesterday's column, using his opening five paragraphs (and only six sentences!) to make some ridiculous insinuation that Lane Kiffin's job is on the line today. Pshaw. This game is a yawner, with smaller bragging rights than ever. Not that it can't be fun; it's just...not too meaningful this time around.

For those of you heading out to the game this weekend, enjoy the rivalry and root on your favorite team! And keep your hands to yourself when exiting the Rose Bowl.

62 comments:

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

FUCLA

Dusty Baker said...

Ready for this.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Jon Gold, who covers the Bruins for the Daily News, predicts USC will win. Scott Wolf, who covers the Trojans for the Daily News, predicts UCLA will win.

#UnbridledConfidence

rbnlaw said...

Arsenal top of the table once again.

Who the fuck are Man U.?

rbnlaw said...

Oh, and FUCK SC!!!!

My side is chosen. Who's with me?

*endures silence*

rbnlaw said...

Going to have my 2nd Bass of the day, then off to daughter's 2nd soccer match of the day. Then, off to her 2 basketball games for the day. Aresnal scored 2 goals today. I'll probably smoke 2 cigars tonight and drink 2 different beers at my friend's grand opening of his brewery.

As Vin would say; "The deuces are wild."

Deuces, y'all.

Dusty Baker said...

Those were some brilliant goals from Nasri this morning, RBN. Damn. At least I had him in my fantasy lineup.

Dusty Baker said...

Wait, your friend is opening a brewery, you are going, and we didn't get an invite? Booooooo!

Orel said...

I'm opening a brew. And everyone's invited!

Dusty Baker said...

*shows up at Orel's back gate*

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Berkman's a Cardinal. Commence hate.

Dusty Baker said...

HATE engaged.

Steve Sax said...

there we go, updated. thanks for the wait guys!

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

The greatest irony has to be that the thing Rick Neuheisel hates more than anything in the world is what's keeping him from being fired: The attention being paid to USC. This guy hasn't been able to finish above 3-6 in conference play, has only one bowl bid thanks to a pancake non-conference schedule last year, and has seen his half-assed attempts to usurp USC's glory blow up in his face time and time again. And he's still got a job. Lane Kiffin could finish the season at 7-6 and people still would suggest he should or could be fired. Slick Rick should count his blessings and send Pat Haden a nice muffin basket.

Spanky said...

I'm with RB.

FUCK SC!

hateHateHATE

Josh S. said...

Oh man, they're putting Berking Lance Fuckman on the outfield? On purpose? I guess "Hit it to Lance" will be every Cardinal opponent's mantra.

Josh S. said...

^in

Dusty Baker said...

Great story, Sax. Though it would be better if your "friend" were wearing tighty whities and yelling "Apple jacks!" repeatedly.

Dusty Baker said...

Auburn: check
Oregon: check

Hey, hey, ho, ho! Arkansas in the Sugar Bowl!!!

Dusty Baker said...

I wonder if Sons of Joaquin Andujar are tweeting about how mad they are that Cardinals paid so much for Lance Berkman?

Steve Sax said...

I think the Apple Jacks story is hard to beat, but I'll keep digging...

Josh S. said...

One fewer year to Uribe and he he could have been our Lancing Berk Manfuck, I suppose.

Josh S. said...

^I'm having a typo kind of day.

Dusty Baker said...

What's the story with the mass brawl outside the Rose Bizzle? Two stabbed and officer injured? Simmer down, folks. What would happen if this game actually had any real implications besides an historic rivalry? Nuclear war in the Arroyo?

Spanky said...

Bronson?

Steve Sax said...

"police say alcohol was involved"

No shit, Sherlock

rbnlaw said...

Marla Sportsczar:
I agree with you on Newasshole. Karl Dullard had a better record after his third season, and his team beat Adrian Peterson and Oklahoma that year. . .I was there.

Of course, I was also there at the Emerald Bowl when UCLA had a 2nd half meltdown vs. Bowden State. Thank gawd we were in San Francisco, or I would've lost my mind.

Fuck SC!!!

Dusty Baker said...

Alcohol was involved with me reading that story, to be sure.

rbnlaw said...

Off to the new brewery in Downtown Anaheim to watch the game.

Cookie Puss out!

rbnlaw said...

Refugees,
Get to the back gate, I'll sneak you in one at a time.

Dusty Baker said...

@RBN

Do I have to wear a fake beard and comedy glasses?

Dusty Baker said...

"He said alcohol was involved and that police were working under the assumption that the brawl erupted out of the longstanding rivalry between the two schools."

Thanks, Chief Wiggum.

Dusty Baker said...

Predictions?


I predict I will go to my local MEX cantina and have a few Cadillacs and watch the game.

Dusty Baker said...

I also predict that we will need to bail Spanky out tomorrow morning.

Spanky said...

Thanks for that invite,RBN. Even though I'm still on the lamb from the O.C. for that brawl I instigated at the Hilton Doubletree Lobby in Irvine back in August,I am so fucking there,Dude.

Steve Sax said...

Empty seats abound at the Rose Bowl. The stabbing must have scared everyone away...

TD Bruins

Steve Sax said...

Still 7-7 and a yawner. Wife is asking me if we can switch over to Lifetime, and I'm having trouble formulating a counterargument.

Steve Sax said...

Brehault is not that good. Yet another three and ouyt, nearing the fourth quarter with USC in the lead 14-7.

Steve Sax said...

Man, these two teams are horrible. USC finally got a third touchdown here, but it's borrrrrrring.

21-7 USC, 11:17 left in the fourth.

Dusty Baker said...

@Sax

What is on Lifetime right now? Need to know in order to help form a counterargument. Chances seem slim, though. Maybe they should have filmed the dude getting knofed in the robs and shown that instead.

Dusty Baker said...

Cruel non-catch for Bruins in the end zone. Homie should have had that. Put a form in this one. Sure wish it meant more for either or both teams this season.



(mopes)

Dusty Baker said...

Fight!

Announcer said we don't want to see it end in a fight. Fuck that! I do.

Dusty Baker said...

"Gotta nice little Saturday night planned...Bar-hopping in suburbia. Making new fast friends. I think Ben Folds wrote an album about this."

#MKnightSlamathon

Dusty Baker said...

Where did everyone go? Dusty sad.

Dusty Baker said...

45

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Dear Rick Neuheisel,

Go directly to jail.
Do not pass Go.
Do not collect $200.
One of these days, your Bruins will win a game of Monopoly. But until then, you're my little bitch.

Sincerely,
Mr. LA Sports Czar

Dusty Baker said...

Heh. You said bitch.

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

That I did.

Steve Sax said...

Where do we all shake out on Molly Knight? I have been a fan, and I like the fact she's a Stanford alum. But I sense from the crowd that some people may be tiring of her shtick.

Dusty Baker said...

Her schtick is waaaaaaaay old, just as it got started. I also think that any inanimate object could do her job, if not better, so there is a jealousy factor involved. Finally, she is way behind on virtually every sports story, and when she does report on it, she acts like she's the lone human to report that news.

rbnlaw said...

goddammit.

rbnlaw said...

Fire Newasshole.

rbnlaw said...

Fire Chow.

Dusty Baker said...

Chow fire!

Mr. LA Sports Czar said...

Chire Fow.

rbnlaw said...

Friend made some stout that was 8.5% alkyhol.

Shit is on.

rbnlaw said...

Nuck Fuheisel!!

Dusty Baker said...

Clearly and unmistakably, it is on, in the vernacular.

Steve Sax said...

the sports illustrated san francisco giants commemorative edition advertisement is on espn right now.

i want to cancel my subscrption

Spanky said...

Joy Division time MOFO's! heh

Spanky said...

The # is (760)344-2111. Bail will be set at 10 large. If you think I am kidding,call it. Ask for Spank-to-pus.

Dusty Baker said...

I'm going to call dat # at about 3:45am tomorrow.