Thursday, October 23, 2008

The SoSG 2008 Dodgers Yearbook: Students, Section 2


Dear Derek,

You're graduating from the team! You had perhaps your best year as a Dodger, you were a one-man Diamondbacks-beating machine, and we wouldn't have made the playoffs without you...yet we couldn't help but feel you never wanted to be here. Your boner for Boston isn't becoming, but you're going to earn a huge contract this off-season anyway. Hope you're happy wherever you end up. BFF!


Dear Chad,

Our ace of the present and the future. Forget the NLCS, because we know the real Chadley isn't that pitcher. The real Bills will return in 2009 another season stronger and wiser—and you're only 23! The Dodgers have been to the post-season two of your three years with the team. If that trend continues, you'll be a big part why. BFF!


Dear Hiroki,

Maybe we should nickname you "Colossus" because watching you is like riding a rollercoaster. Fortunately, you provided more thrills than spills, from your near-perfect game to your two ballsy playoff wins. For some reason you're much more comfortable at Dodger Stadium than on the road—maybe something to work on in 2009? BFF!


Dear Clayton,

The Minotaur has landed! You're like the kid who skipped grades—baby-faced but more talented than everyone else in the class. And to top it off, you handled this year's rookie hazing with humility and composure. As long as your arm doesn't fall off, we're looking forward to watching your Dodger career unfold. BFF!


Dear Greg,

You're graduating from the team! Thanks for pitching out of the bullpen—and not complaining about it. There's speculation you could retire or even become a player-coach. The Dodgers have a couple of youngsters who could benefit from your mere presence. Your call, though—the golf links are calling. BFF!


Dear Brad,

You're (maybe) graduating from the team! Brad, Brad, Brad. Where did it all go wrong? You started the year as the Dodgers' putative ace and ended it on the 60-day DL, nowhere to be seen during the team's playoff run. And because there is no such thing as too much pitching, you may be back to do it all over again in 2009. If not, you'll be at least $2 million richer. Tough life. BFF!


Dear Cory,

If Clayton was overhyped, then you were underhyped. Somehow you quietly compiled a 2.27 ERA and .925 WHIP over 71 1/3 innings. There was that one unfortunate inning against Philly (see Jonathan, below), but you've earned yourself a spot on the 2009 roster. Congrats. BFF!


Dear Hong-Chih,

How do you do it? You've had more work done than Elizabeth Taylor—FOUR arm surgeries in your history—yet you managed to pitch a career-high 83 regular- and post-season innings this year. We don't see you returning to starting duties, but you'll be a vital part of the bullpen. Stay healthy! BFF!

Chan Ho

Dear Chan Ho,

You're (probably) graduating from the team! You returned to your alma mater to state your case for starting in 2009, but your second-half numbers make that an iffy proposition. Still, we think some team will take a chance on you as a back-of-the-rotation guy. Good luck! BFF!


Dear James,

We don't want to make Clayton jealous, but you really caught our eye during your 5 1/3 scoreless innings in the NLCS. Now everyone is penciling you in for a starting spot in 2009...which may be a bit premature (you threw only 141 minor-league innings this year), but a tantalizing prospect nonetheless. BFF!


Dear Joe,

You're (probably not) graduating from the team! No offense, but you're a bit of an oddball: You're a LOOGY, you have a jersey robe and your fan is nuts. Still, you've atoned for your past sins and seem like a good citizen and a likeable guy. See you in 2009. BFF!


Dear Jonathan,

If Hiroki's a rollercoaster, then you' earthquake? The economy? We were certain you'd inherit the closer role this season, which you did...then didn't...then did. There were playoff highs and lows, but one thing's for certain: You'll keep on keeping things interesting for us in 2009. BFF!


Dear Takashi,

You're (maybe) graduating from the team! You were our bullpen savior in the post-Gagne era. Ned Colletti got you for a song—yet you remained completely professional throughout. Now it appears injuries have clouded your future with the Dodgers, and all without a bloated guaranteed contract to compensate for your cheap productiveness. Is this the end? If it is, then we thank you. BFF!

We hardly knew ye: Yhency Brazoban, Scott Elbert, Brian Falkenborg, Jason Johnson, Esteban Loaiza, Scott Proctor, Eric Stults, Tanyon Sturtze, Ramon Troncoso.

Coming soon: the Faculty!

Earlier: The SoSG 2008 Dodgers Yearbook: Students, Section 1



Dear Jason,

You've been so invisible that I forgot about you, but you can bet the Dodgers won't be forgetting about you. After all, they've paid you $35 million for one win over two years. Yowza! Tell you what: Get 59 wins in 2009 and we'll call it even.


QuadSevens said...

Broxton is intimidating on the mound, and intimidating in his picture.

Steve Sax said...

Why does Wade get the profile shot? Our school photographer should be shot.

Steamed Gravy said...

SoSG dudes, I totally dig the school yearbook approach. Very creative and fun reading. Can't wait to read more.