Mario Super Sluggers Invade Dodger Stadium, Put On Clinic

AC and I were lounging around SoSG Worldwide Headquarters when the phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Hello! It's-a me, Mario!"

"Mario, you can drop the whole accent schtick. Some people find it offensive."

[pause] "Sorry about that. It's just that Nintendo is bustin' my balls, pushing the jolly Italian plumber thing. Just the other day I had to Roto-Rooter Shigeru Miyamoto's sewage pipes!"

"How can I help you, Mario?"

"Now they're making me play baseball. For this game, Mario Super Sluggers. I have to learn to hit home runs, and fast. Get some gabagool in dese guns, capiche?"

"Newsflash, Mario. The Sopranos is over."

"Try telling that to Nintendo."

"Anyway, don't you already know how to hit home runs? From your other baseball games?"

"Yeah, right. Let's just say Mario Small Ball didn't set any sales records."

"So what do you want?"

"I tried to order some steroids, but my dealer says no one will touch 'em now!"

"Imagine that."

"So my agent thought the next best thing would be to have the Dodgers show me how to hit home runs. The Dodgers hit a lot of home runs, right?"

"Uhhh...."

"Great! I'll have Luigi pick you up in a Stretch Kart. Meet me at Dodger Stadium, Event Suite 2."

"Mario, just one question. Why is your moustache black and your hair brown?"

"What's that? You're breaking up—hey! Down, Yoshi! Bad dog! Or whatever you are! Princess, get Carlos Millan on the line—" Beep.

When we got to Dodger Stadium, it turned out Mario was way ahead of us. In fact, he had already assembled most of a starting lineup. And I couldn't help but notice the similarities between the Mario Super Sluggers and the Dodgers....

MARIO SUPER SLUGGERS	DODGER EQUIVALENT	Why?
Mario	Russell Martin	The franchise.
Bowser Jr.	Matt Kemp	Young and exuberant.
Luigi	James Loney	Sometimes bobbly but generally reliable.
Donkey Kong	Jonathan Broxton	Ox. Kong. 'Nuff said.
Peach	Jamie McCourt	Did you really think I was going to compare a player to Princess Peach?
Yoshi	Juan Pierre	Wearer of jaunty cap/shell. Occasionally lays an egg.
Wario	Manny Ramirez	Hero to some, villain to others.

Want to know more about Mario Super Sluggers gameplay? Check out AC's At-Game Recap!

(For gaming fans, it should be noted that while Event Suite 2 was hosting a Wii demonstration, Event Suite 1 had a 2K Sports kiosk complete with an Xbox 360 with the Red Ring of Death.)