Sunday, May 22, 2011

The Rapture Might Have Been Averted...UPDATED

... but Macho Man is still gone.

As the one east coast, old school wrasslin' lovin' SoSGer, it is my duty to comment on this terrible loss. I...

It's still too difficult to talk about. About Leapin Lanny Poffo's brother, I will just say this.

  • He almost destroyed what Jesse Ventura referred to as the "lar-nix" of Ricky Steamboat...

  • Which led to the greatest match in the history of the "sport" at Wrestlemania III

  • His battles with George the Animal Steele reminded us all that beauty could truly kill the beast.

  • His appearance as Bonesaw in Spider-Man accounted for $250 million of its gross.

  • And none of what I write here makes any sense to SoSG Sax, hater of wrestling (not to mention life, liberty and the pursuit of justice).

But for those of us who knew the man, the post-Rapture world will burn a little less bright without his familiar "Oh Yeahhhhh." Vaya con dios, Macho Madness.

Update: On Howard Stern, the Iron Sheik just called in to lament Randy Savage's passing and label the late Macho Man as "a cheap Jew son of a bitch." Apparently, Randy took all of the Iron Sheik's pot and never gave any back. For shame.

32 comments:

Josh S. said...

He also raised hating Hulk Hogan to an art form, and made it cool to do so.

DelinO said...

He had all of Hulk's flash without his annoying morality.

Dusty Baker said...

Well said, brother. F Hulk Hogan and may Macho Man Rest In Mechanically Separated Chicken Parts. If I elbow-dropped my little brother once from the "top rope" I elbow-dropped him a thousand times, thanks to Savage.

(leaves a Slim Jim on the tombstone)

(cries)

(makes sweet, sweet love to Miss Elizabeth)

Paul said...

He was by far my favorite wrestler. Greatest IC champion of all time. I still have my homemade macho
Man t-shirt complete with arm tassels. It made me happy and concerned my parents at the same time.

MR.F said...

I never really paid attention to wrestling but he sold me on Slim Jims as a kid.

Neeebs said...

Im more if a Freddy Lassie guy, myself.

*who they say?*

DelinO said...

My wife thought Rowdy Roddy Piper had died. Losing Savage was bad enough That would have just crushed me.

Dusty Baker said...

You mean Classy Freddie Blassie, Neeebs?

Dusty Baker said...

@Delino (thinking of possibility of Piper's death)

(cries)

I know it was unnecessary, but still...don't talk about that shit. I'm a fragile man right now.

Pistol Pete Reiser said...

I was and still am a Superfly guy.

(bows head in sign of respect for Macho Man).

Dusty Baker said...

Hard to understand
What a hell of a man
This cat of the slum
Had a mind, wasn't dumb
But a weakness was shown
'Cause his hustle was wrong
His mind was his own
But the man lived alone

Oh, superfly

Spank said...

The Brooklyn Brawler was the shit,yo!

Spank said...

Freddy's dead

Paul said...

I always pegged Neeebs for a George the Animal Steel guy.

Paul said...

Guys like Sax who want to pay full price for beers wouldn't understand the loss of Macho Man.

cc: Dusty.

Dusty Baker said...

+45 Paul

I would buy you a beer but I'm dead broke thanks to Sax's Draconian beer pricing policies.

DelinO said...

I just got over the passing of JYD. Hope they're both Grabbing Them Cakes in the sky.

Dusty Baker said...

(DDTs Delino)

Dr. Geek said...

Wait, did Dusty just make love to Miss Elizabeth's corpse?

Steve Sax said...

Yes, but he paid half price for his necrophiliac escapade.

Spank said...

@ Dr. Geek-12:24am

No. I believe that was sweet,sweet love.

cc:Dusty

Spank said...

I wish I had paid half price for this fucking nightmare.

DelinO said...

Where's the Ref?!!?

Josh S. said...

1, 2, HEGOTHIMNOHEDIDN'T!

Neeebs said...

@DB (8.00pm)

Damn you auto-correct on my stupid phone. Need to input BLASSIE into the dictionary now. Never know when I might need to pull it out again.

@Paul (10.20pm)

George and I go way back. We use to go to the same Forest survival camp for summer. Unfortunately, he ate all the road kill and I practically starved to death. Ever eat a pine tree? Many parts are edible.

DelinO said...

Can we get this thread up to my beloved 227?

Paul said...

Can the MegaPowers still explode?

Paul said...

Man I miss Gorilla Monsoon. I wish he was still around to call the Dodgers road games.

We would be hearing a lot of "Dodgers down by three runs! Goodnight Irene. Forget about it"

Josh S. said...

"The Dodgers are taking it in the external occipital protuberance!"

DelinO said...

And Ethier takes a shot to the solar plexus

rbnlaw said...

Wither Mean Gene Okerlund?

Dusty Baker said...

@DeLino

If you offer up a sock puppet thingy, I guarantee there are enough stubborn readers to drive up the count to at least 227.