Wednesday, October 24, 2012

World Series Game 1 Thread, 5p

Barry "Luckiest guy in the world" Zito vs. Justin "Luckiest guy in the world" Verlander.

Here we are, the nightmare scenario for Dodger fans everywhere (but especially in the Bay Area). The Giants are four wins away from becoming the first team since the Yankees to win two World Series in three years. The Tigers will be able to start likely Cy Young winner Verlander twice in the series, but the Giants are riding another wave of goddamn fairy pixie dust first farted out by Melky "All the benefits, none of the repercussions" Cabrera and continued by the likes of Angel "Mets fans go Whaaaaa?" Pagan and Marco "Plus 50 OPS+ points upon putting on a Giants uniform" Scutaro. So c'mon, Tigers. Act like the badass AL Champions you are and put a stop to this so-called momentum the Giants are riding. We're all counting on you.

58 comments:

Franklin Stubbs said...

Fuck this with a rusty soup ladle. I just can't watch.

Hideo Nomo said...

Don't forget Hunter "Oh, isn't he just so LOVABLY WACKY, even though his at-bats make him look like he has Parkinson's?" Pence.

QuadSevens said...

What about Pablo "I taught Juan Uribe everything he knows about being fat and still getting paid" Sandoval?

Dusty Baker said...

(barfs)

Paul said...

I hope someone hits Victorino.

Eugenio's Streak said...

What a turn fate. To go from rooting for the NL at the All star break to now rooting for the AL to win.

These times they are a changing...

oh yeah, #FuctTheGnats

Orel said...

It's that scene from "Stand by Me"!

Orel said...

*barfs*

Hideo Nomo said...

Fuct Tape.

Dusty Baker said...

It's a complete and total barf-o-rama!

#StandByMe

Dusty Baker said...

Natl Anthem kid was fucking terrible. Hope that portends Gnats getting swept.

Orel said...

Fatass HR off Verlander. And it begins.

Pedro Guerrero said...

Crap. Back from the dead. Pedro

Cliff Beefpile said...

Things I'd rather have than a gnats' World Series win:

1. A lap dance from Juan Uribe
2. Syphilis
3. Membership into the 'Twilight' book club
4. Burlap underpants
5. Satellite goes on the fritz and only show left is a month-long marathon of 'The Real Housewives'

Spank said...

I agree with Stubbsy.

*rubs one out on a rusty soup ladle*

Dusty Baker said...

Pedro is risen!

Dusty Baker said...

Fuck you Brad Pitt. That was one of the dumbest ads for any product I've ever seen. Really? Did you need the money?

Hideo Nomo said...

Maybe this is a sound strategy by the Tigers, since the Giants play so well in elimination games. Give them a lead in the series, then watch them get overconfident.

Or something.

Orel said...

2-0 Giants. Something about them makes opposing outfielders bobble otherwise easily fielded singles.

NicJ said...

What the hell happened to "cheaters never prosper"?!?

Orel said...

Giants continue to catch EVERY SINGLE BREAK. Pagan HITS THIRD BASE, hit & run gives Giants the strike-'em-out-throw-'em-out double play. FUCK FUCK FUCK

Steve Sax said...

honestly, I can't even watch this shit. it makes me want to vomit.

i can take solace in the fact that NO ONE watched the NLCS (whose ratings trailed The Walking Dead). Just like SF-Tex, if a tree falls in the forest...

Orel said...

Barry Zito just had an RBI-single off Justin Verlander.

NicJ said...

Is Leyland dead or something? Take his ass out already.

DDGRDUG said...

WOW...Just effing WOW!!! (Btw, longtime reader here! sometimes poster)

NicJ said...

I guess the only thing left is to decide which Giants player gets the World Series PED, I mean MVP.

MR.F said...

I hate the fucking Giants so much. GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

MR.F said...

THIS IS SO FUCKING STUPID. SOOOO FUCKING STUPID. THEY'RE GOING TO WIN. IT'S JUST DESTINED TO HAPPEN. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

MR.F said...

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

MR.F said...

IUAHICRSDCSADHIPTNABKTNH;UDKGCRPLA.D,.NSBDN;KBT;UNSKDUCRASID.PNB;KWJ;GCRSJ;DGCRSEAU.TMABWVM;JWVKB H;JRSDKAGCRLS.UBVABKJHTV;QXBCNSKDAKAS.UDECATNSUDEHTNADUEANHUTENAKDGC9L;QJD.4BWVA'BMWV;EBKJGRSDKPCRSAB4NABTNXAEUGCSNPB4AVEUHTNS;DKC;EURSDH4TNZABJK;TA

Hideo Nomo said...

I'm starting to think Angel Pagan is the actual Devil. Part of the deal he struck with the team for their success is he gets to play too.

Hideo Nomo said...

Mr. F needs to move down here.

Cliff Beefpile said...

Yeah, not much point in fighting it anymore. Let's just hope the Mayan calender thing is wrong and the world ends before game 2.

Cliff Beefpile said...

Happy to start a collection plate for Mr. F's relocation fund.

I have no doubt that Beelzebub's evil hand is in on this...and I'm an atheist.

Hideo Nomo said...

Un-fucking-real.

Paul said...

Shit Ned is gonna sign Panda to a 10 deal.

Paul said...

year

Hideo Nomo said...

They're going to have a pee cup waiting for him after the game, right?

Right?

NicJ said...

This is all just a set-up for a soul crushing series loss.

Hideo Nomo said...

I stand up for people holding illegible cards.

karen said...

I just got to turn on the game about 15 minutes ago so please forgive me because I haven't had time to catch up on the thread...but that big, fat, asshole needs to go, Shot to the head or maybe a Theismanisque gross broken leg that we can look at over and over as the network gives us every possible angle.

That's the only thing that will realy get me excited by this loser of a game.

Spank said...

Make it go away! Make it go away!

Dusty Baker said...

Sweet shitsucking jesus I'm angry.

Dusty Baker said...

45

Hideo Nomo said...

WASH YER GUITAR, BARREH!

NicJ said...

I wish they were showing the World Series on TWC Sportsnet.

Dusty Baker said...

I just noticed you went waaaaay old skool on your avatar, Nic. Always loved that one.

Orel said...

Hi DDGERDUG, feel free to spread the hate!

Cliff Beefpile said...

http://www.baseball-almanac.com/teams/sfatte.shtml

Those are the assholes that get to see a World Series for the fourth time in 23 years. The ones who didn't give a shit when the team was gonna move to Tampa Bay (yeah, I remember that, and you know goddamn well none of them do). I'd hate losing to the Yankees, but at least they give a shit. Their team isn't just a vehicle for hating Los Angeles, like the Giants are for San Francisco.

Orel said...

The Tigers scored a run. So there's that.

karen said...

Now that Timmeh is in the game, I could make peace with a gruesome injury to his unbathed body, too.

Eugenio's Streak said...

Can we start baseball hooligans? I need to hit something orange and black!

Oh look pumpkins!

Spank said...

*burns down SoSG headquarters*

Dusty Baker said...

Luckily SoSG HQ consists of a tin shed, an old refrigerator, a stack of clown porn, and the intricate IT infrastructure that is protected by a Balrog.

No harm was done.

Sadly for us, though, the Balrog is also in charge of IT.

Paul said...

Fuck!!!

Hideo Nomo said...

YOU SHALL NOT PASS!
YOU SHALL NOT SHOOT!
YOU SHALL NOT BLOCK!

Dusty Baker said...

YOU SHALL NOT USE WORDPRESS!

DDGRDUG said...

Thank you for the welcome Orel! I definitely will be venting here!!