Tony Jackson relates the headache-inducing details of Orlando Hudson's contract with the Dodgers:
$380,000 signing bonus, deferred without interest to a time not designated
$3 million base salary for 2009
$150,000 each for 150 and 175 plate appearances
$200,000 each for 200, 225, 250, 275 and 300 plate appearances
$250,000 each for 325, 350, 375, 400, 425, 450, 475, 500, 525, 550, 575 PAs
and then, there is this:
$10,000 for EVERY plate appearance from PA #576 through PA #632. That's 57 PAs for total of $570,000.
also, BEGINNING WITH 550 PAs, every one of these incentives, including that $570k, is deferred without interest to a time not designated. And the contract requires O-Dawg to donate $25,000 to the Dodgers Dream Foundation, something I'm sure he has no problem with because he is heavily involved in charity work to begin with, with a focus on the battle against autism.
Have you hit the Advil yet?
Okay, that's pretty complicated. But dig a little deeper and you'll find even more unexpected provisions that Ned Colletti & Co. have written into Hudson's deal:
1. Must determine definitive spelling of nickname: O-Dog, O-Dogg or O-Dawg (a.k.a. the "Scully Clause"). Because Dodger fans demand correct spelling on their handmade signs and banners! That is, if signs or banners were actually allowed at Dodger Stadium!
2. Must make the Padres regret not signing him. Boy, San Diego really missed out on a co-branding opportunity here. Second base could have been The Pet Zone O-Doghouse at PETCO Park! Instead, it's Mr. Eckstein's Neighborhood.
3. "Who Let the Dogs Out?" only to be played when Chin-lung Hu drives in Hudson for an RBI. And never on any other occasion. Speaking of which, can we place a moratorium on the Zombie Nation song played after Dodger home runs? That should have been retired after the 4+1 game.
4. Must donate an additional $25,000 to Los Angeles-area animal shelters. Must remind us tens of thousands of dogs and cats are euthanized in Los Angeles every year. Must remind us to spay or neuter our pets. Must ask himself, Who gave me this silly canine nickname anyway?
5. Must continue to have a great sense of humor about Joe Torre's pranks. Man, can you imagine Torre pulling that kind of stuff on our previous second baseman? (Of course not. That's what makes him Joe Torre.) Hudson's gracious reaction gives hope that he will be a positive influence in the Dodger clubhouse.