Monday, June 27, 2011

Game 80 Thread: June 27 @ Twins, 5p

"Do the Twins have a worse record than the Dodgers?"
"No...?"
"You're lying!"
"Yes."

Chad Billingsley (6-6, 4.48) vs. Nick Blackburn (6-5, 3.15).

Hunky Joe is correct: shockingly, the Twins are 32-44 while the Dodgers are 35-44. But this is interleague, where NL dreams go to die. To wit: who will be the Dodgers' DH today? Jay Gibbons? Nope, in the minors. Rod Barajas? Nope, on the DL. Marcus Thames? Possibly, but he's day-to-day. Here's an idea: Clayton Kershaw! Why not? His .297 BA is loads better than most of the Dodger hitters.

101 comments:

Jason W. Peace said...

Bankruptcy Creditor, Jr. - LF
Bearded Bankruptcy Creditor - 3B
'ruptcy Creditor - DH
Golden God Bankruptcy Creditor - CF
SLowBankruptcy Creditor - 1B
Bankruptcy Urinator - 2B
Australian Bankruptcy Creditor - RF
A.J. Bankruptcy Creditor - C
Fast Bankruptcy Creditor - SS
Bankruptcy Credithighs - P

Josh S. said...

So, Frank owes Vin money, but Steiner, Monday, Collins, and Lyons are all paid?

That.
Shit.
Ain't.
Right.

Jason W. Peace said...

I think it just means that Steiner, Monday and Collins make far less than Vin and, therefore, don't fall in the top-40 creditors. As it should be.

Josh S. said...

Ah yes, I forgot that's only the Top 40. There isn't enough paper to list everyone he owes money to.

Steve Sax said...

Steiner and Monday should actually be paying us.

Collins and Lyons should be mowing my lawn and picking up my dry cleaning, too.

Neeebs said...

@Josh S., 2:20:

That's what Lenin kept on saying to the Russian monarchs:

That Shit Ain't Right (TSAR)

Marla World Peace said...

WE SUCK: BANKRUPT EDITION

Marla World Peace said...

Hey, we're winning!

Marla World Peace said...

Damn, that's some bright sunshine.

MR.F said...

Look at that!

Wotcher everybody!

Jason W. Peace said...

Rick Monday is obsessed with saying "the Mendoza line" on the radio broadcast. I still prefer his play-by-play to Steiner's, though.

Steve Sax said...

holy shit, PITCHER BADGES ARE NOW AVAILABLE!!!

Steve Sax said...

Rick Monday never bothers to tell you the score of the game

Marla World Peace said...

James Loney... not suck?

Steve Sax said...

Loney with a RBI!!!

Steve Sax said...

i

want

my

chad

billingsley

badge

MR.F said...

Another run!

Steve Sax said...

uribe, the strike zone is over that way

Josh S. said...

@Jason He's also obsessed with botching Nishioka's name.

Jason W. Peace said...

Frank is now searching for a way to "monetize" Blake GIDPs, Loney singles and Uribe swing and misses.

Josh S. said...

I'm running out of ways to talk about how much Uribe sucks.

Steve Sax said...

Urine...still sucks

Steve Sax said...

just think, we've got two more years of urine

Steve Sax said...

and probably two more years of this mccourt litigation, ironically enough

Steve Sax said...

"bankruptcy urinator" is pretty funny, btw

Josh S. said...

NishiokA, Ricky.

Jason W. Peace said...

Monday works in a Mendoza line reference and also slaughters Nishioka's name in the same sentence. Well played.

Marla World Peace said...

Hey, I got a Nishioka badge.

Jason W. Peace said...

Has emo Juan Uribe made a Tumblr about Urine's bat being on the McCourt bankruptcy liability list?

Mr. Customer said...

That was odd.

Marla World Peace said...

THUNDER DOWN UNDER!!!

Spank said...

HR!

Jason W. Peace said...

That was the anti-Steiner call. I didn't once think, "I wonder the ball will clear the infield?"

MR.F said...

Wait what?

Marla World Peace said...

Tony can't stop.

Spank said...

JR. 3-3 already.

Spank said...

I <3 the Twins!

Marla World Peace said...

Damn skipee, Beardo.

Spank said...

That's an error,Psycho. You fucking idiot homer.

Jason W. Peace said...

Screw you, Johnny Rockets near Josh's office!

Steve Sax said...

Squishy Nishioka just opened up Sax's TENTH badge case

145 badges, baybee

Jason W. Peace said...

*Frank dials 1-800-LOAN-MART*

Spank said...

The Dodgers will have to put Urine on the D.L. because he just ran 2 bases.

Marla World Peace said...

I don't understand. The Dodgers are playing interleague baseball AND winning? I thought the two were mutually exclusive.

Steve Sax said...

neeeeeed bills to make it through the next inning

Spank said...

Rancho Ethieriendo!

Spank said...

Not anymore.

Steve Sax said...

i have to admit it's getting better

it's getting better all the time

8-0 Dodgers

Steve Sax said...

These guys are playing amazingly inspired tonight, considering they will not have paychecks to cash in three days

Josh S. said...

Just got home. The center field cam at Target Field makes this look like a soccer match.

The score does not.

Steve Sax said...

50

Steve Sax said...

dammit

Steve Sax said...

ethier, we needed a double to activate your badge (which I have already)

Jason W. Peace said...

I think this game is the Dodgers' way of preemptively answering the inevitable question, "will the bankruptcy affect you on the field?"

Marla World Peace said...

I thought Jim Thome was dead. Or maybe I just imagined that steel mill accident.

Steve Sax said...

yahoo, i think i'm in line for a billingsley badge baybee

upside: we finally have pitchers badges

downside: since the badge is based on "win", one can just poach until the win actually happens (rather than having to be online at that point in time)

Spank said...

^Nerd

Steve Sax said...

ha ha twins, you are so bad even James Loney can have a multi-hit game off you

Steve Sax said...

see you on the other side, dudes

Spank said...

These are the Twins we are playing right?

Steve Sax said...

ha ha twins, you're so bad even Urine can get a hit off you

and take second base on a fielding error

Steve Sax said...

17 hits, holy shit who are these guys?

Steve Sax said...

Dodgers do not yet realize the Twins are in the AL

Steve Sax said...

i cannot believe this game

Steve Sax said...

mccourt bankrupt, dodgers fecund

Josh S. said...

Any realignment plan must include the Twins moving to the NL West.

Steve Sax said...

Finally, we have a situation tailor-made for Broxton.

Spank said...

Hot Damn! What a play!

Marla World Peace said...

Well played, Mauer.

Spank said...

The dodgers are throwing a massive wad and won't have nothing left foe the rest of the week.

MR.F said...

Jeebus. Golden Bison.

Pistol Pete Reiser said...

Dangle a paycheck in these guys' faces and look what happens... damn.

Jason W. Peace said...

Jason Repko is still on an MLB roster?

Fred's Brim said...

what the christ? why the fuck can't we hit at home?

Jason W. Peace said...

Oeltjen basically crawled from 2nd to 3rd on that triple.

Marla World Peace said...

This is our offense for the rest of the week, so soak it in, folks.

Spank said...

That was almost a HR for lil Flash.

Marla World Peace said...

Correction: This is our offense up until August.

Spank said...

Rams 14, Vikings 0

Spank said...

(cries)

Jason W. Peace said...

Dodgers trying to make up the entire season's -42 run differential in one game.

Marla World Peace said...

That second inning sucked ass.

Josh S. said...

@FB: Frank sold the Dodgers' home hitting rights to a foreign investor.

Josh S. said...

Any chance Oeltjen bats again?

Neeebs said...

Anyone know a good TV repairman? My TV is on the blink. It says Dodgers 15 Twins 0. Yeah right. Please fix this now. Family Guy is on soon.

Marla World Peace said...

Trent bats third in the ninth.

Marla World Peace said...

Dammit.

Spank said...

Insane

Marla World Peace said...

Andre is the only batter with exactly one hit.

Josh S. said...

That's party-making worthy.

Jason W. Peace said...

Making bankruptcy party!

Steve Sax said...

boom! billingsley badge, baby!

Marla World Peace said...

Hooray!

Josh S. said...

Each of those runs cost $10 million, so now Frank REALLY has no money.

Spank said...

Shazaam!

Josh S. said...

So, if I were to find a participating Johnny Rockets, could I get 3 burger combos for $5, or at least one for $1.66?

Spank said...

Make your own burger,Boyiee!

rbnlaw said...

"15-0? Geez the Dodgers really stink!"
-My Daughter #3

"Uh, no dear, they're winning."
-Me

"They're winning 15-0? Why couldn't they do that to the Angels?"

"Fair question, dear. Fair question."

rbnpeace said...

Had to jump on the Metta World Marla Sports Czar Peace Baker bandwagon.

rbnpeace said...

100

Steve Sax said...

POST-GAME THREAD UP!!!