Saturday, December 23, 2006

Merry &$*%!#@ Christmas, Dave Kingman

"Dave Kingman beat us with three &$*%!#@ home runs? 'Naughty' list."

In the spirit of the season, we present an uncensored transcript of Tommy Lasorda's infamous response to reporter Paul Olden's seemingly innocuous question, "What's your opinion of Kingman's performance?"

"What's my opinion of Kingman's performance? What the fuck do you think is my opinion of it? I think it was fucking horseshit! Put that in, I don't fucking—opinion of his performance? Jesus Christ, he beat us with three fucking home runs! What the fuck do you mean what is my opinion of his performance? How can you ask me a question like that, what is my opinion of his performance? Jesus Christ, he hit three home runs! Jesus Christ! I'm fucking pissed off to lose the fucking game, and you ask me my opinion of his performance? Jesus Christ! That's a tough question to ask me, isn't it? What is my opinion of his performance?...Well, I didn't give you a good answer because I'm mad, but I mean, that's a tough question to ask me right now, what is my opinion of his performance? I mean, you want me to tell you what my opinion of his performance is....That's right! Jesus Christ! Guy hits three home runs against us. Shit, I mean I don't want to, I don't mean to get pissed off or anything like that but, you know, you ask me my opinion. I mean, he put on a hell of a show, he hit three home runs, he drove in, what, seven runs?...Eight runs! So what the hell more can you say about it? I didn't mean to get mad or anything like that but god damn, you ask me my opinion of his performance."

There seems to be some confusion as to whether Lasorda's explosion occurred June 4, 1976, or May 14, 1978—as Dave Kingman had three home runs and eight RBIs against the Dodgers on both dates.

Check out some excellent detective work behind Tommy's tirade here. Yes, even obscene rants get deconstructed.

As for the reporter Olden, CBS SportsLine reports:

Olden has since gone on to do play-by-play for the New York Jets and Tampa Bay Devil Rays, and for many years announced the starting lineups over the public address microphone at the Super Bowl.

"I ran into Paul a few times when he was announcing for Tampa Bay," Lasorda said. "I told him, 'You didn't do anything wrong. I was the guy who did something wrong.' "

photo by Myung J. Chun/L.A. Times

3 comments:

Robert said...

Reminds me of Allen Iverson's Practice Rant, if AI had sprinkled in cursing every few words. :)

Orel said...

Cursing elevates a rant into a tirade.

Spanky said...

Oh Snap! I just ran into this post looking for a pic of lasorda on yahoo. Re-post this fucker.HaHa!