Per everybody (though I think Ken Rosenthal broke it first), Hanley Ramirez has a torn thumb ligament requiring surgery. The Dodgers announced he will be out eight weeks.
Barring any panicked acquisitions (and one thing this ownership does NOT do is panic), that means our Opening Day lineup will consist of either Juan Uribe at 3rd and Luis Cruz at short or Cruz at 3rd and Dee Gordon at short. No, it does not mean Yasiel Puig will be converted into a 3rd baseman.
Despite the mountains of crap we give him, I'm leaning toward Uribe, if only for the defense. (And, OK, the comedy factor.)
We now return you to your "I guess money doesn't buy thumbs! DERP!" narrative.
Ken Gurnick: "Needing surgery, Hanley likely out two months"