Stephen Fife (4-3, 3.38) vs. Brandon McCarthy (4-9, 4.58).
Happy Whacking Day, everyone! It is finally time to drive the Snakes from the NL West! (They'd still be alive in the Wild Card, but on life support.)
Tonight's scenario isn't exactly how we envisioned it. Don Mattingly has given Clayton Kershaw some additional rest (lining him up to start Game 1 of the NLDS), so Stephen Fife takes the mound tonight in the first potential clinching game. Fife was, well, awful in his last appearance. With Kemp and Hanley (and possibly Carl Crawford) back in the lineup, though, Fife should have enough run support to be able to relax. Update (3:46p): Kemp and Crawford are in the lineup, but Hanley is OUT. Argh.
We can set aside the talk of Magic Numbers for now. A win in either of the next two games gets us in. A lot has gone wrong lately, but let's make it right tonight (tonight tonight).*
*h/t Neeebs
198 comments:
Puig RF
Crawford LF
Young 3B
Gonzalez 1B
Kemp CF
Mellis 2B
Punto SS
Federowicz C
Fife P
Suddenly less confident.
Looks like I picked the wrong day to quit sniffing glue.
We got this,Holmes'.
Elementary, my dear Watson.
Uribe, Ramirez, and AJellis all sit.
Well, we can still close this out on Thursday!
SWEET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tonight, tonight, tonight...oh oh.
gonna rub one out tonight tonight
oh ohhhhhhhhhhhhh
If we don't win today....sumptin terrible is gonna happen...
We got this one kids. When we won in 1981 I was in the hospital having a C-section. In 1988 I was in the hospital having girly stuff surgery and yesterday I had to have surgery on my arm. The math is simple...Me + surgery = LA World Champs.
That's awesome, Karen. Not the surgery, but the correlation.
i guess i don't need to wear the rally thong then. what a shame.
You flossing again, spanky?
DA FUQ JUST HAPPENED?
every day,my dear sherlock.
where the hell was that pitch, blue?
@spank, yeah was slow to come up to a grounder and then threw poorly and Eaton made it to second
not to mention getting picked off second in the top of the inning
yikes! puig making me look bad having his back and shit. thanks FB. just realized the game is on ESPN so now i can see this clusterfuck for reals.
i don't understand
it makes no sense that he keeps doing this to us
This is not our night.
fucking fife
throw strikes, stupid!
Bring in League!
did i just say that?
fucking hell. what the fuck is this shit? Pitch right mofo.
Come on Barney. Get your shit together. Stupid ass.
well if we have to pull him, at least we have Fife in the bullpen to eat some innings...
OK you got the hard out, now finish this!
fuck ESPN
good job
call that both ways, Joe! Ass
So walk him. Right?
little fucker
walk him on the elbow
i'll take it
finish off Hill, please
jesus, Hill has the same stupid stance as Goldstuff
way to work out of it, kid
how about we see a lot of pitches next inning
2 runs aint sh*t.
Because tonight tonight tonight
at least we cleared the pitcher
Fife is wilder than Coco Loco on meth.
shiznit. 3-0 D Bags
gotta figure something out, Fifer
Fife, what the fuck dude
Fuck off, West
My dad was convinced that Joe West hated the Dodgers. Sometimes I wonder if he was onto something.
that was pathetic
Well shit. I hope this doesn't mean I'm going to have to come up with something else to be operated on.
Fife...is not the answer.
Try pitching with your left arm,Fife. you can't do any worse.
do we have anybody else who can eat a few innings? Brett Tomko?
(starts sniffing glue again after but a brief period of abstinence)
Tom Bretko?
I think you can go hit him now.
Pitching change....upon Joe West's approval.
throw strikes, dummy!
The end of this season makes me want to drown a sack of kittens.
GIDP right here. C'mon, Marmol.
Does anyone think this scuffling, bumbling, monkey-fucking-a-football quality of play has any bearing on our chances in the postseason, if we somehow manage to get in?
I assume Hanley is available to pinch hit tonight?
drown a sack of garbage releivers?
what a fucking embarassment
West isn't helping us at all
This is what happens when a team has their biggest divisional lead since Carter was President.
@FB: It's weird. Any time you see teams that just breeze into the playoffs after clinching way early, they're often an early knockout. So while it's torture for us to sweat it out a bit, it might be better for them to face a few pressure situations. Particularly the younger guys.
we are so out of this game but are still in it somehow
good call, Cliffy. I hope you are right
BOOM!
@Paul
Carter just sent in a few meekly-armed helicopters to try to rescue Clayton Kershaw. Disaster. On the heels of this poorly-planned liberation that signaled American weakness, Ted Nugent will now be elected president.
woohoo that was a bomb
We call that mitigation.
Buh-bye, ball! #Puig
More HRs as a rookie since Piazza, now surpassing Mondesi.
ROY, right?
Think the Dodgers are defending the Carter administration now.
That's right Raul only had 16. Seems like he had more that year. Oh that was the strike year right?
Come on Kemp. Stay in your lane.
Kemp'd
Yeah, Mondesi was the ROY for the strike year.
Fife was ROY for the Can't Throw Strike year.
Two runs...it's a start. Let's do this, Dodgers!
Western bacon cheeseburger time
The Can't Throw a Strike Award, also known as the Brandon League trophy.
the fastball sets up your other stuff, Carlos
this mound must be crooked or something
it's about time Parra hurt us
wow, West throws us a bone
those fuckers in frisco are drinking wine and trying on jeans. they forgot about baseball a month ago
At least we cleared the pitcher
I just cleared a pitcher.
Is Donnie going to rest Nolasco tomorrow so Capuano can get some work in? Onelki Garcia could use a few innings too
hey it's Brandon League
hey it's Brandon League?
that was an interesting K there
if I stay up and watch this, there is no way we win and I go to bed angry at 1am.
gotta stay up though
cracking the last can of SlyFox Royal Weisse
this is not our fucking night
SAFE
not
even
close
AG get tossed?
show some passion with that argument,El Don. kick some dirt. bitch slap West. do something. dude was safe.
terrible
Well that was bullshit.
We were robbed on that call...twice. Throwing out AGon is bush league
Let's win this game and go celebrate in the ump's locker room.
AG yelling at Joyce to hustle down to home plate
LOVE AGon's fire, though.
Andy Fletcher, Depeche Mode's keyboardist, would be a better ump.
HR here Matty. Shut them up.
Look at Joyce - he knows he missed that call
Which brings up the next point: why the hell was Juan Uribe the pinch runner? And not Gordon?
Have I mentioned I hate Arizona?
@spank - good point, wrong state to be acting up in
What the fuck was Wallach doing?
@Saxy, Uribe will take Young's spot at third, Young to take AG's spot.
Gordon will be stranded at first later in the game
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
stupid-ass game can get fucked
Fuck. That should have tied the game. GODDAMMIT! You're costing us playoff home field, you sack of pubes!
That was our shot.
This is when League blows up for 3 runs and I go to bed
Vin hasn't talked about tattoos as much this year
It seems that if Young had slid head or feet first it wouldn't even have been a close play.
sheesh, when we get him out we still can't get him out
nice pickup by Uribe though
cmon, Brandon, keep me in the game
Paco in to frustrate us some more.
Is he tired or does he just stink?
Am I tired or do I just stink? Yes
cripes
I'm frightened.
OK you got the hard out, finish this, Pac!
ahh so this is when Parra kills us
this is going to end poorly. Parra is due against us
I thought for sure that was going to dribble out of his glove for a frustrating infield single
and nice work, Paco!
BTW, nice Whacking Day play in the GT, Gnomes!
Nick gets us going
Don't swing, FedEx! That's the only way you're gonna get on base...and that was ball three.
4-3, bitches!
@FB
When I read your comment-
"Paco in to frustrate us some more.
Is he tired or does he just stink?
Am I tired or do I just stink? Yes"
I automatically read it to the tune of Fade to Black by Metallica. Either you or I are certifiable. I'm thinking it's me.
yah! fuck yah!
I'll gladly eat crow! Way to go, FedEX!
attaboy, FedEx!
@DB hehe it is definitely you, but I am not counting out myself
Can't get enough of that hittin' off Sipp.
FedEx looks like Macaulay Culkin if Mac was a baseball player
why wasn't Skip running on that?
stupid bunts
"We're know you're in there, and that you're aaaaalll alone." - Anyone pitching to FedEx
#HomeAlone
Stupid blunts.
way to get the stupid bunt down, Skip
Blunts!? Where?
"Keep the change, ya filthy animal!" - FedEx
Dutch Masters
Get use to the stupid bunts. Playoffs = close games +Donnie over thinking /bunts = *cries*
Puig, ugly strikeout, Crawford, weak grounder to a middle infielder
Donnie could use a blunt
Serj Tankian in to face Puig
"It's what the French call 'les incompetent'" - re: Brandon League
well...damn. come on crawdude
cries
Joe Thatcher vs. Chad Roe
Compare and contrast.
Gibby walks like a woman twice his age
Joe vs The Volcano
if only Crawford had any kind of resemblance to a volcano. Dormant volcano maybe
Full count to SVS, with men at the corners and one out
Gibby playing the role of Meg Ryan?
@FB: It's SVS, not Crawford
SOn of a bad word!
christ
Dammit, SVS
the only godamn thing you couldn't do, and he did it
You have some time left, Dodgers You have some life left. My advice to you is: live it well.
there is no way we win this, with all the bad shit that has happened
@Paul: so lots of bunting?
We've not been good, but they're the ones who've left the bases loaded 3 times.
good job, B
Nice job Willie Blue Beards.
Hernandez has always gotten our goat
Fuck these umpires.
take it easy, Juan
Come on Kemp. Show us who you are.
Damn! Nice rip Matty.
good lord, if we didn't have bad luck, we wouldn't have any luck at all
This is when Belli gives up 2 stupid runs and makes me kick something
throw strikes, stupid!
Bullpen has kept us in it the whole night. Don't let it get away now.
If Belisario is in, we've conceded
And there you go. Goddammit, Belisario, you have sucked the last four weeks.
Nice move, Van Slyke
that's terrible, Beli
Thanks. I could have turned this off 3 hours ago.
Beli's 2 months are over
It's really sad but the only guy I trust at this moment is Wilson.
Kenley can get some out but he's been shaky too
Please get rid of Belisario.
In both tonight's game, and for the postseason.
He's done.
what a waste
the rest of the bullpen somehow kept them at 4 and Beli flushes it all down the toilet
how many innings has Beli not finished?
who the hell do we have in the postseason bullpen? Seriously, Kenley, Wilson, Withrow, Paco and Howell from the left side? Who else could you tolerate coming out of the pen in a big spot?
hell in a handbasket.
Is the ninth inning Stephen Fife impression inning?
Okay I'm done.
Keep leaning on that great summer Dodgers.
*sigh*
why am I still awake?
gnite all
Fedex HR! 9-4 Diamondbacks. Down to a five-run lead!
Suck it, Arizona
pgt up.
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