Zack Greinke (13-2, 1.58) vs. Scott Kazmir (6-8, 2.43)
Behind Greinke, who is riding an 11-start unbeaten streak, the Dodgers look to rebound from a complete shitstorm of an outing yesterday against the Astros where NO ONE* GOT A GOD DAMN HIT. Thus, we're all a little salty with a strong chance of having hangovers. And that nasty taste of a shit sandwich in our mouths. I'm anxious to wash away the bad taste with a nice IPA and another excellent Greinke outing!
Roenicke Watch: 0-3
*On the Dodgers
90 comments:
Rollins SS
Puig RF
Turner 3B
Gonzalez 1B
Van Slyke LF
Utley 2B
Hernandez CF
Grandal C
Guerrero DH
(Greinke P)
Ah, yes, the old DH in the ninth spot gambit.
Greinke will right the ship for us today.
I had posted saying that Greinke would get a hit, but I forgot he's not batting today.
Then we might get no-hit again.
Utley watch 0-1
Nice dusty with the 2 pm comment. Yikes
Starling!
let's get a goddamn win tonight, fuckwads
FUCK
booze status: only in my mind
gnats lose on a walk-off. Now score some runs, dummies! I swear, if they get no-hit by the guy with the world's cheesiest moustache...
hey, that was almost a hit
Two quick outs in the first.
Turner's slump continues.
we're locked in
what are the chances Turner's trip to the DL was somehow juice related and he's not on a cycle right now so he's a little off?
wonderful start
We're supposed to GET hits, not give them up.
also, what are the chances the bats are protesting Bundy's benching by sucking?
Dodger conspiracy theories, I've got plenty of them
You been binge-watching X-Files all weekend, FB?
ANd turner bobbles it to allow a run when we could have had an easy out at 1B. I may be over the JT love affair. Plus he's a juicer, or so I've heard recently from someone somewhere.
GODDAMMIT!
I miss Uribe
what the hell is wrong with Turner?
he has no competition for time at third and he falls apart
idiots in the outfield, lucky to have caught that one
That god damn Eddie Gaedel guy hits a triple and JT's error gives up the first run of the game. It may be all the Strohs need today. 1-0 after one.
J.P. Hoornstra @jphoornstra
Justin Turner has made three errors since he recorded his last hit. #Astros lead, 1-0.
Fuck everything.
Surliness factor: 8.5
Well, we can't get 'em out at the plate...hope Yaz's arm holds up...
Good thing we got rid of Calypso/Uribear.
You got struck tha fuck out, Chase.
Chase Utley. AKA the trade we needed six years ago. Now, not so much.
hey missed that half inning, did we get a hit?
History fact: Grover Cleveland was president the last time we got a hit.
^I was even intending to answer your question, but I did, FB.
Fuck a dude named after a cheese
Fuck a dude named after a Muppet
I don't think the SNLA strike zone thing is real because it's never different from the ump's call. I think somebody just puts up a graphic that is close to where it was but just enough to confirm the call
getting clowned
You're getting clowned by an OS upgrade? What are you, my mom?
Neeebs' mom uses Macs.
"This whole road trip is just one long, drawn-out dick punch."
That PGT writes itself...
Roll technically gets a hit but is thrown out trying to stretch it into a double.
Just cannot get something going.
Was it the Carter Administration the last time we won a review?
Walter Mondale would have called him safe.
Then Puig gets a "hit" but is ruled an error instead.
When is a hit still an out? When the Dodgers do it. Jeez, as ridiculous as it sounds, I'm switching over to the Raider game in hopes of finding a team with a better shot at winning.
Wait, the Raider game is on? #pictureinpicture
I am ashamed to admit this but I'm beginning to miss the Ned Colleti regime...
they'll review that, foul
Utley gets his first hit.
Ron Roenicke can get bent
Chase Utely with a triple, his first hit as a Dodger. Ron Roenicke was like, damn I forgot what I was supposed to be doing out here.
of course we're gonna lose a base
Now can we bring him in?
the Roenicke funk sends another runner away
Update: Not a triple.
Sac fly and a walk. Guerrero up now.
@Q7
No.
Chased ball 4 and we get nothing. Ugh!
@Dusty I should have guessed that.
Love the VW commercials with the old ladies. They crack me up.
Rollins got his double!
Puig sacrifice and Turner drives in Rollins. We're on the board!
AGon with a single now. As Steiner pointed out, we had 2 hits on our last two games and now have 3 in the inning.
just give it right back
Okay Family...I'm sure most of you have noticed my lack of dancing naked in the moonlight this season. But I can't neglect my gift any longer. At the risk of the SWAT team being called out by my neighbors again, I am prepared to make the sacrifice. I have a very special family ritual that goes back many generations in our Big Book of Guaranteed Wins for the Home Team that nothing else seems to insure victory.
Any chants, burning of incense and virgin sacrifices will be greatly appreciated.
goddamit, gotta pitch better, gotta do everything better
unacceptable
nice work, Dre
how many 3-pitch Ks have we had the past week?
jesus, it's like they are trying to get the ABs over as fast as they can
If they were better hitters, they would ground out on the first pitch but they can barely make contact
really, pinch hit Dre for Hernandez and move SVS to center?
@Gnomes, seeing Cincy as the next part of the road trip, does your 0-5 go to 0-8? or will we win one of those?
We go to the 8th. Dodgers down 3-1. Hurry up with the streaking and the chanting and shit, Karen!
Neshek makes us look like clowns but if he was a Dodger, he'd be Brandon League
Spongy out, fucked by his defense and offense
So much of what Donnie does is stupid, but you'd think just once, out of sheer dumb luck one of his dumb maneuvers would work. But nope. While you're at it, Karen, can we do some voodoo stuff and raise Walter Alston from the dead?
good inning from JP
Joc trying his best to tie it, will probably K
lines out sharply to center actually
Utz somehow beats out the double play ball
he probably rewrecked his ankle doing it
No Devil for Chase...Hope still burns eternal....
there it is, Gnomes's sphincter only has 1 more day to go
wack shit
Altuve is the new lead Mini Sirloin Burger.
Dre looked so bad on that swing, I support anything Spanky sees fit to do with him...I'm thinking first season of Sopranos when Christopher made grand use of the meat grinder...
Dre looked absolutely out of his mind in the shitty kind of way.
i'd put Dre's head in a vice,Pesci styles. #Casino
by the way this game was caca
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