Sunday, March 30, 2014

Game 3 Thread: March 30 @ Padres, 5p

Hey MLB Graphics Dept.: We're available!

Hyun-Jin Ryu (1-0, 0.00) vs. Andrew Cashner (Morse code).

Welcome to Opening Day! Opening Evening, really. Actually, it's the second of three Opening events for the Dodgers. They beat the Diamondbacks what seems like years ago and April 4 brings the Dodgers' home opener, when they'll already be 5-0.

If you're a non-TWC subscriber, this evening's game is the last chance you'll get to see the Dodgers on TV until Stan Kasten blows a gasket and goes postal on DirecTV and Comcast. Unfortunately, that means no Vin unless you want to suffer dread sync issues.

Oh, and Clayton Kershaw is on the DL. Is this a referendum on Qantas' business-class seats? Start an investigation!

204 comments:

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Dusty Baker said...

Crawford LF
Puig RF
Ramirez SS
Gonzalez 1B
Ethier CF
Uribe 3B
Ellis C
Gordon 2B
Ryu P

BJ Killeen said...

The roster is set: Relievers Brandon League and Jamey Wright...seriously Donnie? Are we gonna play it like this again?

BJ Killeen said...

Don't hate me, but we need a dress code on this team. Our guys look like bums, with shaggy hair, ugly beards...look at the Yankees...they look like ball players..

Dusty Baker said...

I tend to agree with you, BJ. Though I would grant a completely subjective exception. The same way Manny got a pass for his nasty-ass dreads in exchange for hitting a trillion RS in a short amount of time, I'd give a pass to Brian Wilson so he wouldn't have to shave that beard. Other than that, clean it up, lads. We a respektable team.

Hideo Nomo said...

I'd also like an exception for Joc Pederson, because his rat tail is amazing, and I can't figure out how he traveled back to 1986 to get it.

karen said...

Happy "Opening Day" All!! I am so excited for tonites game but would feel much better if Stan would start kicking some ass. Anyone's ass at this point will do, just get the tv shit DONE!

Dusty Baker said...

Great point, Nomo. Rat tails need to make a comeback.

And don't even call it a comeback.

Hideo Nomo said...

I wonder if I should ask someone on Twitter what channel the game is on.

Dusty Baker said...

Forget Australia, this is our opener. This needs to be said:

People will come, Ray. They'll come to Iowa for reasons they can't even fathom. They'll turn up your driveway not knowing for sure why they're doing it. They'll arrive at your door as innocent as children, longing for the past. "Of course, we won't mind if you look around", you'll say. "It's only $20 per person". They'll pass over the money without even thinking about it: for it is money they have and peace they lack. And they'll walk out to the bleachers; sit in shirtsleeves on a perfect afternoon. They'll find they have reserved seats somewhere along one of the baselines, where they sat when they were children and cheered their heroes. And they'll watch the game and it'll be as if they dipped themselves in magic waters. The memories will be so thick they'll have to brush them away from their faces…The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game: it's a part of our past, Ray. It reminds us of all that once was good and that could be again. Oh... people will come Ray. People will most definitely come.
-- Terence Mann (Field of Dreams)

karen said...

Beautiful, Dusty.

Thank you.

Steve Sax said...

Who is Ray?

Hideo Nomo said...

Ray Yu, our starting pitcher.

karen said...

Lots of Dodgers fans representing in LoCal.

Paul said...

DB, What do you think of Dos Equis Azul?

Paul said...

So how are the 2014 shadows suppose to be?

Dusty Baker said...

I wasn't aware it existed, Paul. What's the scoop?

Dusty Baker said...

A US-shaped flag. Intriguing.

Paul said...

It's brewed with blue agave and wheat. Pretty good summer beer.

Dusty Baker said...

I want to make sweet, sweet love to that beer.

Fred's Brim said...

FUCK
YES

Fred's Brim said...

I already miss Orel working for ESPN

karen said...

Many years ago my dad told me about seeing a Cubby fan holding up a sign on opening day. The sign read "Wait till next year"!

QuadSevens said...

Let's go boys! Beat the Pod Rays!

BJ Killeen said...

Where's Vinny?

Fred's Brim said...

Nice crowd, SD

Dusty Baker said...

Even the SD bench is populated with Dodgers fans.

Fred's Brim said...

Cashner's Jheri curl is amazing

Dusty Baker said...

Puig looked like a little bitch.

Steve Sax said...

For my national television season debut, I choose to wear camouflage uniforms. --Padres

Neeebs (The Original) said...

I got a bad feeling about Puig this year.

Steve Sax said...

Well, that was a bad first inning.

Dusty Baker said...

@FB

Cashner before the Michael Jackson bleach process:

http://www.complex.com/style/2013/02/the-50-best-celebrity-yearbook-photos/ice-cube

Neeebs (The Original) said...

I waited for months for this Drek?

Dusty Baker said...

@Neeebs

You had a bad feeling about him last year, too.

You're our designated Puig detractor!

Fred's Brim said...

@Neeebs me too. I am hoping he's not following a fast-forwarded version of Andruw Jones's career

BJ Killeen said...

We can only go up from here!

Neeebs (The Original) said...

I want him to succeed. I just....know things.

Fred's Brim said...

I make dough but don't call me Doughboy

Neeebs (The Original) said...

@FB. That's my reoccurring nightmare.

Fred's Brim said...

throw strikes, dingus

Orel said...

This team is 2-0?

Fred's Brim said...

@Neeebs, I shuddered when I heard he came to camp weighing so many more pounds than last year

Dusty Baker said...

I came to camp weighing more than last year, too.

Neeebs (The Original) said...

I'm hoping for a great season. Holding my breath.

Dusty Baker said...

45

Fred's Brim said...

yeesh

karen said...

Ryu making me very nervous.

Why did Hanley catch that??

BJ Killeen said...

Oh geez.

Neeebs (The Original) said...

Ugh

Orel said...

We're in 2013 form.

Dusty Baker said...

All 156 Pod rays fans in Petco are excited.

Fred's Brim said...

I came into camp in the best shape of my life
*immediately pulls hamstring*

Neeebs (The Original) said...

Get a K

Orel said...

Ks Headley. Nice.

Fred's Brim said...

Since I haven't seen Spank yet...
Headleeeey

Orel said...

Buster Olney ‏@Buster_ESPN 7m

Best way to describe situation with Clayton Kershaw: Uncertain. Has the same type of injury as Jurickson Profar. Return date is unknown.

karen said...

Shit

Fred's Brim said...

Ryu's not used to the spin going the other way in the norther hemisphere

Neeebs (The Original) said...

Wow. Not a close pitch out of 4 thrown

Fred's Brim said...

wow that was lucky in so many ways

Orel said...

UJTD!

Neeebs (The Original) said...

I'll take it

Dusty Baker said...

Huge inning for the Pods!!!! #NoRuns

karen said...

I'm with BJ. It's not the same without Vin.

Neeebs (The Original) said...

I haven't witnessed a Dodger hit all season.

Neeebs (The Original) said...

Hoping for a Jack.

Dusty Baker said...

Hoping for Jack Daniels.

Fred's Brim said...

attaboy, Youreebay

Neeebs (The Original) said...

Can I get a witness?

Orel said...

There's your hit, Neeebs.

Orel said...

AGon and A.J. look thinner. Puig looks bigger.

BJ Killeen said...

Never thought I'd be happy that Dee was on deck.

Fred's Brim said...

dunker for AJ!

karen said...

A line drive in the box score AJ!!

QuadSevens said...

That bat died an honorable death.

Neeebs (The Original) said...

I want to spell Ryu with R-B-I

Orel said...

yay Dee

Neeebs (The Original) said...

Alas no

Fred's Brim said...

at least we cleared Dee

Steve Sax said...

Dee Gordon, showing off that newfound +50 lb power

Dusty Baker said...

Shit AB, Tyrion Gordon.

Fred's Brim said...

HJ's not gonna make it to the 5th

Hideo Nomo said...

You know Ryu, you don't HAVE to get into trouble before you get out of it.

#ineedmydelino said...

I'm not going to make it to the fifth

Fred's Brim said...

Dee covered the bunt well

#ineedmydelino said...

GameDay flashing some 70s era graphics with that Sac Bunt.

#ineedmydelino said...

Almond Joy's got nuts.
MoundBall don't

Fred's Brim said...

way to get out of it, HJ

#ineedmydelino said...

Everth Day it ain't.

karen said...

HJ wiggles out of another one.

BJ Killeen said...

Breathe, breathe.

Neeebs (The Original) said...

I haven't witnessed a Dodger run yet this season.

Dusty Baker said...

Fernando looks like he's in better shape than HJR.

Fred's Brim said...

get rid of that stupid strike zone box, you chumps

Orel said...

Both bullpens will be busy tonight.

Fred's Brim said...

take more pitches, YP

Orel said...

Puig did something routine. Celebrate!

Orel said...

Puig is the anti-A.J.

Fred's Brim said...

couple of nice plays by Uribe there

Orel said...

Uribe & Sons: You smack 'em, we catch 'em

Dusty Baker said...

Uribe showing the leather already - he's fat but money on the hot corner. Sorry I ever dissed you, Johnny Urine.

Orel said...

Nice D makes for 1-2-3!

Fred's Brim said...

attaboy, Dee!
Nice inning, HJ

karen said...

Boys looking good with the leather.

BJ Killeen said...

Deeeee

#ineedmydelino said...

KAREN
To quote Dazed and Confused: "Watch the leather!"

Fred's Brim said...

damn

Dusty Baker said...

Fuck you Dinorfia for just doing your job.

QuadSevens said...

So close AGon!

Dusty Baker said...

Ethier looks entirely uninspired out there. Small sample size I know, but my gut says he's just not hungry.

I am hungry and thirsty, by the way.

karen said...

Dre better think about getting hungry if there's going to be a 4 outfielder situation.

Fred's Brim said...

Great inning, HJ

Neeebs (The Original) said...

LGD

Fred's Brim said...

rats

BJ Killeen said...

I hate Donnie's bunt calls

Paul said...

Cashner must use Soul Glow.

1-0!

karen said...

Hot damn!!

Steve Sax said...

Whoo Hoo! Seal broken!

BJ Killeen said...

Yeah Carl!

Steve Sax said...

Homer here for Puig.

Fred's Brim said...

there we go!

Fred's Brim said...

Ned's thinking about his next pair of cowboy boots

Neeebs (The Original) said...

Rancho por HR

Fred's Brim said...

Mrs FB: "The Padres look like a bunch of rednecks in those uniforms"

Fred's Brim said...

bah

BJ Killeen said...

Really Hanley? really?

Paul said...

That looked familiar.

Hideo Nomo said...

Thanks for wasting those dingers on the Freeway Series, Hanram.

karen said...

Pretty weak comparing Cashner to the Kid.

Fred's Brim said...

Great inning HJ!

Steve Sax said...

Would be nice if Ethier chose to swing one of these ABs

Orel said...

Ethier looks like shit. What's he grumpy about now?

Orel said...

AGon toe dance!

Orel said...

Public Enemy #2!

Orel said...

Wow, Ryu has retired 15 straight.

Fred's Brim said...

wow, another great inning from HJ

Fred's Brim said...

that was pathetic

Steve Sax said...

Don't fucking get me started on Dee and his goddamn shitty bunting.

Steve Sax said...

Every time Dee fails a bunt, an angel gets his wings

Orel said...

Two failed bunts in a row.

karen said...

With Dee in the 8 hole tonite it feels like we have to clear 2 pitchers spots.

#ineedmydelino said...

GameDay made it look like that wild pitch hit the hotel in the outfield

Steve Sax said...

Stretch baby. Too bad CC couldn't get another run there, but we can't depend on him in every two-out, RISP position

Steve Sax said...

Not a good GBA here

Wicks said...

What's good folks? I hope to be more involved here this season. Looks like we have a typical NL West game going on. Let's finish it!

Orel said...

16

Orel said...

Yo Wix!

Orel said...

UJTD!

Steve Sax said...

3-6-3 DP!

#ineedmydelino said...

My kids have commandeered one TV to watch Batman (circa the 60s). I've raised them right

#ineedmydelino said...

Will this game make it to post 227... time will tell.

Wicks said...

These Padres fans are brain dead but if you choose to live in San Diego that is a given.

Dusty Baker said...

All these Pod Rays pitchers look like they just emerges from the deer woods.

Hideo Nomo said...

*Dueling Banjos plays*

Orel said...

Damn, Wilson. Tie game.

karen said...

ShitShitShit

Steve Sax said...

Well, that wasn't good.

Dusty Baker said...

Well goddammit.

Wicks said...

Crap...that was a hanging something.

Dusty Baker said...

I've got something hanging...for Neeebs' mom.

Steve Sax said...

Why is Wilson imploding here

Wicks said...

You former jint bastard are you a spy trying to derail us?

Orel said...

Wilson: HR, BB, E

karen said...

This is unWilson like.

Steve Sax said...

Did he take third? I can't see him with that camouflage uniform

Steve Sax said...

BE L.A.

Steve Sax said...

We need to cut back to the shot of unhappy Ned Colletti

QuadSevens said...

Throw strikes Wilson!!

karen said...

Look at the chop job on Wilson's beard. I hope he doesn't have a Sampson complex.

Hideo Nomo said...

Donnie? You alive?

Wicks said...

Donnie is going to shave that beard off with barbed wire.

Paul said...

Well this sucks.

Steve Sax said...

Can we go back to Australia for the next series?

karen said...

Wik...or his teeth.

Neeebs (The Original) said...

My armpit hurts

Paul said...

Implosion.

Steve Sax said...

What the hell is happening here

Oh, Don Mattingly woke up!

Fred's Brim said...

ferchristsakes
shouldn't have cut that stupid dingleberry off the beard

Orel said...

Way to help out, AGon.

BJ Killeen said...

Didn't realize they were showing a rerun game from last April

Cliff Beefpile said...

Checking in from a birthday party...godfuckingdammit, Wilson!

Fred's Brim said...

throw strikes, stupid

Cliff Beefpile said...

I hate it when the noffense shows up on Opening Day.

Fred's Brim said...

white flag time

Paul said...

Even if we get out on the cheap down by 2 i really don't like our chances.

Neeebs (The Original) said...

Paco' s real name is Steven. Wtf

Orel said...

Perez K, Paco K

Paul said...

Steven is Paco in Spanish. Neeebs is Paco in Arabic.

karen said...

Good job Paco.

Fred's Brim said...

good job, Paco

Fred's Brim said...

DAMMIT!

Orel said...

Welp, that painful inning is over.

Neeebs (The Original) said...

Good job Steverino

Paul said...

Paco in early season form. Now come on boys give us some hope and dash it tragically with a strike out.

Orel said...

Mike Petriello ‏@mike_petriello 46s

LAD top five tonight -- Crawford, Puig, Hanley, Gonzalez, Ethier -- 1-19 with a walk. Hooray.

BJ Killeen said...

This ump hasn't called a strike over the plate all night.

BJ Killeen said...

Time for some come to Jesus meetings with the team

Fred's Brim said...

barf

BJ Killeen said...

Well, that was humiliatin

Fred's Brim said...

perfect season over
goodnight, all

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