Game 38 Thread: May 19 @ Giants, 7p

Would you like Frias with that?

Carlos Frias (3-0, 2.89) vs. Tim Hudson (1-3, 4.57).

Since getting swept at AT&T Park in April, the Dodgers have played seven series and lost none of them. That's been good for first place in the division (by 4.5 games) and the top spot in SI.com's latest Power Rankings.

And with the news that Hyun-Jin Ryu is likely out for the season, the focus on the Dodgers' fragile pitching staff intensifies. The maturation of Frias and the front office's canny addition of Mike Bolsinger have been fine stopgaps, but will they now have to become workhorses?

Game 162 Thread: Sept. 28 vs. Rockies, 1p

Zack Greinke (16-8, 2.74) vs. Christian Bergman (3-4, 5.29)

Didn't we just beat this asshole?

Well, ladies, gentlemen, and Delino, today is it: the last day of the regular season [(cries) cc: Mr. F]. Which means Greinke is only scheduled to go 4-5 innings max, ailing players like HanRam and Dee will have the day off, and you will see a lot of people you had forgotten about -- or tried to forget about -- and/or can't spell their name, playing out the game given that it is as devoid of meaning as an Adam Sandler movie.

However, there will be some levity on the day; as tradition dictates, players take on the roles of managers and coaches which is always good for some snark in this space. Juan Uribe will manage and Kershaw will be the pitching coach. Rumor has it that Ryu will be the bullpen coach if they can work out the language barrier. Fun times.

SoSG Nomo will make a rare appearance at the Yard, so hunt him down and buy him adult beverages. Team Killeen will be there as well in some bourgeois seats. SoSG Dusty is a late scratch but will be tracking the game nonetheless.

There's also some meaningful ball being played around the league so be sure to follow that, too.  Let's get this meaningless win and the series sweep to end the regular season on a winning note to carry the mojo through to the playoffs, which begin Friday, October 3.

Game 161 Thread: Sept. 27 vs. Rockies, 6p

Dan Haren (13-11, 4.03) vs. Eddie Butler (1-1, 5.56)

Today features the Dodgers' second to last game, which is completely meaningless. This would have been the best time to trot out a starting-pitching-by-committee strategy, but we had to employ that against the Cubs last Sunday when something was still on the line. Haren isn't likely to figure more than several innings in order to save him from himself  for playoff duty.

It seems like just yesterday we were bitching about the opening games being in Australia and the fact the we weren't able to watch the games on TV. And really, what's changed? (Tepid thanks to TWC for throwing us a belated 6-game viewing bone.)

Let's get through this one hopefully with a win, if not let's keep it close and respectable, and avoid injuries. I'll be out there today so hit me up if you want to buy me my second to the last beers of the season. Tomorrow, at least a couple of us Sons will also be there so hit us up if you want to buy us the last beers of the season.*

*The regular season I mean. We still expect free beer throughout the playoffs.

Game 160 Thread: Sept. 26 vs. Rockies, 7p

Roberto Hernandez (8-11, 4.08) vs. Jordan Lyles (7-3, 4.15).

Division champs! It's got a nice ring to it, but there's small chance the Dodgers could still be playing meaningful baseball this weekend. While the they've secured home-field advantage in the NLDS (against either the Cardinals or Pirates), the Dodgers are two sweeps away from owning the best record in the NL. That is, if the Dodgers sweep the Rox and the Nationals get swept by the Marlins. Unlikely, so in the meanwhile just enjoy some baseball to get you warmed up for the postseason.

UPDATE: Nats beat the Marlins in Game 1 of today's doubleheader, ensuring at least a tie for the best record in the NL (they own the tiebreaker by having gone 4-2 against the Dodgers this season).

Game 159 Thread: Sept. 24 vs. Giants, 7p

Why this card has two extra corner markings, I'm not sure

Clayton Kershaw (20-3, 1.80) vs. Tim Hudson (9-12, 3.52).

There are rumors buzzing that Tim Hudson, coming off of three straight losses and wielding the highest ERA (9.92) this month among any pitcher with 15+ innings, will be replaced at the last second with Tim Lincecum. It won't matter. Clayton Kershaw is positioned to have the Dodgers clinch the 2014 NL West tonight, and if there's ever a time to deal an ace, it's now.

How great would it be to have the Dodgers celebrate at home in front of their arch-rival? How fitting would it be to have our franchise face, en route to his third Cy Young Award and possibly a NL MVP award, earn the clinching victory? How premature are all of these visions, now that we've just evidenced that aces are far from infallible?

Who knows. Look, there's a chance that the Giants could be celebrating this evening as well, if the Brewers lose in Cincinnati, thereby giving San Francisco a back-door entrance to the Wild Card. Perhaps we'll have a joint party involving both teams!

No cake for parties 3 and 4? I'm confused again

On second thought, this just looks way too confusing. Let's just focus on getting our party set, okay?

Game 158 Thread: Sept. 23 vs. Giants, 7p

Zack Greinke (15-8, 2.76) vs. Ashley Madison (18-9, 2.91)

In Ashley Madison's last start against the Dodgers, the Giants scored nine runs, and the Dodgers zero. In Zack Greinke's last start against the Giants, the Dodgers scored seventeen runs, and the Giants zero. With the two facing each other tonight, you figure something's gotta give.

The Dodgers have to win both of the next two games to clinch the West without help from another team. They're not going to get it done with Dee, Puig, AGon, and Kemp putting up oh-fers. They're not going to get it done with sloppy defense*. And they're definitely not going to get it done by leaving Kevin Correia out there Diane on the mound. If any of that happens again, this series won't mean Jack.

*Except for that Puig throw. OH LAWD, THAT PUIG THROW. Let's watch it again!

Game 157 Thread: Sept. 22 vs. Giants, 7p

Dan Haren (13-11, 4.14) vs. Jake Peavy (7-13, 3.82).

It's the final countdown! One last homestand to the 2014 season!

And this is the last series we'll have this year with the Giants. And the season series is currently tied 8-8.

If we play our cards right, we'll get a chance to celebrate clinching the division at home, in front of the Giants. All we would need to do is win two of the next three games (which would also award us the season series victory, if my math is right).

Helping our cause will be the absence of center fielder Angel Pagan, out with an inflamed nerve in the lower back, and someone who absolutely kills us when he's in the lineup. Left fielder Michael Morse is also probably out for this series with injury, but all I got were dots and dashes from him.

I also should add that I'm watching today's game from enemy territory (wearing Dodgers shirt and cap). The last Dodgers/Giants game I watched was among friends and family (other Sons).  This time, it won't be so friendly. Let's see what happens.

Good luck, Danny boy!

Game 156 Thread: Sept. 21 @ Cubs, 11.20a

Jamey Wright (5-4, 4.30) vs. Jacob Turner (5-10, 6.20).

Saturday we choked the party.
Giants lost because they're sorry.
Sunday, please don't crumble once again.
Cause it really ain't much fun
When the bullpen gives up runs
And we won't enjoy the weekend with a split

I've been stranded with a blank tv
(Thanks to the hacks at TWC)
Even had to listen to Charley for the games
But I'm going to take a shit
On Security Benefit
If I have to hear that fucking commercial with the grandpa and the kid one more goddamn time

Today, it's Wright.
(Donnie is crazy.)
But Wright just may be the lunatic we're looking for.
Just try to last
And don't throw BP
You may be old, but that's okay; you're Jamey Wright.

Game 155 Thread: Sept. 20 vs. Cubs, 10a

Roberto Hernandez (8-11, 4.06) vs. Felix Doubront (2-1, 1.50).

Is it me, or are these games getting earlier and earlier? As the Dodgers go to the third game of this series, let's hope that the Wrigley Field's confines can continue to be just as friendly for the visiting team as they were in the first two games. Not hoping for much given the Dodgers throw Roberto Hernandez, 0-2 in his last three starts, supported by a bullpen which had to put in an uncharacteristic amount of work yesterday in early relief for Clayton Kershaw. Doubront has apparently impressed in his three starts since joining the rotation August 30. But look, if this one goes bad, you can just hit snooze, turn off Fox (that's right, you will actually be able to see today's game!), and go back to bed.

Dodgers' magic number:

Game 154 Thread: Sept. 19 @ Cubs, 11.30a

Clayton Kershaw (19-3, 1.70) vs. Edwin Jackson (6-14, 6.09).

If the Dodgers can just focus in their last nine games, they've got a shot at locking the playoffs by the end of today, and the division as soon as...hmm, I guess the home series with the Giants early next week (magic number is 2 for the playoffs and 8 for the NL West title). Let's start by watching to see if Clayton Kershaw can earn his 20th win, for only the second time in his career (2011, Kershaw's first All-Star year). The Giants don't start their series with the Padres until later in the day, so wouldn't it be great if we could extend our lead back to three games before they take the field? All we need is some...focus.

Game 153 Thread: Sept. 18 @ Cubs, 5p

"Changing your pillowcase helps prevent acne."

Zack Greinke (15-8, 2.64) vs. Tsuyoshi Wada (4-3, 3.34).

Two-faced? These Dodgers? They're 40-35 at home and 46-31 on the road. They score 17 runs one day, then give up 16 another day. With the exception of the consistently good (Kershaw and AGon) and consistently bad (Perez), the team is riddled (Riddlered?) with schizo performers: Good/Bad Haren. Developing/Immature Puig. Injured/Healthy Kemp. Terrible/Serviceable League. Hence, we have no idea which Dodgers team will show up today in Chicago, even with the Giants winning with sphincter-tightening regularity. Roll those dice!

Game 152 Thread: Sept. 17 @ Rockies, 12n

Not Taye Diggs; Carlos Frias

Carlos Frias (0-0, 3.91) vs. Jorge De La Rosa (13-11, 4.28).

In tonight's performance, the role of Hyun-Jin Ryu will be played by Carlos Frias. Who is not rotund, nor is he Korean.

But it should make for a a pretty good show--Frias held the Nationals scoreless over six innings, a highlight in that otherwise regrettable game--so long as Frias doesn't let the perils of run-happy Coors Field crush the life in his soul. To paraphrase the words of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., "Frias, last; Frias, last; (we will) thank God almighty (if) we (can make) Frias last." Didn't know MLK was a Dodger fan, but I'll go with it.

The Giants and Diamondbacks play their game early as well (12:30p, first pitch), but with Madison Bumgarner on the mound for San Francisco, I'm guessing we'll have to win to keep the NL West lead at 3.

Game 151 Thread: Sept. 16 @ Rockies, 5:30p

Yep, we're really struggling for opposing pitcher jokes.
Dan Haren (13-10, 3.99) vs. Tyler Matzekptlk (5-10, 4.23)

The Dodgers look to win four-straight for only the third time this year. (Remember when they couldn't do it at all?) To do so, they'll have to get Mr. Matzekptlk to say his own name backwards. And preferably early, so they can attack the soft underbelly of the Rox bullpen like they did last night.

Speaking of DC villains, Dan Haren's been a lot like Two-Face this year. The coin's been landing on "good Haren" the last few starts. Where will it land tonight?

The Dodgers' Magic Number for the West is Dee Gordon (9). The Magic Number for the Postseason is Juan Uribe (5). It's getting real, kids! GO BLUE!

Game 150 Thread: Sept. 15 @ Rox, 5:30p

Closest thing to a pun I could find for the opposing pitcher

Roberto Hernandez (2-3, 4.75) vs Christian Bergman (2-3, 4.889 ERA)

Roberto Hernandez at Coors Field: What could possibly go wrong? As prescient as Dodgers' coaching staff was to set up the rotation of Ryu, Greinke, and Kershaw against the Gnats over the weekend, the down side of that means we get Fauxto and a pitcher to be named later (likely Frias) to start this series against the Rockies. As bad as the Rox are, we'll still of course need to keep pace with the Giants, who take on the nearly equally as shitty D'bags. Three games ahead going into tonight is better than two, or one, or being behind (that comment inspired by Magic Johnson's twitter account), but that lead doesn't seem like a very good cushion to me yet.

It seems more like:

Than:

Let's hope the team doesn't have a post-SoSG Fest 2014 hangover and gets the job done in Denver. If not, I know a lot of places there to have some craft beer and drive away that hangover the old fashioned way.

Game 149 Thread: Sept. 14 @ Giants, 1p

Clayton Kershaw (18-3, 1.67) vs. Yusmeiro Petit (5-3, 3.62).

Rubber match time against our arch-rival, late in the season with a narrow division lead. It's a time when nerves are tense, anxiety is high, and...beers are flowing! That's right, it's time for Dodger Baseball...and it's time for SoSG Fest 2014, the annual tradition where Sons and SoSG diehards come together and watch the game, maybe with a pint or twelve of alcohol nearby. Never again will you see snark and alcohol flow in such mass, and this year's Fest aims for six of the seven Sons in attendance (and if you understood how challenging it was to get those six in the same place at once, you'd raise a toast, believe me).

Let's go, Dodgers!

Game 147 Thread: September 7 @ Giants, 7p

Hyun-Jin Ryu (14-6, 3.16) vs. Madison Bumgarner (17-9, 3.02).

So it begins, the first of six games left in our final sixteen against the arch-rival Giants. With the Giants two games back in the West, and the weekend series up in San Francisco, I've got a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach that we are going lose ground this weekend. The Giants are on a tear, and Bumgarner (SF's #1) is 2-1 with a 2.41 ERA in three starts vs. the Dodgers this year. San Francisco outfielder Hunter Pence leads the NL in hits and runs scored and Angel Pagan is on a hot streak himself. Remember, the Giants led the West for most of this first half of the season, owning a lead as much as ten games at one point.

The Dodgers look shaky from the plate, led by Yasiel Puig, who appears to have lost his way (and his swing). The Dodgers are 12th in the league in HR, with no one besides Adrian Gonzalez really mashing. Dee Gordon's slumping has kept him out of starting lineups of late. And when we have to depend on fourth outfielder Carl Crawford to lead us to victory over a sub-.500 team, you know we're in trouble. (And I'm not even bringing up the infield's recent error-prone play.)

I'll be watching (amazingly, I can watch this game end-to-end). But I've got a bad feeling about this.

Game 146 Thread: Sept. 10 vs. Padres, 7p

Rizzo, Newk, Jansen. Oh to be a fly on that dugout wall.

Dan Haren (12-10, 4.17) vs. Ian Kennedy (10-12, 3.75).

If Game 1 of this Padres series was a tantalizing preview of the Dodgers offense of full display, yesterday's Game 2 was a cautionary tale about poor defense and missed opportunities. What will tonight's rubber match bring? Dan Haren has been laboriously restoring his good name here in the second half, and the Dodgers are going to need him if they want to stave off the surging Giants.

Game 145 Thread: Sept. 9 vs. Padres, 7p

Roberto Hernandez (8-10, 4.00) vs. Andrew Cashner (2-7, 2.39).

Did you know Babe Ruth was a first-base coach for the Dodgers in 1938? The thinking was that 76 years later, the Dodger franchise could take advantage of this fact and make a fortune with Ruth bobbleheads. That plan comes to fruition at Dodger Stadium tonight. Congrats on playing the long game, guys.

Also coming to Dodger Stadium is Cashner, who has never given up a home run to the Dodgers. Ever. In 46 innings the Dodgers are dingerless against Cashner. Who will step up to the plate tonight and invoke the spirit of the Babe, calling his shot? My money's on Puig.

Game 144 Thread: Sept. 8 vs. Padres, 7p

"DesperadoooOOOOHMYGODITHURTS."
Magic Number: A.J. Ellis
Clayton Kershaw (17-3, 1.70) vs. Desperado Migraines (3-5, 3.05)

After finally dispatching the woeful DBacks yesterday, the Dodgers begin their final series with the Padres tonight. The Padres haven't exactly been decent this year, but they have been playing well since the break, and took two of three from the Blue two weeks ago in San Diego. They're starting the oddly-named Desperado Migraines, hoping to give the Dodgers another headache.

The Dodgers counter with Clayton Kershaw, who's like, good...and stuff.

Odrisamer Despaigne anagram research by SoSG Sax. Others include: reimposed gardenias, disorganised ampere, misdiagnosed reaper, and misprised orangeade.

Game 143 Thread: Sept. 7 vs. Snakes, 1p

Zack Greinke (13-8, 2.72) vs. Trevor Cahill (3-10, 5.06).

FIVE PEOPLE A.J. ELLIS' BOBBLEHEAD RESEMBLES MORE THAN A.J. ELLIS HIMSELF

	1. "Ham" from The Sandlot
	2. Simon Pegg
	3. Jesse Tyler Ferguson
	4. Amy Poehler
	5. Eminem