Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Diamondbacks Mascot Wreaking Havoc in Traffic, Children's Dreams

"The 'D' is for 'DUI'."

Although costumed characters in baseball parks aren't a popular tradition, some teams are taking the non-traditional route with fine results. Other teams, not so much. From The Arizona Republic:

D-Backs fire D. Baxter after DUI arrest

The Diamondbacks have cut ties with the man who played their team mascot, D. Baxter the Bobcat, after he was arrested on suspicion of extreme DUI.

David Hamilton, 35, was fired by the Diamondbacks three weeks ago. The club said it only recently learned of Hamilton's arrest, which took place in September. [...]

Hamilton was pulled over off the Loop 101at 95th Avenue and Peoria on Sept. 10, according to an Arizona Department of Public Safety report.

According to the report, an officer spotted Hamilton traveling approximately 95 mph on the 101.

Hamilton, who was driving a Toyota Scion bearing the Diamondbacks' logo, had a blood-alcohol level of 0.155, according to the result of a toxicology report. That's close to twice the legal limit of .08. He also admitted to officers that he had smoked marijuana earlier in the day.

The mascot costume was in the back of the vehicle, the report said.

Who knew the Diamondbacks even had a mascot? From the team's official website:

In June of 2000, D. Baxter the Bobcat was introduced as a member of the Diamondbacks. Baxter immediately won over the crowd with his stunning athleticism, crazy antics and good looks.

"Good looks"? The creature is TERRIFYING. The vaguely Kenny Rogers-like face. The lack of pants. And those dead, dead eyes so familiar to horror fans:

The children of Arizona see D. Baxter the Bobcat in their nightmares.

Also, what's the most fascinating part of this story? Drunk and stoned? Extreme DUI (brought to you by Mountain Dew)? A Diamondback-logoed Scion doing 95? The costume in the trunk? Thank the baseball gods for giving us this story during such fallow times.

(Thanks to Dodger Thoughts poster "fiddlestick" for the heads-up!)

top photo by Jon Willey/Diamondbacks


Steve Sax said...

I am totally freaked out by that mascot. His expression appears constipated.

Orel said...

Constipated...with evil!

Wesley Vento said...

They really should put some pants on that thing. Baseball doesn't need mascots. The only one I'm ok with is Bernie Brewer and the Sausage Racers in Miller Park.