Friday, April 12, 2013

Game 10 Thread: April 12 @ Snakes, 6:30p

Clayton Kershaw (2-0, 0.00) vs. Patrick Corbin (1-0, 3.00)

Enough has been said about the unmitigated bullshit fertilizer of last night. Time to channel that anger into soundly beating the DBacks.

KEMP SMASH.*

*...the baseball. If you're not suspended. Which you haven't been as of this writing.

UPDATE (4:01pm) OK, maybe not quite enough has been said:

Hate you, Carlos.

156 comments:

MR.F said...

I have a question for the other caller, Nomo. I'm concerned that adding Puig as a pitcher would screw up the chemistry of the team. Why does Nomo think that adding Puig as another pitcher would help team chemistry?

Hideo Nomo said...

Uh...bababooey?

Hideo Nomo said...

Post updated with depressing as fuck Greinke news.

Cliff Beefpile said...

DAMMIT!

Fuck you: San Diego, Carlos Quentin, Quentin Tarantino, San Quentin, Quinton McCracken, Quint from 'Jaws' (well, actually no, he was kind of a badass), and the letter Q!

Hideo Nomo said...

Quentin:
"I do have a lot of remorse that someone did get hurt. But I will repeat that I felt I had to protect myself."

I think we need a Carlos Quentin Stupid Quotes Repository.

MR.F said...

Hey someone got their cast off.

https://twitter.com/HanleyRamirez/status/322842463767261184/photo/1

BJ Killeen said...

At least some good news today...

BJ Killeen said...

Los Angeles Dodgers:
1. LF: Jerry Hairston
2. 2B: Mark Ellis
3. CF: Matt Kemp
4. 1B: Adrian Gonzalez
5. 3B: Juan Uribe
6. RF: Andre Ethier
7. C: A.J. Ellis
8. SS: Justin Sellers
9. SP: Clayton Kershaw

BJ Killeen said...

What Does Name "Quentin" Mean
You attract success and money, but will either be very wealthy or very poor because your good judgment fails at times.

Dusty Baker said...

I want to slice Quentin's fucking ears off, and pour gasoline all over him.

Neeebs said...

Stupid Stanford grad!

MR.F said...

Did Quentin actually graduate from Stanford? I suspect he didn't.

So not only did he go to Stanford, he also dropped out because he's a douche idiot.

MR.F said...

I want to turn into a dragon and burn Quentin so he does a horribly painful, firey death.

Dusty Baker said...

I want to go all beginning-of-the-movie-Gladiator on Quentin.

#UnleashHell

Hideo Nomo said...

I want to fart in his general direction.

Dusty Baker said...

Hearing 8 days is the only suspension Quentin will get.

Orel said...

8 days seems to be the max.

Orel said...

Jeff Passan ‏@JeffPassan 21m

Source: MLB will suspend Padres outfielder Carlos Quentin for eight games for charging the mound against Zack Greinke.

Orel said...

Quentin to miss 8 days. Greinke to miss 8 weeks.

Orel said...

JHJ 1-game suspension. Matt Kemp ZERO-game suspension.

Orel said...

Quentin appealing, so we might see him Monday at DS. Bring your batteries!

MR.F said...

8 games?!?!?!?! That's it?!?!?!? FUCK THIS SHIT

Wicks said...

Are you guys seeing what is going on in the seats behind home plate? They made the Dodgers fans take their Dodgers shirts off and gave them D-bags shirts. WTF.

MR.F said...

Is it possible to face a harsher suspension after the appeal?

ie, Quentin appaels; appeal gets denied; Quentin gets longer suspension?

Hideo Nomo said...

Pretty cool when Vin says something I essentially said in a tweet earlier, re: Kershaw/Parra.

Wicks said...

Man Uribe's bat speed is GONE. he has to cheat on everything. I can't see him being on this team come July.

MR.F said...

Uribe probably tried to eat the meat of "faster" animals to regain his bat speed, but it didn't work.

Alex said...

Something, something, shit camp!!

Alex said...

SITDOWN

Pistol Pete Reiser said...

I'm really angry.

Fuck fuckity fuck.

Alex said...

Tell the fucktard who's doin hood whistles to shut the fuck up already

BJ Killeen said...

At least the gnats lost

karen said...

Mr F..."Someone got their cast off today", so did I! At first I thought maybe you were following me??!!

Alex said...

Nice hustle, Sellblock!

Orel said...

"Let's intentionally walk Kershaw to get to Crawford."

Orel said...

I expect Karen in the Dodgers' lineup in two weeks.

Orel said...

At least Clayton made contact.

karina said...

Epale everyone!

Gerardo Parra doesn't play for Aguilas anymore and was traded to the hated Leones, so you know he will kill us :(

karen said...

@Orel...I think I could probably do as well as Urine.

karen said...

EPALE KARINA!! I'm glad you're here. I've missed you.

karina said...

SISTAH! yeah, school keeps me busy :(

Alex said...

Right on cue, Karina...

Para with a basehit.

EPALE!

Franklin Stubbs said...

Good evening, fellow conspirators!

Is it time hit Parra so hard Quentin feels it?

Pistol Pete Reiser said...

I tell ya... This Mets v Twins game is Awful.

What'd ya suppose Parra and Belli are chirping about?

Orel said...

We need Clayton to keep his nose clean.

karina said...

@PPP chirping about getting traded from Aguilas?

karina said...

PARRA BROKE KERSH'S STREAK

karen said...

@PPP-Whatever it is, I'm proud of Belli. It's very Matty Kemp of him.

karen said...

Not only did gnats lose, but Sergio Romo is the one who lost it.

How very cool.

Steve Sax said...

Kemp: please channel your anger into your bat

Steve Sax said...

@Mr F 5:30p: if we're talking stupid people who don't graduate, may I submit Jason Kidd

Pistol Pete Reiser said...

Parra's my fav

Pistol Pete Reiser said...

Saxy

Don't cap on Kidd! I used to get my haircut by the same barber he went to as a kid. Cut Chris Mullen's hair, too.

I'm proud of that. I know I shouldn't be.

I blame this Awful game.


Omfg!

The Twinkies just put in Akbar!!!!!! So fucking good to see him!!!!

BJ Killeen said...

Steve Sax coaching 1B for dbacks. I'm ok with that.

Franklin Stubbs said...

I always thought Chris Mullen was born with that haircut.

Pistol Pete Reiser said...

The reverse mullet?

Hideo Nomo said...

A lot of my anger from last night has been quelled by the Los Angeles Schadenfreude of Anaheim.

Pity I don't get to hear Roger Lodge frantically make excuses anymore.

Orel said...

Angry Kemp seems pretty much the same as Placid Kemp.

Pistol Pete Reiser said...

Update from Minni:

Temperature 32, 25 with wind, snowing.

Jamey Carroll popped out to shallow right, bottom 8.

I think Gardenhire went home an hour ago.

Slick play by Juan.

karina said...

Uribe is the leader of the team on hr

Steve Sax said...

Corbin is at 104 pitches. This has to be it for him soon

Make it soon, Dodgers!

Orel said...

Juan Uribe, on-base machine.

Steve Sax said...

Uribe is leader of the team on circumference

Franklin Stubbs said...

It's never a pity not to hear Roger Lodge, Gnomes

Orel said...

Annnnnd Ethier hits into a first-pitch DP to let Corbin off the hook. A Whole New Blue!

Steve Sax said...

Uribe coaxes a 7-pitch walk. Andre comes up right after and GIDP on one pitch. Nice.

Franklin Stubbs said...

That was a sweet move

Franklin Stubbs said...

Time to hit, assholes

karina said...

infuriating

Steve Sax said...

Time for another Kershaw HR

Base hit? I'll take it

Steve Sax said...

Yeah, good idea to give Crawford a rest day and start Hairston.

Steve Sax said...

Lets put the guy batting .083 at lead off!

WTF

Steve Sax said...

Working on Candy Crush 140

Alex said...

(Downloads Candy Crush)

Pistol Pete Reiser said...

Come on blue.

karen said...

Candy Crush? Is that like some kind of stripper you're working on over there Saxy?

Steve Sax said...

Kemp, one-out base hit here in the eighth

Steve Sax said...

@karen, lets just say I've got candy crush licked

Steve Sax said...

Men at corners with one out

And here comes Crawford.

Alex said...

90 ft away with Crawdaddy up!

Hideo Nomo said...

@Sax 8:49

YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAH!

BJ Killeen said...

CC level 181 is killing me. Come on Crawfish.

Alex said...

SHITCAMP

BJ Killeen said...

Ugh

Hideo Nomo said...

Eh, at least no DP.

Steve Sax said...

Crawford chases a curve to K

This lineup order sucks

Alex said...

C'mon Dre, hometown hero shit right here

Steve Sax said...

Too many men left stranded

Steve Sax said...

This will not end well

Steve Sax said...

FUCK

Alex said...

why must we sucketh with the wood?

BJ Killeen said...

Dying here.

Steve Sax said...

I am depressed.

Time for bourbon.

Steve Sax said...

@Alex: we don't suck with the wood. We just suck getting past that force field between third and home

karen said...

Looks like something going on with Kobe. Injury wise.

Franklin Stubbs said...

Nothing like a CG loss to put a twist in one's drawers.

Steve Sax said...

Lakers down by one, 10:30 in the 3rd

Steve Sax said...

Impressed that kemp didn't let that get past him there

Franklin Stubbs said...

Relieved that he didn't break anything.

Steve Sax said...

Dammit dammit dammit

Franklin Stubbs said...

Whatever. Lose by 1, lose by 7.

karen said...

Vinny...Dodgers have done it again. They have left 9.

Oh crap. That shitstain Para.

(My new fav word, shitstain. Thanks Rbn!)

Alex said...

@Saxy

Re:wood

True dat

Steve Sax said...

We have to sit Clayton. He's at 108 pitches

Steve Sax said...

Please, pull him

Thank you

Steve Sax said...

Donnie has given up the hoodie and has moved to a poncho trashbag

Franklin Stubbs said...

I'm not super-pleased with this

Orel said...

shitstain

Franklin Stubbs said...

Yeah. This is going to go well.

Steve Sax said...

What the fuck is Donnie doing putting tolleson in here

BJ Killeen said...

Mattingly is a assclown

Steve Sax said...

Donnie, what the fuck

karen said...

This is the kind of game you remember in September.

Orel said...

Tolleson takes five pitches to double the D'backs' lead.

Franklin Stubbs said...

Yep, i'm done with this shite.

Steve Sax said...

Donnie must have just been tired of hearing Vin say this was going to be a one-run game

BJ Killeen said...

Loser

Steve Sax said...

Tolleson cannot throw a strike. Nor should he be expected to be calm having just been called up after yesterday's game

BJ Killeen said...

My cat can pitch better than this clown.

karen said...

Whew. Just foul.

Franklin Stubbs said...

This only means we'll score a meaningless run next inning

Orel said...

Genius move, Donnie.

BJ Killeen said...

Damn this guy is good

Steve Sax said...

I'm less posses about losing this game than I am watching Donnie kick Kershaw in the nuts by letting his runners score through incompetence.

Lose the #2 pitcher last night. Piss off the #1 tonight. Great.

Orel said...

"Now pitching, Fluffy Killeen."

Franklin Stubbs said...

What is it about these chumps that seem to have our number?

BJ Killeen said...

Rusty actually. And you should see his hair ball. No one will touch it.

Franklin Stubbs said...

Oh, shut your hole, Arizona. You got two gift runs, so stop running your mouth.

Alex said...

@Saxy 9:19

I always held back my criticism of Donnie but this shit don't make sense

BJ Killeen said...

Stunned we are only down by 3

BJ Killeen said...

Finally

karen said...

Siddown Marte.

Alex said...

Kersh looks pissed

Franklin Stubbs said...

Two consolation runs up next

Steve Sax said...

Fuck seadoo

Alex said...

^ and then some por favor

Orel said...

@BJ: Any relation to Rusty Staub?

Steve Sax said...

Jellis just hacking up there

Steve Sax said...

Booker's bourbon. Not bad, especially as I'm feeling a cold coming on

Orel said...

Punto singles, Schumaker walks. JHJ is the tying run.

karen said...

C'mon Jr. Hit the ball like its a friar.

Steve Sax said...

In good news, I just finished candy crush level 140

Steve Sax said...

Dear Jerry Hairston,

You suck.

Sax

Franklin Stubbs said...

Bollocks.

Alex said...

Fuck the Dbags

Steve Sax said...

Lakers down by seven, 7:50

Orel said...

No hitting, meet no bullpen.

Hideo Nomo said...

Why didn't be just serve his suspension?

Steve Sax said...

Blake with a big three

Steve Sax said...

Tied at 107

Orel said...

Kobe with two clutch threes.

Paul said...

Team is starting to come together!

Together down the toilet.

Orel said...

Probable torn Achilles for Kobe.

Alex said...

Who has a Lakers voodoo doll?

Steve Sax said...

Lakers win, but probably lose Kobe

It's like Greinke all over again

Steve Sax said...

PGT up