But in all seriousness, I'm honored that Mr LA Sports Fan opted to play Commissioner and nine other SoSG readers are taking part. So hopefully, I don't do you all a disservice and overcome my football (especially fantasy football) naivete to recap a big Week 9.
Dusty Baker 93 (7-2) upset by Nic J 98 (3-6): In just his second loss of the season, Dusty Baker (7-2) looked to Wes Welker in his starting lineup, and Welker delivered a pathetic four points. Not that Dusty had a lot of other options; his benched player only contributed five points at the WR slot. And, so, Nic J took control of the head-to-head matchup, thanks in part to his kicker Akers who had four FG and two extra points to amass 15 points for the week. Fear the foot.
Jason 49 (2-7) slaughtered by Mr. LA Sports Fan 119 (3-6): The battle of 2-6 teams did not go well for Jason, who depended on Seattle RB Lynch to back up his first-stringer from Cincinnati; Marshawn only delivered four points (which I suppose is over 8% of the total week's points, so that isn't all that bad). Meanwhile, Mr. LA Sports Fan had the week's top score, overcoming Thomas Jones' putrid three-point performance through 31-point and 18-point contributions from others.
Professor Dittmore 98 (7-2) beats Karina 92 (5-4): The Professor sat Buffalo WR Evans, which worked out well (he would have contributed only 3 points)--but rode the shoulders of Rodgers, the Cal alum and under-rated Green Bay QB, to victory. Karina was close behind thanks to a great 26-point contribution from Minnesota's Adrian Peterson, but benching Larry Fitzgerald at the WR slot (he had 10 points) was a mistake that would have made the difference in the matchup. Sigh.
Paul 81 (5-4) loses to Meaniebreanie 95 (4-5): Paul can't blame Charger WR Sevi Ajirotutu (whose name rocks the house btw), given his 23-point performance that was the team's second-best contribution this week. But the most points across both teams in the matchup went to Meaniebreanie's Terrell Owens, the volatile Bengals WR, who picked up 26 fantasy points despite his team losing on Monday night.
Spanky 65 (4-5) crushed by Mr. Customer 109 (5-4): Two 4-4 teams met, but Spanky did not come out on top this week; luckily, the benching of Ochocinco (who had only one point) wasn't the deciding factor in Spanky's demise. No, Mr. Customer got an unlikely 18-point contributions from Giants WR Nicks, whose 18 points helped propel Mr. C to victory.
So there you have it, fantasy football recapped for the masses. Week 10's big matchup is Mr. Customer vs. Dusty Baker, with the other four head-to-head plays being Meaniebreanie vs. Mr. LA SportsFan, Spanky vs. the Professor, Jason vs. Nic J, and karina vs. Paul. Go to it, sports fans!
122 comments:
Great recap, Saxy. We'll get you watching the gridiron yet.
Well, my dear Sax, I don't know anything about football, but I'm having the time of my life playing with my sistah and the guys.
I only have three guys playing in the early set. This is the most bored I'll be on a Sunday since football started.
@ Czar
Same here. And one of them is my kicker so it is really like only 2 players.
Those are some, er, unique uniforms the Bears are sporting there.
Whoever has Cutler just got two easy points.
Oh. Oops.
F!U! Cutler!
All three guys in the red zone at the same time.
Freeman just connected to give me one TD. Browns can't get going, so I don't get anything from Hillis. Still waiting on MJD and the Jags.
P.Ditty has Favre as QB and the Bears D. Kinda defeats the purpose, no.
Hedging his bets, maybe?
I am going to regret starting Vernon Davis, aren't I?
Day of the kicker. Six field goals already.
Sonofabitch, Hillis.
Next time I play FF I won't be stubborn and pick players from every team. Depending on OchoCinco and third rate players for points fucking sux.
Poor Nic. He's got six guys going and a grand total of 12 points to show.
I should have picked up the Colts' D.
All I know, Bironas will be my kicker forever because the dude don't miss.
What happened to A.P.?
Woohoo Peyton Hillis!
Go Blount Go!
I am going to make sweet,sweet Ebonic love to LaGarret Blount.
What's the difference between regular love and ebonic love? Poor grammar?
^LaGarrette. haha
Shit, how does Tampa Bay have two scoring drives with the quarterback throwing the ball a grand total of three times?
Bill Plaschke must have returned to twitter just to piss me off. Dissing Kobe for the Black Ops commercial, and now Peyton Hillis? The man knows how to push my buttons.
What did he say about hillis?
"Peyton hillis? Really? Still?"
Plaskes' an idiot. Look at Mr.Cs' and Dustys' score. Who knew?!
Black Cats have crossed someone's path.
Good day for the Gunners.
When MJD runs the ball, good things happen. Take note of that, Del Rio.
Woohoo MJD!
Your game is getting out of hand.Looks like Meanie is going to need a huge game from the accused.
The women of SoSG are no match for my mother, the Czar.
Well fuck me.
Got a TD from OchoCinco taken away from me.
(cries)
How has Freeman only thrown the ball five times?
Got my OchoCinco TD.
Woohoo Freeman gets the TD!
I warned Ditty. I told him to not trust Favre. But did he listen? Did he heed my advice? Nope.
P.Ditty did not get any points from that fumble because he has ChicagoD and Favre.
I know they offset, but that's the problem. If he had another QB, he'd be getting the actual points. Having the QB of the team playing against the defense just defeats the purpose.
Cutler is doing good. Fuck, I was saving him for Brees' bye but he was pissing me off and I let him go with ESG.
Another Favre pick.
I'm driving my Viking-loving nephew nuts with my accurate predictions of Favre interceptions.
At least by picking up Fred Jackson, I prevent others from getting him and his juicy 21 points.
I had him on my team a long time ago. Geez, they leave me and do good. Typical.
The only reason why I'm keeping Deion Branch and Patrick Crayton is so that nobody else can get them. Though I'll probably drop Crayton after this week since Floyd and V-Jax are coming back.
Smart move by Nic to drop Folk.
You Shyster. Haha!
Dusty's gotta be going nuts right now. Turner did nothing, Foster's been okay, Manning hasn't thrown for a single TD, Marcedes has just two points.
I have three of the top four scorers, one of whom is on the bench.
Andre Johnson is killing me and that TD the Colts D got taken away right now is going to, too.
Whew! FG instead of TD for Tamme or Brown.
Epall Y'all
Excellent recap Saxy!
It's been a blast playing with the guys and my sistah from another mother. I was a fantasy football virgin but now I am learning albeit the hardway.
This week the Czar is on his way to handily kicking my ass :(
(cries)
OchoCinco my put down.
^Epale
^heard
WTF! Mistake city.
What's the haps, Meanie?
Hey Spank,
Just getting caught up after being out of town. What about you?
My players have chosen to hibernate today. Currently I have the least amount of points of anyone on the board.
(cries)
Meanie
Not much,Just recovering from spontaneous drinking sessions with a buddy who is splitting town for good.
I officially have the three top scorers so far. One is on the bench.
(cries)
LASC - don't you think you are punishing me enough?
No, no I don't.
If you were to tell me that I would be within 10 points of P.Ditty by the second Sunday game I would have said "You're Crazy!"
LASC, I don't know what I did to piss you off but remember that karma can be a bitch.
I lost five of my first seven games. Karma's in effect right now.
I should have played Mr.C this week.
Jay Cutler with 19 points. Well shut my mouth!
I have 18 points spread across 4 players. Totally pathetic!
I've been there Meanie. Trust me I know what you are going through.
Joe Suck has definitely colored his hair. It's a horrible job. His colorist should be shot.
Gotta go.I'll be back and hopefully winning upon my return.
Austin has sucked so bad the past few weeks I benched him. Of course he's looking good today.
(cries even more)
Hey kids! I'm getting crushed today with Interception Machine Eli back in action. C'est la vie.
I have the lead!
WTF! Dallas is beating the NY Football Giants. HaHa!
Chad Henne ended up with 11 points. Ditty Fail.
Karina is lucky she did not use the Chiefs D. -7 points so far.
Just had a chance run-in with SoSG Sax at the (redacted) airport. How random! We did not have time to make sweet, sweet love, alas. Plus, our wives were there.
who knew?
It's Mama Meanie's birthday and I need to head out for her celebration. Mr. LASC, easy please.
GO COWBOYS!
Happy Birthday Mama Meanie!
I am going to make sweet,sweet love to Matt Cassel. I am such a slut today.
Goddamn Orton screws me over by benching him AGAIN!
Come on Ram D. Don't fuck up my shit man.
Looks like Nic's winning streak will be short-lived.
He changed his team name and fucked up his mojo. It happened to me last week.
I'm willing to trade Thomas Jones to anyone who wants him.
I like how Buck, Aikman and Johnson are all talking about how great the Cowboys have been just as they choke the game away.
I have the Cardinal game. Lucky for me I don't have to listen to that bullshit.
Fuck it. I am celebrating garbage TD's.
FUCK YEAH CASSEL!
Stop throwing the ball DAMMIT. No INTS!
I HATE the fucking niners.
I'll be around, but I'm doing 15 things at once.
I need Mendenhall to go apeshit.
I need Wes Welker to go apes....oh.
Come on Accused. You can throw it to Ward better than that.
"Illegal touching on the kicking team."
Sounds like they molested little kids.
Ben Rothelistwebergerstein is not a smart feller.
He might be a fart smeller.
Balls. I'm going back to .500
Mr. C,
What the hell with Torres? Brilliant v. Chelsea; for shite v. Stoke.
Ankle injury, but he's playing for Espana. That boy's an enigma.
@rbnlaw
He is a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma. Same old frustrating Reds. At least they're not awful ALL the time now.
The ankle didn't seem like it was a major setback. Who knows how much action he'll see for the Spanish?
What is this strange Premiership you all speak of?
*avoids football news after pitiful loss*
Torres got me -3 points in fantasy league today.
It was putrid. I can't deny it.
At least Inter lost. Bite me, Rafa.
Lakers losing in the 4th and P.Ditty is going to get garbage points. What comes around goes around.
NicJ left Tom Brady on the bench. Poor lad.
Stop throwing to 60 minutes DAMMIT.
Phoenix is 22-40 from 3. WTF.
sorry to get here late, but all's I gots to say is...
SIXTY MINUTES
SIXTY MINUTES
SIXTY MINUTES
*flips bird at the Ditts*
:)
That was huge tonight after Matt Cassel had an out-of-body experience.
Crazy day in fantasy football.
Unless I lose 12 points tomorrow on Phiwwies' defence, I'm good to go.
Like I said P.Ditty, What comes around goes around. Them garbage points are a blessing and a curse, man. Plus Hines Ward getting his neck snapped in two did not help me.
Mike Wallace ensured a fantasy victory for me.
Thank goodness the Steeler defense decided to roll over and die, or I might have had a precarious situation on my hands.
you know it's a strange day when both the Bills and Cowboys get wins
You'd think the Cowboys won the Super Bowl the way the media is fawning over them today. Do me,Cowboys.Do me.
I am the only one to comment on this thread for the Monday night game. You have got to be kidding me. Front runners the lot of Y'alls.
killkillKill
*mas cerveca
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