Wednesday, December 19, 2007

THEY'RE COMING TO GET YOU, BARBARA...

I was enjoying my Pumpkin Patch health shake at Jamba Juice when a young man entered like a cold breeze. He looked me in the eyes and asked, "Are you a Dodgers fan?" Several answers rushed through my head - "Not since they left Brooklyn," "Only players under 26 years old," "What is this Baseballs?" "I only carry small bills." But honesty prevailed, as I hid my Treo from his intense yet reassuring gaze. "Yes, yes I am. I'm actually a writer for...." Then I stopped myself: What if this guy was a spy sent by Steve Sax?

Turns out, this industrious whippersnapper was part of a team going door-to-door in Los Feliz with the Dodgers deal of the century.

$40 for six "2-for-1" vouchers AND a pair of free tickets. I did the math, and came up with a savings of $200 to $300. My wife did the same math, and came up with a net gain of -$40.

So if you should see a trio that looks like Jehovah's Witnesses, rest assured. They've been sent by the Dodger gods to get your butts in the seats and save you money. Either that, or I just lost my beer money for the month.

P.S. - Contest. What does my seemingly nonsensical title refer to?

9 comments:

B-Two said...

Never forget, in the late '70s, seeing "Night of the Living Dead" with my brothers one night on Channel 5. I think we referred to it at the time as the "bitchingest" movie ever made.

B-Two said...

Oh yeah ... sorry, but I bet it's a scam and you got hosed.

Orel said...

"My wife did the same math, and came up with a net gain of -$40." Classic!

Delino DeShields said...

I figure if it's a scam, then I got a good story worth about $40. (And I looked online... it's at www.thesmartcircle.com... seems legit)

Delino DeShields said...

BTW B-TWO, You are correct sir. Though I got hooked into the franchise first by the far inferior Return of the Living Dead, simply cause the Zombies yelled out "brains."

Mike Scioscia's tragic illness said...

Though I know it's from "Night of the Living Dead" originally, I will always remember this line more from "Shaun of the Dead", where they named Shaun's mother Barbara simply so Ed could yell into the phone, "WE'RE COMING TO GET YOU, BARBARA!"

Delino DeShields said...

M.S.T.I - great name. I guess you couldn't put the "made us smile" at the end of it.

Mike Scioscia's tragic illness said...

You are correct, Delino.

I wonder how Griffey feels about his "nerve tonic" causing "gigantism" now?

Also, I looked at every single video site I could find to track down that clip of McGwire saying, "do you want to know the awful truth.. or do you want to see me hit some DINGERS!!" Unfortunately, no luck.

JBJ-1138 said...

NIGHTOFTHELIVINGDEAD LIKE A MOFO!